The state of the Nation, fowarded by Rex Brain.
Guardian.uk article referred by John Tenniswood. Hotlinked to raise your pulse rate
The above revelationary article from the UK Guardian was forwarded to me by JT on 8th October 2009 and sent my pulse into a spin. America’s Heartland in strife – who would imagine? There but for the grace of God (sic) go all Western economies, but the Pollies continue to spend, spend spend as if there’s no tomorrow. Cinch in yer belts cheps – it can happen to all of us, and there’s no fucking Conan the Terrible here!
PREVIOUSLY PUBLISHED PHOTOS OF MUSLIM PROTESTORS MOCKING BRITISH TROOPS HAVE BEEN REMOVED. YOU TUBE CLIPS ON THIS MATTER CAN BE PICKED UP FROM THE LINKS BELOW.
KILLING OF NON MUSLIMS IS LEGITIMATE?
9/11 A DAY OF SORROW
Let us never forget this enemy and what the bastards are capable of doing!
THIS SECTION OF THE PAGE HEADER IS UNDER CONSTRUCTION WITH FRESH MATERIAL
Editor's proposed signage solution for refugees coming to our northern shores
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1,047 responses so far ↓
Editor // December 9, 2008 at 10:58 am |
MUSLIM ‘FREEDOM’ PHOTOS SUPPLIED BY OLD LI SOLDIERS
Can you comprehend this? Beyond me! Enoch Powell, where are you?
HANGED FOR BEING A CHRISTIAN IN IRAN
Bill Griffiths // December 9, 2008 at 9:15 pm |
Ed,
I suppose I can in one way, as you have said many times. Britain isn’t great any more but Grated and hated and to make things worse, our politicians are useless overpaid wankers. See my last joke in the lewd & bawdy.
Politicians have no guts, no heart, no balls, no brains and no spine and, their heads and asses are interchangeable.
I wonder how much it cost us tax payers to provide all the police on duty at this time – every one of them doing absolutely shag all while their senior officers are probably back at the station hiding under their desks. And, I bet nearly all these bastards don’t work, and are living on benefits paid for out of our taxes. If you and I went down the road shouting abuse at some local Queer Vicar or waving a banner like these – we would soon be locked up.
Spray the bastards with indelible red paint so that everyone will know who they are, and what they are.
Jack Madron // December 9, 2008 at 11:53 pm |
Bill.
Don’t waste paint on them. Clear all the coppers out of the way and let the MMG Platoon spray them with the old .303 Mk 8. Z. That would cut their numbers down a bit. Every fifth round must be a tracer so they can see what’s coming at them.
JT // December 10, 2008 at 3:08 pm |
Jack
Have you just invented an islamticide spray? But what about Health and Safety? Will it be noisy? Then the problem with smoke emissions?
Worth checking these things before used in public places.
JT // December 10, 2008 at 4:12 pm |
Jack
Trying to be helpful. Just checked with Wandsworth Borough Council (the local MP is a Mr Shah). They are curiously less than enthusiastic about your plan. They include concerns about effect of noise on family pets, and de old folk.
Enough trouble with fireworks on Nov 5th, they say, also Divali (a Hindu celebration) and those little bastards on the council estates who let fireworks off all the year round.
I mentioned your undoubted experience in disciplined fire control honed to perfection in 1954 – 55 (under the supervision of your dear Mr Hodder) but the lady at the reception desk (she was wearing a head scarf) looked doubtful.
JT // December 10, 2008 at 4:25 pm |
Jack
I think the term “spraying” might give the wrong impression even though it may accurately describe your platoons method of machine gunnery in Jamaica. (Bound to hit someone sooner or later method)
Jack Madron // December 10, 2008 at 8:07 pm |
Hi John.
De old folk wouldn’t mind. It would be de old folk manning the guns. De young folk wouldn’t know how.
A slight correction about dates. Our skills were honed in 1952-54 by (as you say) dear Mr Hodder. 1954-55 by Mr Peter Rowe. Another good osiffer. I knew my luck would turn when I got away from B Coy.
Spraying. Probably the wrong word. Each gun had a zone of fire. When zones overlaped each other, nothing got away. Bound to hit sooner.
Jack Madron // December 11, 2008 at 12:27 am |
Just noticed. Dec 9th. 11-53pm blog. Should have said, 303 Mk 8 Z, not Mk 8 S. Don’t even know if there was a Mk8 S round.
ED: My mistaken correction Jack – you were correct in the original post. Will attend Sah!!
JT // December 11, 2008 at 10:56 am |
Jack
That’s OK then but not after 11 pm or noise abatement hossifers might be called out. Also late enough for de old folk I think.
Spraying out Zoning In?
Jack Madron // December 11, 2008 at 2:00 pm |
Thank you Ed.
Thought I’d hit the s key instead of the z key.
JT.
Will obey the 11pm curfew. Would hate to upset the older old folk. There are one or two Victor Meldrews around still, I believe.
Arnold Pullthrew // December 11, 2008 at 5:32 pm |
Letter from Wandsworth Borough Council
Dear Mr Pullthrew
Further to your visit to our offices and your conversation with Ms Jasmin Bin Liner our receptionist.
The pictures you left with her were of happy enthusiastic youngsters bringing the good tidings that in the fullness of time that UK will soon be under Sharia Law.
This will include
Stoning (women only)
Circumcision of female infants (razor blade method)(or bits of broken glass)
Honour killing (of women)
Hanging homosexuals
Banning alcohol
Beheading apostates
Going to Mecca for a holiday to throw pebbles at a rock (Council Grant available)
Naturally this is in line with current progressive Council thinking.
Regards
Ibrahim Waleed Muhammed
Head of Multi-culture Department
(Mayor elect)
Arnold Pullthrew // December 11, 2008 at 9:16 pm |
Extract from Letter from Home Office Immigration Dept
copy
Dear Mr Pullthrew
Just because you were”nearly posted to Tel el Kebir in 1954″ does not as you claim, make you an expert in Middle East Affairs. Furthermore your reference to a song “Queen Farina Queen of all the Wogs” is offensive to say the least and if I may say so, a little dated .
Editor // December 11, 2008 at 10:41 pm |
CHECK OUT THIS CONVOLUTED CROCK OF SHIT!
20+ years of Mugabe’s (the class dunce) “rule”, turning the ricebowl of Africa into the dustbowl of Hell – and still the closest neighbours support the maniac! 1st rule in becoming an African Politician – expunge your common sense and logic from your brain and get a fucking lobotomy. Dunno about ‘grass roots’ politics – more like back into the fucking trees with all the other gorillas.
Ragheads in the UK, exploiting the precise freedom they would deny and Toerags in SA walking around with their heads up their arses. Fucking unbelievable! All politicians and elected Governments (can we really describe ‘em thus?) stand idly by and watch the world descend into the abyss of crime against humanity and global anarchy. Fucking gutless wonders! How is Flash Gordon going to react?
No good expecting Rub a Dud Rudd in OZ to lift a finger, he’s too busy giving our dollars to the largest Muslim nation on Earth, where terrorists are lauded and revered. Kill an Aussie and get FF points and a cash bonus!
How soon before ebola, cholera and tuberculosis and other rampantly uncontrolled diseases travel on aircraft and infest the peace loving parts of the globe? Guess what – British, US and Commonwealth troopers will be sent to subdue the inevitable rioters – all paid for and supported by the tax coffers of the West.
Fuck Me! Enoch – the arseholes never learn! Bring back the cane, the death penalty and the best parts of the Feudal System! During the Japanese occupation of Singapore, the military beheaded 4 thieves and stuck their heads on poles around the captured Island. Guess What? – no crime during the Japanese time!
‘Nuther thing! – How come British Law permits visual crime/threats – a la the nauseating placards waved by these shitheads pictured above – surely that’s as pernicious as verbal/uttered threats? Just imagine Christians parading in downtown Tehran or Baghdad, waving crap like that! – Fucking riots, beheadings and bullets, that’s what!
Grated Fucking Britain all right, if it wasn’t for your glorious weather – you all might just as well emigrate to Queensland or Tasmania – but guess what – we’ve got the fuckers here as well, spreading their religious crap and bludging off our society. And moreover they’re encouraged by the Lefties, the Courts and the Pollies to create ghettos and separatist schools and mosques where ‘westerners’ – their (reluctant) hosts in this country – are barred, unless you convert of course. Bah! Humbug! Col Ted Bear – there’s a job here for you – as a fucking hand grenade.
JT // December 13, 2008 at 2:51 pm |
Cholera in Zim?
Not at all says Dr Mugwump, it’s all a Western Plot. Well he’s the Doc.
JT // December 13, 2008 at 10:29 pm |
Derek
British Law does not permit any such behaviour. Unless it is ethnic minorities acting against whitey. White folk are forbidden to upset anyone.
Latest news coming out about the seasonal insanity regarding Nativity plays at schools. No mention of Jesus for example. Doh!
No Christmas Cards.
Help.
ED: Well ‘Fuck Me’ said the Anglican Bishop – more in hope than anger!
PS: I kinda like this one though JT – appeals to my controversial nature “Vegetables depict the Nativity“ Interesting also – in OZ we’re 10 hours ahead of GMT. This is posted at 0913 am on the 14th December. The BBC clip is dated 18th December 2008. In that case – what about the winners at Cheltenham?
Jack Madron // December 14, 2008 at 12:24 am |
John.
What about the vicar who banned “Oh Little Town of Bethlehem”? Said the modern Bethlehem was not peaceful enough. The prat hasn’t heard about the nice King Herrod.
God save us from religious twats of all faiths.
JT // December 14, 2008 at 2:02 pm |
Jack
The carol “Good Christian Men Rejoice” is about as popular as Eskimo Nell in carol services.
On another note, do they still do Bingo and 10 pin bowling in Mecca? Just a thought for a British Legion package holiday.
JT // December 14, 2008 at 2:07 pm |
I see pictures of Big Willy and Ginger Knob out shooting at Sandringham. Thought these 2 wankers were supposed to be in the army. Only the other week they were crossing Africa on Motor Bikes. Often reported doing stuff outside the service. They obviously get more leave than we used to get.
JT // December 14, 2008 at 2:39 pm |
Big Willy has grown a beard. Get this – “As a disguise when serving undercover with SBS in Barbados in anti drug missions”
Yeah right. That’s about as active service as our Horseshoe Bay operations in Bermuda.
JT // December 14, 2008 at 2:41 pm |
Like Ginger Knob famously firing a 50 cal through a window watched anxiously by his Ghurka minder.
Jack Madron // December 14, 2008 at 10:42 pm |
John.
I think they get a medal for every peasant (I mean pheasant) they shoot. Where else do they get all those gongs. Goering? They should be issued with Stens and dirty ammo. That would make it interesting.
JT // December 16, 2008 at 3:56 pm |
David Cameron (rich ex Etonian) says that people receiving Benefits are scroungers (put em all to work and bring back the workhouse?) (concentration camps?)
15 of his shadow Ministers went to Eton. Not the faintest idea of the life most of us live. I am willing to bet that Mrs Cameron banks her child allowance. Bet their rich parents or grandparents bank their State Pensions.
It’s the f…ing rich bastards who have brought us to ruin with their fiddles and greed not the poor fuckers with no education living in sink estates with no hope. Is the rich bastard who banks offshore and avoids most or all taxes less of a scrounger?
Can we have a guillotine in Berkeley square instead of that bloody nightingale
Bah Humbug
JT // December 16, 2008 at 4:07 pm |
I would like to see all politicians have to live on Job Seekers allowance of about £60 per week in a council flat on one of many sink estates for 6 months. (Naturally the rent would be paid as housing benefit). If they have young kids then let the whole family live on benefits – the kids can go to their local “multicutural” school
THEY HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA
JT // December 16, 2008 at 4:15 pm |
It’s the same the ole world over
It’s the poor wot gets the blame
It’s the rich wot gets the gravy
Ain’t it a bloomin’ shame
JT // December 16, 2008 at 8:07 pm |
Vivitur parvo bene
“You can live well on a little” (Horace – who the f..k was he?) spoken like a rich Tory asshole.
Example to the contrary – you live in Zimbabwe
I am reduced to drinking Tesco own brand Red. But poor old Bill can’t drink at all. Look at the money you save Billy.
Bill Griffiths // December 17, 2008 at 9:16 pm |
Hi JT
I have just made a New Year’s resolution in advance. Ignore what the doctors tell me and stop taking the tablets, but take more medicine by the glass. Like you, I drink superstore own brand but I reckon it is as good as some of the stuff you buy in fancy named bottles. Plus the fact that, I reckon half the stuff you buy in Pubs comes from supermarkets anyway.
I have seen many guys, obviously Publicans, stuffing their shopping trolleys with enough wine to get all their customers pissed for a year and probably buying for £3 a bottle, and selling six glasses from a bottle at about £2.75 a glass. I have just opened another bottle. ROUGE Vin De Pays – specially bottled for Sainsburys.” Vin De Plonk” £3.50 for six glasses.
Before I go to bed. Cheers. Merry Christmas. Let’s all get Brahms & Liszt together.
Bill & Nancy.
JT // December 17, 2008 at 11:18 pm |
Bill
You are clearly a conniesewer drinking that posh Frog stuff. Expensive taste I see like me. Tesco £3.70 a bottle. Dregs from the Loire valley I believe.
Cheers mon brave and Inkey Pinkey parlez vous to you and Nancy.
Bill Griffiths // December 18, 2008 at 9:13 am |
JT
A couple of bottles a day, should keep the doctor away or at least make things look brighter. My French is limited to names of wine. But – à votre santé et joyeux christmas and bonne et heureuse année
Bill & Nancy
ED: An Englishman, a Frenchman and a Welshman are out walking along the beach together one day. They come across a lantern and a genie pops out of it. “I will give you each one wish” says the genie.
The Welshman says, “I am a farmer, my dad was a farmer, and my son will also farm. I want the land to be forever fertile in Wales.” With a blink of the genie’s eye, ‘FOOM’ – the land in Wales was forever made fertile for farming.
The Frenchman was amazed, so he said, “I want a wall around France, so that no one can steal our precious winemaking secrets. Again, with a blink of the Genie’s eye,’KABOOM’ – there was a huge wall around France.
The Englishman asks, “I’m very curious. Please tell me more about this wall. The Genie explains, “Well, it’s about 150 feet high, 50 feet thick and nothing can get in or out.”
The Englishman says, “Fill it up with water.”
JT // December 18, 2008 at 8:10 pm |
Billy
That’s a long joke. Have you opened your de luxe (bigger jokes) Christmas Crackers early? Don’t want to encourage Jack this year. He gets the Dandy every week with puzzles and everything.
Bill Griffiths // December 18, 2008 at 9:25 pm |
This isn’t supposed to be the joke page. Ed added that one. But, here’s a short one;
Little Sally came home from school and with a smile on her face and told her mother. “Frankie Jones showed me his willy today!” Before the mother could raise a concern, Sally went on to say, “It reminded me of a peanut”
Relaxing with a hidden smile, Sally’s Mum asked, “Really small was it?” Sally replied, “No, salty!”
Bill Griffiths // December 18, 2008 at 9:26 pm |
SORRY, couldn’t resist that one
Bill
Jack Madron // December 19, 2008 at 12:14 am |
JT.
Beano and Dandy.
Bill.
That one did make me laugh. Very good.
JT // December 20, 2008 at 1:32 pm |
Ginger Knob is going to Mauritius for New Year holiday with his 2 protection officers (rooms £1000 per night – perhaps they are sharing) after spending Christmas at Balmoral with Granny. Its a hard life in the army nowadays (for some)
Big Willy will probably spend some days shooting things with Daddy, Granny and Mr Grumps and chasing foxes. No Guard duty for him then.
JT // December 20, 2008 at 1:36 pm |
Course its useful for Big Willy to be in the Army, Navy and the RAF at the same time.
No One can keep track of him.
Jack Madron // December 20, 2008 at 9:30 pm |
JT.
Are you sure they’re in the army?
Derek Lovemore #22935157 // December 21, 2008 at 1:41 am |
FUCK CHRISTMAS
HO! HO! FUCKING HO!
JT // December 21, 2008 at 7:05 pm |
Thanks Ed for your usual sensitive Christmas messages above. You’re just a sentimental old LI man from a bygone age.
Derek Lovemore #22935157 // December 21, 2008 at 11:03 pm |
DEFINITION OF “FUCK”
Editor // December 24, 2008 at 11:03 pm |
ZIMBABWE IS MINE
Merry Christmas Zimbabwe from Your Loving Leader down the path to hell.
Robert
JT // December 30, 2008 at 1:54 am |
These Hamas blokes are like Pavlov’s dog with learning difficulties. “Der hey Mo let’s fire some rockets today. Er the f**king Israelis bombed us again. Dunno why. Bastards.”
All we want to do is exterminate them.
Ghengis Khan ex L/Cpl // December 30, 2008 at 2:05 am |
Yes I believe in overwhelming force. Right or wrong. Anything else just prolongs the conflict.
JT // December 31, 2008 at 3:29 pm |
Right you lot, late on parade. Lets be avin yer.
I see “Unbelievable” has been downgraded to “Bloody”. Very PC Ed
Jack Madron // December 31, 2008 at 3:50 pm |
Yes Sir. Sorry Sir. But somebody’s pinched me Unbelievable, I mean, Bloody beret, Sir.
Happy New Year. JT. Derek. Bill. Swanny. Barry. Barney. Fraser and All LI everywhere.
ED: Thanks Jack – ditto to you all, also.
Jack Madron // December 31, 2008 at 4:45 pm |
Steven Gerrard. Liverpool footballer. Role model. Loving father. Happily married. What the hell was he doing out boozing at 2 -30 am on a Monday? Two years in the LI would do him the world of good.
JT // January 1, 2009 at 2:15 pm |
Jack
Quite right, you wouldn’t see any LI soldier pissed and out late would you?
JT // January 1, 2009 at 2:15 pm |
HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE
Jack Madron // January 1, 2009 at 3:44 pm |
JT.
According to Swanny, there were two or three pissheads in A Coy. The only ones I remember, in Jamaica, were Harold Royffe’s batman, Titch Horder and his mate Pte Lightfoot. Both harmless, just liked their booze.
My old mate, Bob Barrett RIP, liked a drop now and again, but he wasn’t a heavy drinker. Couldn’t afford to be. We didn’t get rum rations in Jamaica. That I can recall.
JT // January 1, 2009 at 8:33 pm |
Jacky
You didn’t need a rum ration at the price you were paying. Also depends what you call pissheads.
Seemed to me that half of A Coy were pissed on pay night in the NAAFI or down town There was no shortage of bodies to pick up from town most weekends when the duty truck did it’s rounds.
Barry did the DCLI drivers do this duty or just the RASC lot? – call at Sailors home 10pm then at the dive on front street. (Mocking Bird usually objecting and sometime trying to get on board with her latest “fiancee “).
Garrison Duty Sgts did this nightly. (Also incidentally calling at Buckaroo for orders of Cheese Burgers for the senior pissheads back at the Sgts Mess.)
Swanny said that the Korean War vets would get a bit “restless”
ED: Was I the only “A” Coy squaddie to live a blameless existence on Bermuda? Not once did I ever see – let alone – get a night ride in the Duty Truck, or ever get nabbed by the Duty Sergeant. Not that we didn’t swill down Tom Collinses or Rums and Cokes, or fail to get Rosie to flash for a shilling – but in that case – where was all the action that we missed out on? I well recall walking back to Barracks through Happy Valley and setting all those mangy dogs barking.
Jack Madron // January 2, 2009 at 12:12 am |
I remember one night, I was guard commander and Dutchy Holland was Battalion Ord Sgnt. He called in to check if everybody had booked in. This was appr 0100hrs. I told him Bob Barrett was still out. He got a push bike and rode off through the Jamaica Regiment lines. Not long after, he rode back in through the gates with Bob draped over his shoulders, called out to me to book him in and took him back to our billet. How many Sgts would have done that?
Bob’s favourite drink was white rum, coke and peppermint. Lethal. His breath used to stink of pure sulphur most of the next day. Don’t know which was worse, rum or schnapps in Germany.
PS. Bob didn’t believe us when we told him how he got back to camp that night. Memories.
Jack Madron // January 2, 2009 at 12:20 am |
JT.
The pissheads I was referring to were the Korean War Vets. I wouldn’t dream of calling anybody else in A Coy that sort of name. Would I?
Jack Madron // January 2, 2009 at 2:01 pm |
Ed. JT.
Getting a bit braver in my old age, yesterday, I was (surfing?) and found a site. Light Infantry Association. Anyhow, I enrolled and last night got confirmation by e mail. Looking through Light Infantry Reunited Guestbook, I found a request from a lady, enquiring if anybody remembers her dad who was in the SCLI. The name was Ian Palmer but he was known as Pedler. You chaps mentioned a Pedler Palmer on W&W. This lady says her mother is on the net nearly all the time. There is an e mail address but I haven’t put it here.
ED: Jack, are you referring to the site wherein LI soldiers are described thus “They were mostly ugly squat men, toothless and pinched-faced, villianous and foul-mouthed, but on a battlefield they were kings and victory was their common coin. They could march and they could fight”.
JT // January 2, 2009 at 2:46 pm |
Ed
The reason why you were not collected by the duty truck. Perhaps you only went to posh places like Swanny where Rosie took her tits out for a shilling.
The duty truck only called at Sailors Home and one other “known but notorious dive (plus the Buckaroo for burgers)
JT // January 2, 2009 at 2:49 pm |
Jack
Pedlar was Colour Sgt A Coy. DCLI. Before SCLI was formed but quite possible him. Jan Passmore was later in SCLI at Osnabruck
Jack Madron // January 2, 2009 at 10:05 pm |
Ed.
Could be the site. Skimmed through twenty pages, another sixteen to go. Mostly 1 LI, 2 LI. There was something about marching and fighting. Did notice two or three queries from Bill. The bit about Ian Palmer was on page two, Light Infantry Reunited. Guestbook.
Probably another blind alley.
Editor // January 4, 2009 at 6:19 am |
THE DEMOLITION OF HAMAS
A clever article in today’s Brisbane Courier Mail parodies “Our Albert and the Lion” so far as the unfortunate Islamists who continue to test the patience of Israel are concerned. See photo of page above – most recent image on the lead page.
The article outlines how – since 2001 – Hamas and its allies have launched 6,400 rockets, mortar bombs and other missiles at Israel and after rejecting the Israeli offer to extend the ‘truce’ fired 80 rockets a day into Israel between 24th and 27th December just passed.
Clearly the lion ain’t amused and looks as if patience with these wayward ‘children of God’ has worn thin. The Israelis warned Rayan by phone before the attack which was ignored, with Rayan and his family taking refuge in their bunker (in their home!). Evidently the laser bombing ignited a stockpile of weapons.
God help the Middle East – ‘cos Allah ain’t!!
JT // January 4, 2009 at 5:37 pm |
He who poke lion should use long stick.
These guys are amazing. They are pissed off because their rockets so far don’t kill many civilians but getting bigger and better ones from Iran.
Then the Izzies kick ass with big boot. and who would have guessed it? Big demo in London. Usual suspects give speeches
Nut Case Tony Benn
Crooked MP Galloway who licked Saddams bum
Ken Livingstone (ex IRA supporter)
CND lot
Marxist renta crowd
Not ONE mention that if Hamas – who broke the cease fire and hide among civvies – it might stop.
Editor // January 4, 2009 at 6:01 pm |
UPDATE ON SWANNY
Check out Don Jnr’s latest bulletin on our Old Mate. Go to the Neil ‘Swanny’ Swanson Blog Page.
Jack Madron // January 4, 2009 at 7:30 pm |
John.
Tis our fault. If we didn’t interfere in 1946-47, with a bit of luck they would have wiped each other out.
Jack Madron // January 4, 2009 at 7:34 pm |
Del Boy is opening a stall outside the gates of Downing Street. Called, Shoes R Us.
JT // January 5, 2009 at 1:22 pm |
Jack
Del boy “but odd shoes are the new fashion Gov” “go on then a quid each if you take three shoes” “that’s three for the price of two innit?
“Yes madam the pong will go in a day or two”
JT // January 5, 2009 at 7:15 pm |
Reported in press today that the Izzies are using phosphorous ammo in civilian areas. I just cannot believe they would be so bloody stupid.
But typical headlines. “It has been reported that” No waiting for confirmation, but the smelly lot (Lefty Libs with dodgy underwear – that’s the women by the way) will remember this and quote as gospel truth for ever.
Spokesman for Hammas said today “Years without Electricity, Water, Food”
Izzy officer said today they have discovered warehouses stuffed with food and medicine which Hammas were selling to the population for profit. Also ammo dump under Hospital. One day the truth might emerge
Bill – I am now drinking Chilean Red from Tesco for Half a Crown a bottle. I mean bottel.
Derek Lovemore #22935157 // January 5, 2009 at 11:49 pm |
SWANNY
Reading between the lines of Donald’s bulletin – cheps – I doubt that our ‘Ole Mate is in much of a position to write or talk for a while. However, there’s naught to prevent him reading.
Suggestion: A series of Good Wishes and Get Well comments on the Neil ‘Swanny’ Swanson Blog will show him that we’re all thinking of him.
Jack Madron // January 6, 2009 at 11:42 pm |
John.
Browsing back through W&W, I may have made a mistake on March 21st last. I said that the name of the hurricane was Hilda. I believe the name was Hazel. There was another hurricane called Hilda. Reason I recall this is because my old Mum was called Hilda and we used to aggravate her ’cause sometimes she would storm through the house just like a hurricane, but more dangerous. God bless her.
JT // January 7, 2009 at 12:58 pm |
Jack
Well thank goodness we have cleared that hurricane name up. Now we can sleep at night. You shouldn’t fret about these things Jack. You’ll get wrinkles.
JT // January 7, 2009 at 12:59 pm |
Talking about wrinkles. er no forget it.
JT // January 7, 2009 at 6:36 pm |
Bloody Unbelievable is right
Yesterday news reports.
School hit by Izzie Tank fire 40 killed
School hit by Izzie Gunship 60 killed
School hit by Izzie Artillery
UN Rep (lying prick) says school only had refugees taking shelter.
Izzies said that their troops were taking fire from school
Today Izzies report absolute evidence that they were fired on from the school (s) and 2 Hamas leaders were killed inside school.
Bloody Meeja reporting crap before facts are available.
Pally spokesman says whats all the fuss ? Hamas are only firing home made rockets made from drain pipes. (like the little rockets we used to but fireworks night?)
Izzies say Iran now supplying proper missiles with longer range.
Jack is dead right we should have let all these f..kers fight it out in 1948
JT // January 7, 2009 at 6:40 pm |
Derek
What’s this about some chilli cracker woman setting fire to her hubbies penis while he was asleep. This in Adelaide?
Can’t you Ozzies educate your immigrants ? It’s not good manners is it ?
JT // January 7, 2009 at 6:44 pm |
Derek
Did she build a little fire with kindling and some sticks? (traditional bush craft). Or use a blowlamp? Or petrol?
Well don’t know about you lot but I am going to get asbestos lining in my PJ’s. These ideas catch on quick.
JT // January 7, 2009 at 6:49 pm |
Jack
As a fellow “bay window owner” are you ever curious about you know what underneath? The wife has a full length mirror but I don’t like to look.
JT // January 7, 2009 at 7:16 pm |
Anyone heard from Bunty?
Jack Madron // January 7, 2009 at 11:18 pm |
No John.
I don’t worry what’s under bay window. Obsolete now, like the old vickers. Wonder what Fluffy will make of that. What’s the weather like up your way? Penzance was – 6.2 last night. Bloody cold.
I see on TV news that Hamas are being supplied by Iran. Izzies are supplied by Yanks. Trouble is, number of Izzies killed today by friendly fire. One of their own tanks. Shown how by Yanks? Once again the innocent on both sides suffer.
JT // January 9, 2009 at 9:29 am |
Jack
Obsolete? Have you tried some oil and a cleaning rod with 4 x 2 (did you use 4 x 2 with the cleaning rod for the Vickers?) Or perhaps a Lee Enfield pull -through might help, talk to the MO first though. I must confess I have not tried any of the above on myself.
All is not lost though in that department. I am now fantasising about Aunt Matilda (Lord Snootie’s aunt in the Beano). I think I got a tingle recently.
JT // January 10, 2009 at 11:54 pm |
Lots of protests and rallies today supporting Pallies. Quite right too. If the Welsh were sending rockets into London every day we wouldn’t really mind, it’s their culture innit?
It is comforting that even in Benin, Africa voodoo priests also joined in the protests and sacrificed a cockerel, cutting it’s throat and sprinkling its blood on the ground. Signs of progress then, these guys in Africa normally use human babies.
JT // January 11, 2009 at 6:24 pm |
London Stop the War lot
Marxist lot
CND Lot
Ken Livingstone (little commie prick) plus various Muslim outfits
Why Oh Why are we such a PC cowardly country? Where were you yesterday when London needed you and your trusty Vickers Jack? It’s a bloody disgrace.
JT // January 12, 2009 at 7:41 pm |
I think little Ginger Knob is a bit thick and shows off.
Jack Madron // January 12, 2009 at 10:13 pm |
Hi John.
Ginger Knob is completely thick, but Gordon thinks he’s a role model.
Do you have “Notify me of follow up comments via email” on your Leave a Comment space? Don’t know what’s going on.
ED: Now I can see the references that you are concerned about Jack. Appear also on mine. Just ignore ‘em
Editor // January 12, 2009 at 10:48 pm |
Jack
I’ve investigated those references further and advise that it is beyond my ‘editorial’ control option to delete. I can say that as ‘editor/author’ (which requires a User/Password sign on) I’m offered a different reference “You are the author of this post”.
Alternatively, if I post without logging on (but, as a registered user), I get the identical message to which you refer. Tick the box ‘Ole Mate and hang on to your safety catch to see what happens!
Derek Lovemore #22935157 // January 12, 2009 at 11:21 pm |
TEST FOLLOW UP
Well Jack, thus far – SFA – to report. The TESTTESTTEST comment offers no facility to ‘thread’ a response – so maybe when I click to post this follow up, my balls will explode!
Aha!! Now I’m getting “Manage your Subscriptions” – so here goes!!
So…. What I get is a window that advises me that I need to obtain a “Valid Key”. All this gobbledegook is telling me that the ‘public subscriber’ (i.e. one who is not registered) can’t advantage the ‘options’.
Solutions: (1) Ignore, as previously advised, (2) Go through the Registration process (as described in 2008 – ref Avatars etc) and maybe a whole new world will open!!
Jack Madron // January 13, 2009 at 12:16 am |
Ed.
I think I’ll just ignore it.
ED: Jack. Your reply has registered at my end – twofold!
Copy A – As is normal with ALL comments – my Editor status receives all comments
Copy B – New feature ‘cos I ticked the appropriate box for a reply advice. Same copy of message above.
Agreed – just ignore!
JT // January 13, 2009 at 6:44 pm |
‘Tis a mystery. It is obvious that this blog is being monitored by the Russians, Americans, Chinese or Dickheads in the Brit Government, possibly everyone. I suggest we use Morse Code for a bit. Can’t be the Oz Intelligence services (contradiction in terms)
Its all Bill’s fault as he was in Korea. They have been tracking him ever since. They know that Korean vets are a Bolshie lot. But think though, maybe it’s the British Legion Bill was very rude about them. So why are they picking on Jack?
Jack are YOU the weakest link?
JT // January 13, 2009 at 6:47 pm |
…—…
JT Signaller Course Catterick 1953 // January 13, 2009 at 7:03 pm |
…. ..
JT // January 13, 2009 at 7:16 pm |
Jack
I have taken advice re your problem. Put your computer in the washing machine – 40 degrees but go easy on the powder and NO FABRIC SOFTENER. If you don’t have domestic washing machines in Cornwall yet there is a Laundrette in Penzance. Good Luck.
Captain Beaky // January 13, 2009 at 7:23 pm |
Editor
You have a security leak. Suggest you go to DEFCON 2. Prepare to launch the kayak for Special operations off Cornish coast.
Trust no one
JT // January 13, 2009 at 7:26 pm |
Capt Beaky
Thats a larf – no way that Kayak will float. Anyway who the f..k are you?
Were you a National Service junior hossifer?
Jack Madron // January 14, 2009 at 2:03 pm |
JT.
The way I’m feeling at the moment, with this cold, I am the weakest link. …—…
Morse. Wasn’t he on telly some time back? As for washing machines. We just beat the clothes on the rocks down on the seashore. No powder or softener. They’re for namby pambies only.
Jack Madron // January 14, 2009 at 3:29 pm |
Should be …- – - …
Jack Madron // January 14, 2009 at 5:35 pm |
Hi all.
Hoping to get another ex DCLI. MMGunner to join us. I have been in e mail contact with this gentleman in BC Canada and have told him of our blog sites. Fingers crossed.
Editor // January 14, 2009 at 11:10 pm |
FUCKING TYPICAL!
Can you believe this medieval crap from a so called Leader of a Middle Eastern Arab State?
“Sow the seeds of Arab and Islam extremism!” Where’s this fucker been for the past 40 years? And – Hello – France, UN among others will broker a Peace – fat fucking chance. The ‘Royal Standbacks’ – all of ‘em – especially France, last into battle and first out.
Hamas is claiming ‘victory’ with its cities in ruins and 1,000 dead and (now) diminishing rocket launches into Israel. Isn’t this what the Israelis have been prosecuting from the beginning?
Armageddon can’t be far away now!
JT // January 15, 2009 at 3:54 pm |
UN HQ shelled. Everyone jumps on the bandwagon, e.g Brown condemning IDF who deny.
When it will be discovered that Hams planted the explosive as is likely, no one will withdraw the allegations. Ditto UN schools allegedly wired for explosions by Hammas. UN are generally assholes just like in Bosnia and Serbia doing f..k all except confuse everyone.
JT // January 15, 2009 at 6:14 pm |
Carbon Emissions, Global warming, Greenpeace. Bollocks!
Greens should be boiled in salted water.
JT // January 15, 2009 at 7:41 pm |
Jack
Get a grip laddie, it’s only a cold.
By the way have you ever tried these Yankee whiskies – Jack Daniels etc; I haven’t but might try it.
Jack Madron // January 15, 2009 at 9:19 pm |
Yes John.
Only a cold. By the way. Don’t let the Confederates hear you saying that Jack Daniels is Yankee whisky. Dixie, born and bred. I have tried it but can’t comment on the stuff as I’m not a lover of whiskies.
Jack Madron // January 15, 2009 at 11:38 pm |
Must admit. I am partial to a drop or two of BAILEY’S Original Irish Cream.
JT // January 16, 2009 at 4:59 pm |
Jack
Goddamn, dead right. What a blunder about JD. Was that a good ole Southern boy who landed a plane on the Hudson.
Jack Madron // January 16, 2009 at 5:16 pm |
John.
Union or Johnny Reb, he sure was a bloody good pilot. That’s what I call cool, calm and collected. Hats off to the rest of the crew, as well.
JT // January 16, 2009 at 9:29 pm |
Jack
Bill Bryson when walking the Appalachian Trail described some good ol boys in West Virginia as the” product of many generations of profoundly un -biblical sex”
Ed can you put up You Tube “Dueling Banjos” please. Clip from THAT MOVIE?
ED: Done JT – see your next comment
JT // January 16, 2009 at 10:00 pm |
Deliverance?
Jack Madron // January 16, 2009 at 10:25 pm |
Deja-vu? W&W.
JT // January 17, 2009 at 8:00 pm |
Jack – deja-vu?
Hope this isn’t the unbiblical sex memory.
JT // January 17, 2009 at 8:00 pm |
Thanks Ed
Jack Madron // January 17, 2009 at 8:55 pm |
John.
Isn’t it frog for, we’ve had this before? Not into strange lingos. Takes me all my time with English.
JT // January 17, 2009 at 9:46 pm |
Jack
Yes that’s what it means – so I wondered whether it was the un biblical sex you were remembering rather than your time with the “Turnips” western music group?
JT // January 18, 2009 at 7:39 pm |
Everyone
This story about soldiers in Basra (of several ranks) biting the heads of chickens and justifying it as “training” for f..ks sake. What a load of absolute crap. What a lot of numbskulls. I AM ASHAMED OF THEM. Makes them hard men? Bullshit.
My Grandma kept chickens and killed them by wringing their necks. I am trying to imagine her biting their heads off and what possible reason she could have for doing so.
These dickheads did it for fun.
Bollocks bollocks bollocks
JT // January 18, 2009 at 7:51 pm |
After all these guys are hardly Special Forces are they? Hardly about to be behind enemy lines with no sharp weapons and no hands? So they have to bite a chickens head off. They are sitting in Basra airport while the Yanks are backing up the Local forces.
JT // January 20, 2009 at 12:09 am |
Jack
Sounds a bit like Zombies in Jamaica. Was biting heads off chickens part of your training?
Didn’t notice anyone in “A ” Coy doing it. but they did lots of funny stuff when in their drink. Ask Swanny – Swanny did you bite chickens heads off? If not why not?
Jack Madron // January 20, 2009 at 12:44 pm |
John.
Never did anything like that. We did raid farms in Germany when on manoeuvres, for already dead produce, like hams and things. We got up to lots of things that would be jumped on today but never that bad. Are our troops trying to copy the Yanks? That’s the sort of thing they usually do. You know, Rambo style.
Jack Madron // January 20, 2009 at 2:12 pm |
John.
Re deja-vu. What I was trying to say, in a roundabout manner was, we’ve had the banjo pluckers on before. I think it was on W&W somewhere. Still, nice to have it again.
Looking forward to seeing Bill’s new photo, in his Mess Uniform.
JT // January 21, 2009 at 8:08 pm |
The Izzies are admitting using white phos for smoke in civvy areas. Sorry this loses my vote. Dickheads. They should have taken more casualties rather than do this.
Jack Madron // January 21, 2009 at 11:54 pm |
John.
What do you think of Bill in his Mess Uniform? Quite smart I think. Once an LI man. Always an LI man.
ED: Too right Jack. Not bad for an old bloke. Mind you I noticed he chopped his boots off – maybe forgotten how to bull ‘em! I’ll be checking him out in June when I get there – Editor’s Muster Parade!
Editor // January 22, 2009 at 9:05 am |
EDITOR’S MUSTER PARADE
Nah then you ‘orrible lot! Stand by yer beds and prepare for the visiting Corp from Dahn Undah!
Standing Orders for June/July 2009
1.) Late May: Liaison with Pay Sergeant in London to make sure all back pay is up to scratch.
2.) Early June: Verification that the Poison Dwarf is really an ex CSM living in Eardisley and really does fit into his 1970’s kit.
3.) Mid June: Grand Meeting of all Bloggers, Bullshitters, and Coal Hole squaddies in Penzance. All expected to attend from far and wide.
4.) Anytime: Brissol and Taunton NCO’s of dubious parentage to report on Meeting times.
5.) Late June: LI Annual gathering at Shrewsbury in best BD and gaiters.
No excuses – all leave cancelled forthwith.
JT // January 22, 2009 at 5:50 pm |
Blimey
Get bulling your kit lads and don’t turn up short of kit like the Z Reservists for their 2 weeks annual training or never mind back pay you’ll be paying the Pay Sgt.
JT // January 22, 2009 at 5:54 pm |
Coincidence ?
I have just acquired several sets of 1954 webbing, ammo boots, drawers cellular, puttees and hosetops.
Start saving your pensions.
JT // January 22, 2009 at 6:36 pm |
Jack
Where is the picture of Lofty ?
JT // January 22, 2009 at 6:39 pm |
Talking about Spam reminded me. I picked up a can at Tescos yesterday. It was luverly. Haversack rations de luxe.
Jack Madron // January 22, 2009 at 7:42 pm |
John.
On R&R.
I’ve forgotten how to put on putties. Can we go on a course or something?
Editor // January 22, 2009 at 10:09 pm |
EDITOR’S UK TRIP UPDATE
Well – cheps – things are moving along! It would appear that JT and I are meeting in London on my arrival on Sunday 31st May and we might later also – in early June – meet again with the Penzance Lads at a (yet to be organised) Bloggers Banquet. Bill Griffiths and I will probably have a beer or two in Hereford around 5th June.
Dates need to be targetted to suit us all, allowing for the established fact that the LI/Rifles Event is set in concrete for 19th-21st June at Shrewsbury and some (like me) might be attending there.
As a suggestion, I propose that a time window from Monday 8th – Friday 12th June be allocated a suitable possibility to gather together as many Penzance DCLI ‘Old Mates’ who would be likely to attend. These dates bracket the Branch Meeting – see PS below.
Can one kindly soul do what Swanny would normally do (and let’s not interfere with his recuperation) and inquire for a suitable local pub that will accommodate us for an evening? At some stage the host pub will require a firm booking and numbers, so let’s be mindful of these logistics!
On the other hand, if a West Cornwall Association Meeting is on, we could attend then and arrange additional local lunches on fringe days while we ‘foreigners’ stay awhile to enjoy the Cornish ambience.
PS: Have now verified that Tuesday 9th June is the date for the monthly Heamoor gathering of the West Cornwall DCLI Association Branch. Terry Joll has been most helpful in providing details of this and the Annual Rifles gathering on 19th – 21st June at Shrewsbury.
Accordingly I have allocated the week of 7th June – 12th June (flexible) to stay over in Penzance to check out the booze and the birds – not necessarily in that order. Would any of you kind cheps care to organise some local meetings and gatherings? I shall also attempt to get Johnny Griffin and Graham Bradshaw – and who knows – maybe Joe Knight to join us! Any help and positive input will be appreciated. JT has been advised also and maybe we can get Bill Griffiths to travel down too.
Jack Rumfitt // January 23, 2009 at 1:43 pm |
Hi Bill Griffiths, loved your joke about Sally, I had a good laugh at that.
Jack Rumfitt
Jack Madron // January 23, 2009 at 4:34 pm |
Hi Ed.
I’m not very good at organising things (never got on committees and such) but am willing to do my little bit. If you let me know what you have in mind, like meal in a pub or whatever, I will try and sort something out. Looking forward to June.
JT // January 23, 2009 at 7:09 pm |
Jack
As it looks as you are the organiser – can we visit the Penzance lap dancing emporium? If so make sure that everyone brings their blood pressure tablet and have a medic on hand.
Also do you have any gels from Lap land locally or do they have to travel?
JT // January 23, 2009 at 7:12 pm |
Jack
You might consider Pole Dancing there lots of Polish girls around. But maybe not so many in Cornwall. Try Newquay though.
JT // January 23, 2009 at 7:18 pm |
Jack
Don’t try a Cornish Floral Dances scam starring Miss Mousehole 1959 at the Legion with pasties to follow. Remember Ed is coming from afar and we must give a good impression. Check it out with Swanny
Editor // January 23, 2009 at 9:42 pm |
BLOGGERS BANQUET JUNE 10TH (PROPOSED)
OK – summarising replies (of various content – direct emails and blogs) – it might appear that this above date would suit to muster us all in one place. The Heamoor Branch gathering (on Tuesday 9th) does not include a ‘Dinner’ per se – but does of course offer the opportunity for foreign visitors to pay respects and meet some Old Mates.
So, Jack and “S” (Support) team, how about a pencilled in booking (for Wed 10th) at the Heamoor location (seeing that they’re used to DCLI squaddies), plus it’s location will be known to local lads – and inspect the meal facilities? An A La Carte menu might be the preference – as numbers will be an unknown factor – until we get closer to the date.
If other weekly festivities (e.g. shoveha’pny, 10 pin bowling, cribbage, darts, mackerel fishing etc) can bracket this evening event and some/all of we foreigners are in Town for that week, there appears to be opportunities for random meets and lunches and tit inspections. Presumably, sufficient vehicles will be available to convoy us all around?
Also Jack – can you inquire for local accommodation options for Old Soldiers (not too many stairs!!) and buxom wenches at the bar!
PS: BODY COUNT!
Presumed/Hoped Attendees
Editor
JT
Swanny
Jack Madron
Barry Cornish
Bill Griffiths
Terry Simons
Johnny Griffin
Graham Bradshaw
Dutch Hoon
Joe Knight
Terry Joll
Trevor Webb
Roy Morris
To be advised if phoning:
Keith Mannings
Dave Beck
Jim Kelly
PS: Update 27th January 2009
Have today snailmailed off a letter to Roy Westbrook and Keith Mannings, that followed an earlier missive to Johnny Griffin, about the Blogger Week in Penzance. This activity will hopefully rope in Graham Bradshaw and Dutch Hoon (whom I shall also email). Joe Knight has been advised by email.
Keep it going lads
Terry Joll // January 24, 2009 at 3:56 pm |
Thanks for your emails Dave. (ED: Terry means Derek). I will of course speak at the February meeting of the West Cornwall Branch and put the idea forward of having you Bermudians come along, I will also speak ref a Buffet Supper, They usually go along with my proposals.
To all you chaps out there looking in remember that you are welcome to join any branch of the Associations and more than welcome to go to Shrewsbury on our coach which leaves from Penzance. If anyone wants further info give me a PM.
Terry
Jack Madron // January 24, 2009 at 4:46 pm |
Terry.
I’m interested in the Shrewsbury trip. I’ll have a yarn with you about it at the Feb meeting.
Jack.
JT // January 24, 2009 at 5:26 pm |
I don’t know who Dave is either. Don’t know who Terry is either. I think I am losing my grip on reality. Beam me up Jack have I been missing?
ED: JT, check DCLI blog. Jack has mustered additional “S” Company support from Canada. Appears we now have Brasso01 & Blanco01 to spread the MMG bulllshit thicker on the ground.
Terry Joll // January 24, 2009 at 7:16 pm |
To JT.
You do not know who Terry is. Your education is sadly lacking. You have obviously not had the great pleasure of meeting him yet, once met never forgotten.
Terry
ED: Think I’d better formally introduce you two cheps. JT, Terry Joll’s photo appears in several of the pix submitted by Swanny. (The chep with the half decent moustache in Rogues Gallery) and a legend in the DCLI & SCLI (after our time) and steering Member of DCLI Associations.
Terry, JT is former Pay Sergeant of Prospect Garrison in ‘54-’55 and has a formidable reputation with good looking nurses.
Terry Joll // January 24, 2009 at 7:22 pm |
To Jack Madron
Yes, by the meeting I hope to have some more details, May I respectfully suggest that you join the Truro Branch, this will then get you all bump that is available but it will cost you £3 per year. Shrewsbury is well worth it. I think Reg N is going this year.
Terry
Bill Griffiths // January 24, 2009 at 7:54 pm |
Hi Guys,
Looks like things are hotting up a bit for the proposed meeting in June, and now that Nancy is in full time care, I am certain that I will be able to make it, probably just to stay down for one night, possibly two, depending on how things work out when all final arrangements are in place, and I really look forward to meeting you all. The way numbers are going, we might end up with a Company strength. Can’t find my belt and gaiters, can I come in my old Mess Kit?
Bill
ED: Yes Bill, now that you have cleaned your shoes. Check out amended photo on ROR – cheps – the Sgnt Major has increased his height!
Jack Madron // January 24, 2009 at 11:42 pm |
Ed.
The MMG’s will Stand Easy for the foreseeable future as A Coy have their Stick Orderly on sick leave at the moment and several others seem to be AWOL.
ED: Right ’nuff Jack! Swanny seems to be home for good now. Give him time to bull his kit and pull the community nursing staff into line and he’ll be back to normal in no time. Then watch out. It’ll be marbles/tiddlywinks at dawn in June – “A” Coy v “S” Coy
Jack Madron // January 25, 2009 at 12:01 am |
JT.
So Harry has split with Chelsea. I bet she split with him ’cause she was fed up with him playing at soldiers. All chopper pilots have to have 20-20 vision. The long streak of **** is allowed to wear his glasses. Of course, this is not favouritism. Didn’t he get into Uni when somebody else did his paintings? Artist? More like piss artist.
Dave Hutchinson // January 25, 2009 at 6:32 am |
Just found my way in here and the bull keeps flowing. We can’t let those guys keep talking about us like that Jack. What’s all this Blanco Brasso thing they are on about ha ha. Anyways I’m off to bed – its late here and bloody cold minus 25 tonight. I will be back.
ED: That’s cold enough to freeze brass balls Dave! 28C plus 97% humidity in Brisbane – hot and sweaty.
JT // January 25, 2009 at 1:16 pm |
Jack
I thought pilots had to do things like navigate, work out clever stuff. (Count up to 99?). Ginger Knob failed all his school exams except Art and Plasticene and Beads. Just come back from his well deserved 6th holiday.
Give the lad a go cheps (as Ed would say)
JT // January 25, 2009 at 1:20 pm |
Sorry folks I keep forgetting that we have 3 blogs and just switch between the 2.
JT // January 25, 2009 at 3:14 pm |
Reading the financial page of the Beano it is reported that Lord Snooty is implicated in the latest scandal to hit the Upper House – taking bribes. This follows recent accusation of child abuse by keeping the Twins in romper suits for nearly 70 years. The posh peer noted for his now some what outmoded dress of shiny topper and spats declined to comment.
Bring back Big Eggo I say.
We will ask Jack who reads the rather down-market Dandy (and Hotspur) to report to the blog his analysis of the news from those publications.
Jack Madron // January 25, 2009 at 4:15 pm |
John.
Everything is just Dandy at Tottenham Hotspur. They lost again yesterday. To be expected when the Del boy of football is in charge. Isn’t it arry?
JT // January 25, 2009 at 4:16 pm |
Dave
The low temperature reported suggests you might live near Catterick. Yorkshire.
JT // January 25, 2009 at 4:18 pm |
I lived for a while ‘96-’97 in the Okenagen Valley BC via New Brunswick, Vancouver.
JT // January 25, 2009 at 4:20 pm |
How the f..k did that smiley get there? Jack I am being spammed.
ED: Smiley banished to -25C. Spamming appears to be cornered by Jack. Dunno why!
JT // January 25, 2009 at 4:21 pm |
Jack
Brilliant you should write clues to cryptic crosswords. Not craptic crisswords
Social Secretary // January 25, 2009 at 5:12 pm |
Dave
With that temperature – when you said you were going to bed – what month do you plan to wake up? Also does your missus chew caribou skins to make your shoes. What about her teeth?You can see we are very curious to find out all about you, all in strictest confidence.
ED: Dave, the appearance – from time to time – of comments with curious ‘nom de plumes’ – is a regular feature of these military blogs. For reasons known only to MI5, the identity is concealed! (except to Editor).
JT // January 25, 2009 at 6:29 pm |
Jack
Today I was unwisely trying to peer beneath the “Bay Window” just to check on something (don’t ask) and I toppled forward and banged my head on the wall.
Have you ever done this or do you rely on the wife to confirm that all is well down there
Social Secretary // January 25, 2009 at 6:57 pm |
Dave
Should explain that my questions as Soc Sec although may seem a little odd are actually quite important. For example the question about a wife’s teeth would be important in menu planning if ever we have a Ladies Night. (unlikely) (shudder) e.g. Should we provide in your case some blubber for her to gum. Most of our members remember are in their 70’s and a denture count would be high.
We know for example that when planning food service, Jack Madron and John because of what they call their “Bay Windows” really need large bibs (and some floor covering). This will be one of the factors when planning the proposed do in Penzance this year. This is in June and I perfectly understand that your awakening from hibernation (late) might prevent you from attending.
Apologies must close. Nurse in bringing my medication. (and chocolate biccies)
John Tenniswood // January 25, 2009 at 7:10 pm |
Ed
Great isn’t it? More members from Jack’s lot. He is on a Jamaica Recruiting drive. (Privates of the Carribbean and Sgts and Cpls and WO1’s Bless ‘em all). Good man. I wonder how many look in now.
Jack. Interesting about possible trace of Pedlar Palmer, can we explore further?
ED: Wot’s this Pedlar repartee – cheps? Are you guys exchanging Morse Code or SMS messages that we Antipodeans know nuthin abaht?
Bill Griffiths // January 25, 2009 at 7:23 pm |
Hi JT
Saw your note to Jack asking about looking under the bay window. What about a mirror tied to the end of a big stick? Is it right the Scots NCOs used them to check if the lads were wearing anything under their kilts?
Or was it the WRACs?
Bill
JT // January 25, 2009 at 9:00 pm |
Bill
Thanks for that advice. I’ll certainly try it next time. Don’t mention the Jocks though. That bloody Jock Strap ex Black Watch might come back. We can only hope that soon the lambing season will start and tempt him back to the Highlands and unnatural practices.
JT // January 25, 2009 at 9:09 pm |
Bill
Couldn’t wait, just tried your method wish I hadn’t bothered really. Thanks anyway. Also the spaniel ran away with the stick – now there are wood bits all over the carpet and I apparently have 7 years bad luck (I should be so lucky)
Are you taking notes Jack?
Jack Madron // January 25, 2009 at 10:36 pm |
Yes John.
Trying hard to keep up with all the blogs. About Pedlar Palmer. There was that piece I found on LI Assn blog from a woman who wanted to know if anybody remembered her Dad, known as Pedler Palmer in SCLI.
JT // January 25, 2009 at 11:26 pm |
Ed
Jack mentioned some time ago that he had been exploring cyber space (he means like me randomly pressing buttons to see what happens) and he mentioned on the blog that he found someone looking for a Pedlar Palmer SCLI. Jack has an e mail address.
ED: Yes – cheps – noted that comment some time back, but have done naught about it. Responses can sometimes pay dividends – that’s how the RSM Royffe trail was started of – by a fond grand daughter. I’ve got to be frank however, for each one that I answer, 20 get ignored. Makes you wonder why they email in initially!
JT // January 25, 2009 at 11:38 pm |
My what a long day we’ve had. Time you Ovaltinies went to beddie byes.
Night Night.
Jack Madron // January 25, 2009 at 11:53 pm |
John. Ed.
Looked up LI Assn blog again and found the query from a Debbie Palmer asking about if anybody remembers her dad Ian Palmer, known as Pedler (her spelling). I have the email address. Do I print it here?
ED: My preference Jack – No! However the referred address is in a public domain by Debbie’s choice and should anyone wish to make direct contact – let ‘em ask you.
Dave H // January 26, 2009 at 2:18 am |
Social Sec. Sometimes here I wish I could go to bed and wake up in May. Hibernation sounds like a plan, or maybe I will go live in Australia and chase the ‘roos around with ED.
ED: Good Idea Dave, convert to Islam, jump in a fucking Esky, land in Darwin and you’ll get a free house, social services, free medical and an Aussie flag to wipe your arse on!
Editor // January 26, 2009 at 11:12 am |
CARIBBEAN MATES BLOGGERS BANQUET WEEK 8th – 12th JUNE
G’Day – cheps!
I sense that the momentum is gathering for what will be (I hope) a Grand Event. I have just posted a message onto the BLI message boards (DCLI) to announce our intentions. I hope again that advance publicity will have our Old Mates flocking to attend.
Some liaison is essential, particularly with the Penzance group, as you are on the spot regarding intelligence for B&B accommodation etc. Bear in mind that all are pensioners and will prefer budget accommodation. Stretch your imagination lads and sus out caravan parks etc that might prove suitable.
Kindly also spread the word at the several Branch Meeetings that will occur before June. Also attempt contact by phone or snailmail, those lads not on the Internet or blog literate.
Thanks
JT // January 26, 2009 at 12:28 pm |
Alert
Newspaper reports today that Penzance has the biggest closure rates for pubs in UK. Better get back to the boozer Swanny your absence is buggering up the local economy.
JT // January 26, 2009 at 12:31 pm |
Dave H
Forget the ‘roo chasing with Ed. He gave this up when the wife found out.
Swanny Swanson // January 26, 2009 at 12:53 pm |
HI All. This is the first time I have seen this blog page and have enjoyed it very much, with all the captions. I had email from Derek and am delighted that he will be in UK in June, I only hope that I will be up to it. It will be brill to see him after all these years, also to meet JT and reminisce about our Bermuda experiences – i.e. Back Pay for coal fatigues?
Swanny.
JT // January 26, 2009 at 1:07 pm |
Morning Swanny welcome back to the Bullshit Brigade
JT // January 26, 2009 at 6:56 pm |
Ed
Well caravans might be OK for some. Bill would they get Hard Lying Allowance? Why not just give ‘em (rent ‘em) a spade and a poncho?
Me as Pay Sgt would expect at least a 5 star Hotel and a percentage of the poncho rental and if Bill (WO11) is wearing his Mess Dress there is no way he wants to be seen on a caravan site. Bill you might have to dress down and wear your shorts.
ED: Point taken JT, just egging the initiatives along. I know that Johnny Griffin spent some time in Penzance last year and enjoyed the local caravan facilities for a lengthy stay. Dunno what the options are in June (British Summer). I’m hoping that the local lads are considering all options to be advised for the troops.
JT // January 26, 2009 at 7:05 pm |
Can’t imagine that our Pedlar had a daughter he was as ***** as a fiddler’s bitch. (or made out he was). He was a tough guy no doubt.
Ed is that libellous? Better delete in case he really does have a daughter. Bet some in HQ Platoon (storemen) would remember.
But did you know that Pedlar was a nickname given to Palmers (sailmakers) in the Navy so hence anyone called Palmer was “Pedlar”
Editor // January 27, 2009 at 10:35 am |
BLOGGERS BANQUET WEEK [BBW]
Kindly note that a dedicated Blog Page for ALL and ONLY BBW related information and comment is now launched.
The idea is to contain only BBW related blog comments to assist with viewing all the collective ideas and notions – as they flow in – in one single place.
Jack Madron // January 27, 2009 at 3:55 pm |
John.
Your alert comment about pubs in PZ. I’ve just got back from town, been in for the pension. Bastards shut our local PO. I noticed lots of shops closing down, bloody place is getting like a ghost town.
Penzance. Well laid out. Don’t know how long it’s been dead, but it’s well laid out.
JT // January 27, 2009 at 9:14 pm |
Jack
Let me know if you see any tumbleweed blowing down the main street.
JT // January 27, 2009 at 9:17 pm |
Ed
Looks like we will have to take our own booze and haversack rations to Penzance.
ED: Dunno about caravan park accommodation – seems as if we’ll get a 5* hotel each. At least Monopoly with real properties is one game for the Agenda and we could use some of that Mickey Mouse money from Zim.
JT // January 27, 2009 at 9:20 pm |
P’raps we could buy some compo rations circa 1955. Trip down memory lane.
E Coley ex Cpl ACC // January 27, 2009 at 9:27 pm |
Hi guys
If you invite me to the do in Penzance I could do some 1954 army cooking for you. Nowadays they have stuff for the shits Immodium or something (or is that a brass band instrument)? Getting a bit confused like you lot.
PS: I don’t have blackheads or cold sores any more.
Social Secretary // January 27, 2009 at 9:46 pm |
Mr E Coley
Many thanks for your kind offer but frankly we hope for better catering facilities for our members some of whom still have bad dreams about army food in the early 50’s. We are delighted to learn that your skin problems have eased and hope that the Dhobi Itch is also improved with modern medication.
I agree that the earlier treatment you tried with Esso Blue paraffin would not be all that helpful. Still, science moved on we hope.
Discussing the latter problem with our legal department it appears that you might have a claim for compensation if as you say it was cause by starch in KD Shorts in Suez Canal Zone in 1952 but must caution that similar claims have been contested if it is suspected you did not wear unstarched underwear (Drawers Cellular). This advice is given without prejudice
JT // January 27, 2009 at 9:50 pm |
This blog gets barmier every day.
limostwanted // January 27, 2009 at 11:43 pm |
BLOWFISH BALLS BOWL OVER JAP DINERS
Now I’m convinced that Japs generally are fucking mad – so far as their obscene eating habits are concerned. Fuck Sushi – never again for me! Think I’ll try wichiti grubs – after all – 50,000 Abos can’t be wrong?
John T // January 27, 2009 at 11:57 pm |
Yummee
Wichiti Grubs (cold) for brekkie with HP Sauce.
Jack Madron // January 28, 2009 at 3:52 pm |
No HP Sauce John. You’ll only get it all over your laptop.
Jack Madron // January 28, 2009 at 5:04 pm |
Also, no tumblweed I think the air is too salty. OK for peanuts though.
Mr Jimmy Hirohito, Kobe, Nippon // January 28, 2009 at 5:51 pm |
Herro Brog
I read your sirry story about unfortunate browfish accident. I am opening chain of take aray retserurants speciarising in browfish borrocks. It is named Kamakazi Borrocks.
E Coley Ex Cpl Acc // January 28, 2009 at 5:54 pm |
Bloody Nips are getting in on the act.
John T // January 28, 2009 at 6:44 pm |
I think the Jap is having us on.
By the way as we cannot use the
N…word
F…word
C…word
Q…word
W..word
etc
Does this mean we can’t call the Jerries Huns or the Boche?
or the French Frogs? or Lawyers slimy bottom feeders?
John T // January 28, 2009 at 6:48 pm |
Jack and me are learning Morse Code so we can call for example a WOG a WOG in dots and dashes. And we can say Fuck if we want to in Morse.
Go on Jack show ‘em
JT // January 28, 2009 at 9:20 pm |
Ed
How many wichiti grubs do you need to feed 50,000 Abos? and if the poor little grubs weren’t being eaten what does a fully hatched Wichiti look like? Are adult Wichitis an endangered species? Can we get a picture?
ED: Just one fat one JT – can’t have ‘em indulging can we? have to leave room for their grog!
Jack Madron // January 29, 2009 at 12:07 am |
Didn’t Glen Campbell sing about them a few years ago?
WICHITA LINEMEN
ED: Very clever Jack!
Jack Madron // January 29, 2009 at 12:14 am |
John.
I don’t know about a dot, more like a full stop and as for dash, well that vanished years ago.
Jack Madron // January 29, 2009 at 12:30 am |
With all the TV coverage last week in Washington, there were Afro Americans, Anglo Americans and lots of others but I didn’t see or hear anything about Native Americans.
ED: Custer’s Last Comment: “Holy Mackerel – look at all them fucking Indians”
Jack Madron // January 29, 2009 at 4:32 pm |
Ed.
Seriously for a minute. John’s question about Wichiti grubs. What do they grow into?
JT, you’ve started something now. Old fogies asking about strange things in a far and distant land. Still, never too late to learn.
ED: Misspelling sorry! WITCHETTY GRUB Try Googling for more!
JT // January 29, 2009 at 10:11 pm |
Bloody Hell Jack, Everyone knows (except you) that they hatch into the great Australian Dingbat.
Ed, don’t get Jack Googling you know how he attracts Spams and things.
ED: Take no notice Jack, they’re just showing their ignorance. You and I know that baby witchetties become Aussie Cricketers and Rugby players.
JT // January 29, 2009 at 10:22 pm |
2 kids (boy and a girl) (mother’s a druggy) have been taken “into care”. The social workers have decreed that they are to be adopted by two Gays (blokes) – (I hate that word.) Despite the fact that the kid’s grandparents want them to live with them (Social c…ts say they are too old (40 something and 59). Straight couples have also been turned down in favour of the 2 wotsits
How the f…k did we get into this state? I despair.
Future at school “Hey Amanda which is your mum – the one with the beard or the one with the moustache and the nose piercing?”
JT // January 29, 2009 at 10:23 pm |
Roll on the Asteroid
Jack Madron // January 30, 2009 at 12:02 am |
John.
Asteroid. Is that a special cream for gays? and supplied as a roll on? All joking aside. Who in hell give these social services prats these jobs in the first place?
ED: Spammed Jack – t’other comment shot into orbit mate – lost forever!
PS: Retrieved Spam Jack -
“Don’t need to Google, John, to get spams.
Just sent another blog into space.”
Dave H // January 30, 2009 at 3:51 am |
What the hell is all this talk about grubs and dingbats, and Sushi – where did the MMG go? Ha Ha
ED: Welcome to Blogmania Dave (Pirate!) – you ain’t seen nuthin’ yet. Wait till Swanson gets back on deck!
JT // January 30, 2009 at 11:17 am |
Why no anti spam thingies? I got one.
ED: Yeah JT – but have YOU got Akismet? It detects even thoughts! Jack must be having some questionable ones!
JT // January 30, 2009 at 11:19 am |
Dave H
MMG’s OK. Go for it if you have to. But don’t mention stripping Vickers.
Jack Madron // January 30, 2009 at 12:55 pm |
MMG’s still here Dave. They can’t do without us.
All. Menu for today. Spam, fried in dingbat oil followed by cold witchetty grubs in HP sauce.
JT // January 30, 2009 at 1:43 pm |
Thanks Jack but following your advice no HP for me.
Terry Joll // January 30, 2009 at 2:54 pm |
For all those MMG Specialists;
In the Armoury at The Keep Bodmin you will find a very good condition Vickers Machine Gun on display.
A few kinds words to the Regimental Secretary may result in you being allowed to have a play with it. There is also a PIAT.
Rev B Maltravers Ex Chaplain RN // January 30, 2009 at 3:08 pm |
Terry
Do you have a special interest in Vicars like that rude Jack Madron ? ?
Jack Madron // January 30, 2009 at 3:47 pm |
Hi Terry.
Every time I go up to the Keep, I have to go and look and sometimes catch hold of that Vickers MG. Brings back a lot of good memories. Two taps left. Two taps right. Locks. Dial sight. OCMA. Dave will know what I’m talking about.
JT // January 30, 2009 at 4:44 pm |
Jack
Looks like your are still top of Fluffy’s Shit List
JT // January 30, 2009 at 4:51 pm |
Billy Boy
You on Muster Parade this morning?
JT // January 30, 2009 at 4:53 pm |
Jack
Why do you Keep going to the Keep ?
Jack Madron // January 30, 2009 at 5:08 pm |
John.
That’s a word I Keep hearing. Keep going. Keep up. Keep this. Keep that. Keep off the grass. So I just Keep trying. Keep up the banter.
Jack Madron // January 30, 2009 at 5:15 pm |
John.
Noticed that Terry said that French bird Edith was also at the Keep.
JT // January 30, 2009 at 5:59 pm |
Jack your computer clock is an hour fast unless you keep it on PMT (Penzance Mean Time)
Terry Joll // January 30, 2009 at 7:31 pm |
Hey, Reverend.
I am a Vicar. But I also tell porkies sometimes
Terry
JT // January 30, 2009 at 9:11 pm |
Jack
That French Bird -They say she kicks like a mule.
Rev B Maltravers Ex Chaplain RN // January 30, 2009 at 9:17 pm |
Hi Terry
Thank for replying dear. Sorry I can’t get to know you better at the moment. I am a bit entangled with the Verger who visits me be a lot for Bible lessons and Pilate at my place. He gets a bit jealous – silly cow.
Fluffy
JT // January 30, 2009 at 9:24 pm |
Jack
Bunty’s around – I saw her on her Face Book. She had pix of her at the nude bungie jumping championships in Peru.
God what a sight -78 years old and looks it.
Jack Madron // January 30, 2009 at 10:05 pm |
John.
That I would like to see. Come to a stop at the end of the rope but the 78 year old loose bits still carrying on. OMG.
Poor Terry. Come into the parlour. Said the spider —-.
Jack Madron // January 30, 2009 at 10:14 pm |
John.
Computer clock is correct. It’s this pissing around with the time twice a year.
JT // January 30, 2009 at 10:22 pm |
Can’t you can set the time to GMT or BST? But does it matter? At least you are going to bed early if on PMT.
Jack Madron // January 30, 2009 at 11:02 pm |
Nos Da Jowan. It’s now 22-01 Penzance Time.
Dave Hutchinson // January 31, 2009 at 4:00 am |
In the Armoury at The Keep Bodmin you will find on display, a very good condition Vickers Machine Gun.
Jack that must be one of the guns we took good care of like the rest of our gear
JT // January 31, 2009 at 1:06 pm |
Dave
Now then Dave, keep up laddie. Jack said that he plays with it a lot. Runs his fingers over it and taps it. (Don’t ask). Gets him out of house cleaning. Tell the wife he is still on army reserve. We normally don’t mention it in case that Vicar (Fluffy) pesters Jack again. Jack is hoping that The Rev is getting more interested in Terry.
Jack Madron // January 31, 2009 at 4:09 pm |
Dave.
Don’t rub it in to much, mate. Rifle Coys may get an inferiority complex. If they haven’t already got one.
John.
Don’t tell the Missus my little secret. KEEP it to yourself.
Jack Madron // January 31, 2009 at 4:18 pm |
John.
Have you seen the posh bus on Carib Re-Union Blog? I think the conductor looks very smart in his uniform.
JT // January 31, 2009 at 6:22 pm |
That’s what I thought Jack. Great minds think alike. Do I understand that the driver is Terry?
Jack Madron // January 31, 2009 at 10:57 pm |
Yes John.
Terry is the driver. Notice the armed guard on rear of bus? Wasn’t there last night when I saw it first. Can’t do without the MMGs.
JT // February 1, 2009 at 7:37 pm |
Dave H
Were you with Jack in BAOR and were you one of Lt Hodders men? It’s a sore point with me as Jack knows. I’ll tell you all about it when I know you better.
Jack Madron // February 1, 2009 at 8:02 pm |
Hi John.
Dave H and I have never met. He was in the MMGs in 1956. I left in ‘55 so he wasn’t a Lt Hodder man. I found Dave’s email address on another LI Guestbook. He had mentioned he had been in MMGs so I sent him an email. He knew our Pl Com, Lt Rowe and a couple of others who I also knew. It’s just gone on from there.
JT // February 3, 2009 at 9:22 pm |
Camden Borough Council (London) have today padlocked all the gated and fenced parks in the borough “Because snow might make the paths slippery” so kids can’t go in and make snowmen.
What a bloody Mickey Mouse World we live in.
JT // February 3, 2009 at 9:28 pm |
Job Vacancy (Guardian)
Childrens “Outreach” officer. Salary £120,000 plus car
JT // February 3, 2009 at 9:42 pm |
Jack, this job is made for you.
“Wanted experienced MMG operative to wipe out the fucking selected Pansy Liberal Green Marxist Working Party, CND plus anyone who went to Eton and the entire House of Lords. In other words (a true cross party cull.)( and bankers)” .
This is democracy lads.
Jack Madron // February 3, 2009 at 10:43 pm |
John.
I couldn’t agree with you more. It seems the whole bloody world is full of power hungry bastards who want to rule everybody else.
You mentioned about MMGs. If only we could, legally. What in hell is a “Outreach” officer. Anyhow? I think they make up these bloody jobs.
Jack Madron // February 3, 2009 at 10:57 pm |
Carol Thatcher in private, says that somebody’s hair style looks like a golliwog. Now she’s lost her job on The One Show. The spawn of the Wicked Witch of the West isn’t exactly my cup of tea, but bloody hell. What ever happened to freedom of speech?
JT // February 4, 2009 at 5:08 am |
Can we bring back the Multi Colored Minstrel Show?
Jack
Freedom is now an “f” word please don’t use it. use “f” of speech.
JT // February 4, 2009 at 5:15 am |
Northamptonshire
Head of Personalisation £86,000 pa
Dave H // February 4, 2009 at 11:38 pm |
Thanks for explaining to JT Jack, Hodder rings a bell though, but I can’t place him.
Jack Madron // February 5, 2009 at 12:09 am |
Hi Dave,
Tim Hodder was our platoon commander in Germany and when we got to Jamaica, he was promoted to Capt and went to Bermuda. Buggy Rowe took over the MMGs. Buggy was a good officer but Tim Hodder, to me, was better. JT didn’t think so. I’ll let him tell you the reason.
Dave H // February 5, 2009 at 3:47 am |
Buggy wanted me to be his batman, at one time, but I didn’t want to. What I remember he was a bit punch drunk – a boxer at one time somone mentioned and always wanted to spar with me ha ha. Remember him at times walking and punching away at nowt – lol – but he was well liked by our lot. JT must have upset him.
By the way Jack, wasn’t there an officer who drove around the camp in an MG, don’t know if he was there in your time. I can’t remember his name.
Bill Griffiths // February 5, 2009 at 10:08 am |
Jack,
I have a whole album of records of the “Black & White Minstrels”.
Do you think could lead to me being arrested, put in prison, and miss the Carribean re-union? or should I just cross out Black, and insert Coloured or destroy them?
Bill.
PS. Strange though, all the girls are white. It is only the guys that are Black, sorry, Coloured.
ED: Bill – see latest graphic posting to this blog page leader, showing your highly illegal LP record sleeve. Tut! Tut! Golly, Golly, Golly, Golly,
JT // February 5, 2009 at 11:57 am |
Golly is causing trouble again. Spotted in Queens little souvenir shop at Sandringham. Ed I sent you a picture.
ED: One BIG fucking Golly now published JT – see graphic in blog page leader
JT // February 5, 2009 at 12:01 pm |
Dave H
It was Lt later Capt Hodder who upset me. (A delicate matter of him wanting to shag my girl friend). It’s no laughing matter Jack.
Jack Madron // February 5, 2009 at 2:25 pm |
Dave.
Buggy was into boxing a lot. I wasn’t. Couldn’t see any sense in beating seven bells of crap out of each other for fun. He used to take part in all the boxing bouts in camp. There was another chap, I think he was in the Mortar Platoon, who used to box. I think his name was Pilley, was a L/Cpl I believe. Of course, Ivor Penhallagon was into this fisticuff lark as well. Bloody gluttons for punishment, if you ask me.
Don’t remember any officer driving around in an MG though. Do you remember Peter Michell, Mike Terry and Peitry, they were officers at Up Park Camp?
Jack Madron // February 5, 2009 at 2:27 pm |
John.
Would I laugh at a serious thing like that?
Jack Madron // February 5, 2009 at 2:47 pm |
Would Little Richard records be banned nowadays? Good Golly Miss Molly.
JT // February 5, 2009 at 3:03 pm |
Jack, Definitely not PC, also new bans for
Black
Black
Blackpool
Dark
Darker
Niggardly
Just be careful out there. Watch de mouf whitey yeah?
Dave Hutchinson // February 5, 2009 at 6:37 pm |
So you weren’t into sharing Eh? JT
Dave Hutchinson // February 5, 2009 at 6:38 pm |
I don’t remember those other names Jack, as for the MG must have been after you left
JT // February 5, 2009 at 10:20 pm |
Dave H
It was difficult enough to get your own leg over in those days let alone sharing.
Dave Hutchinson // February 6, 2009 at 1:00 am |
I know what you mean JT, – you were lucky to get a feel. Ha Ha
JT // February 6, 2009 at 10:55 am |
Dave H
Well a certain member of “A” Coy couldn’t even see those 2 black gals never mind feel them in his love nest in the coal store.
Blind Mans Bluff ?
Jack will do a pun. No names no pack drill.
Jack Madron // February 6, 2009 at 12:29 pm |
Can’t think of a pun, John but the words of a song comes to mind. To the tune of She Wore A Yellow Ribbon.
Down the hole digging coal.
Digging coal down the hole.
If it wasn’t for the Bevan Boys,
Who are far far away.
I don’t think Swanny had a scuttle with him that night. Maybe a scuffle though.
JT // February 6, 2009 at 8:12 pm |
Jack
Thank you. Very touching and romantic as always. But now Dave knows Swanny’s secret and all the Jamaica lot will want to know the details.
Jack Madron // February 6, 2009 at 8:29 pm |
John.
All the Jamaica lot? I think there are only three of us so far. Dave H, Myself and the Eds’ mate in Oz, John Goddard. Maybe the Sargasso Sea is more mysterious than we thought.
Dave Hutchinson // February 7, 2009 at 6:42 am |
Jack, I was just thinking of all the guys that were in the MMG platoon, where the hell are they all? Are they not into computers? Have you guys not met any of them when you go to the reunions? If you see them tell them to get their finger out and get on line here. OK rant over, I’m going to bed. lol.
Jack Madron // February 7, 2009 at 2:17 pm |
Dave.
I think that most, who are still with us, aren’t into computers. I’ve only been into these voodoo machines for about 18 months. Thanks to my daughter. Most of the chaps I knew were from Somerset or other parts of the country, so I’ve lost track of them and of two mates, one died a few years ago and the other, lives near St Austell, the other end of the county. We do meet up some times.
There is a chap from Camborne in our West Cornwall Assn, who was in MMGs in Jamaica. He joined about the time I was leaving in 55. I can’t place him in Jamaica but he told me he spent some time in Belize as well. His name is Allan Collins. He also disliked Sgt Naylor.
Terry Joll // February 7, 2009 at 4:52 pm |
I am in contact with Allen Collins. Was in Support Company but in later life was RP Staff.
Who remembers Cpl Delbridge? He was RP Cpl, was he in Bermuda?
Terry
Jack Madron // February 7, 2009 at 5:40 pm |
Terry.
I think Cpl Delbridge was in Jamaica. I know the name but I’m damned if I can remember what he looked like. My problem is if I remember the face I forget the name and vice-versa. Must be age or something.
JT // February 7, 2009 at 6:17 pm |
Dave
Don’t think many of our generation are into computers which is a shame. I think some are aware of the blogs through relatives and Ed gets some enquiries. Also some are put off because of Jack’s bad language (tee hee).
Start digging and Stand By for incoming MMG rounds.
JT // February 7, 2009 at 9:50 pm |
Hi Terry
I don’t remember a Cpl Delbridge in Bermuda.
Terry Joll // February 7, 2009 at 10:08 pm |
JT.
As he was an RP Cpl you would have remembered him, not for the best of reasons. I see him occasionally, he lives near Newquay.
Terry
Dave Hutchinson // February 7, 2009 at 10:55 pm |
Jack stop the swearing. JT said you are putting people off HA HA.
JT it is a pity our older generation isn’t into computers. I have spent many hours looking up stuff , and been theatened with divorce if I dont get off here sometimes, as she who must be obeyed isn’t into the Net.
Jack, I don’t know why SGT Naylor wasn’t liked, I had no problems with him and found him quite a fair SGT, but that’s just me. I know he liked to borrow $$$ from the guys at times and he used to have a Black Chick in his room overnight at times, but hey – what the hell Eh?
Dave Hutchinson // February 7, 2009 at 11:00 pm |
PS: Jack – that Alan Collins – have you a picture of him in ‘55 or ‘57, if he was there I should know him, but the name doesn’t ring a bell
Jack Madron // February 7, 2009 at 11:02 pm |
Terry.
I said earlier about names and faces. One of the photos on the Harold Royffe blog, the colour party in front of the Keep. Have you any idea who the soldier sitting to the left of Ron Delap is? He’s another face I know but damned if I can put a name to.
Jack Madron // February 7, 2009 at 11:17 pm |
Hi Dave.
If you go onto 1st DCLI Memorabilia, scroll down to my pix and the coloured photo near the end, taken at the Keep, Bodmin. Four of us from MMGs. L to R John (Dutchy) Holland. MM. Pl Sgt. Germany, Jamaica. My mate Bill Kelloway from St Austell. Me and Allan Collins. Alan is also in a couple of others of West Cornwall branch of LI Assn.
Jack Madron // February 7, 2009 at 11:19 pm |
Terry.
I haven’t been drinking. Honest, but I meant to say name. Not face.
ED: Error corrected Jack
Terry Joll // February 7, 2009 at 11:42 pm |
Jack,
More the pity you have not been drinking. Why Not. I am Teetotal but I do not mind others getting pissed around me. Yes, Allen Collins is a member of West Cornwall Branch.
Terry
JT // February 8, 2009 at 4:42 am |
Terry, I am not sure that there was an RP Cpl in Bermuda. Swanny or Derek might remember.
ED: No recall I regret. The only copper, whom I do remember was Charlie Seaborne (Sgnt) in the early 1954 days, before he was assigned to 3 Platoon. We had very few miscreants in the nick – Waster Greenslade and his mates were constantly on the piss, but I only ever recall one prisoner under scores of Quarter Guard Commanders that I carried out. (Was gunna say ‘mounted’ – but knowing the penchant for piss-taking thought I’d change the vocabulary!)
Jack Madron // February 8, 2009 at 2:34 pm |
Ed.
Glad you’re keeping your wits about you. Can’t be to careful, with this lot on here.
Terry Joll // February 8, 2009 at 5:28 pm |
Well it appears all you young innocent chaps were either very good boys or lucky not to have been caught.
Terry
JT // February 8, 2009 at 6:38 pm |
Terry
Seriously for once. You know a huge proportion of these soldiers were National Service men just out of basic training therefore only 18 when they arrived Bermuda (I was 19). Also (and I have often wondered about this) most were from such a local area of recruitment. Mostly Cornwall and Somerset etc so even the Senior NCO’s such as Jan Passmore had this sort of family authority. Their training was so different to my own basic training in the Royal Armoured Corps which was so much more impersonal.
This blog and planned reunion supports this. Just amazing Derek does not recall many many in Detention. I am not really surprised. A good bollocking from Jan Passmore with threats to tell their Mums would be enough.
JT // February 8, 2009 at 6:48 pm |
Swanny
I remember your story about Jan bollocking you for your “tank corps beret style” and your visits to his home in Bermuda for pasties. Lucky he didn’t check out the coal store very often?
JT // February 8, 2009 at 7:29 pm |
Dave H
Watch it laddie. ” Black Chic” is now seriously not PC. First of all Black is racist. Chick is sexist.
You could say B…..C…… but put the dots in or we will think you mean British Columbia and you Canucks have got to stop calling Native Canadians “Fuckin Injuns”
Where have you been Dave ?
PS: I saw Rolf Harris show in Kamloops BC in 1968 and on the same day bought Beatles Sgt Pepper album.
Terry Joll // February 8, 2009 at 7:36 pm |
Yes, The Regiment was a Family and I think it still is judging by the amount of members who still attend Reunions Fifty years down the line. I remember taking fellow Cornishmen home for tea at my Quarter in Osnabruck.
Terry
Jack Madron // February 8, 2009 at 8:36 pm |
John.
I thought a black chick was a young crow (fledgeling). With all this PC nowadays. What do we call our feathered songster, the Blackbird?
I was never invited to married quarters for tea. Maybe I should have stayed in a Rifle Coy. No, on second thoughts, I was in the best Coy.
Jack Madron // February 8, 2009 at 8:38 pm |
Rolf Harris? Beatles? What next?
JT // February 8, 2009 at 8:59 pm |
Jack
Swannys B***k girls in the coal store were in PC language Miner Birds.
Jack Madron // February 8, 2009 at 9:08 pm |
Very good. John. Would never thought of that.
Dave Hutchinson // February 9, 2009 at 5:57 am |
OOPS sorry JT, I slipped up there forgot myself lol. OK – is well tanned african Jamaican OK? Oh the memories of doing Town Patrol, will be dreaming tonight lol. I used to dream quite often some time back of being back in camp.
Dave Hutchinson // February 9, 2009 at 6:13 am |
What next Jack, well how about the Rolling stoned Stones.
JT what the hell were you doing in Kamloops? Well they are Fuckin Injuns” aren’t they? Well the ones I know do it, there are some who live over the road from me and they have 3 kids.
Swanny Swanson // February 9, 2009 at 12:54 pm |
JT. You mentioned Mockingbird in your comments – she was never ever near the coal shed, but spent time along with Monkey Face hanging around our billets steps on a regular basis – must have had servicing duties? I remember one night coming back to camp, looking through the window at the Bugle Section staying under our room when apparently the whole Bugle Section had all gone through the both of them during the evening. Don’t really know truth in that? but a lot of bragging was said about it by many!
Jack Madron // February 9, 2009 at 1:54 pm |
Dave.
Was the Hot Spot up at the Crossroads still there when you were at Up Park Camp? Had a few bottles of Red Stripe in there. Also memories of The China Doll, Bamboo Club and the Atlantic Beer Garden. There are others but I can’t remember names.
Rolling Stones. Beatles. No thank you. To me, music went down hill in the 60’s. Give me Buddy Holly. Ricky Nelson. Bill Haley. Lonny Donegan any day. A singer I’ve worked with, from your neck of the woods, is Gordy West. The Calgary Cowboy as he was known over here.
jt // February 9, 2009 at 2:19 pm |
Dave
Jack earlier mentioned Town Patrol They were rounding up pissed up Yankee sailors and handing them over to their Shore Patrol.
JT // February 9, 2009 at 2:28 pm |
Swanny
I never suggested that Mocking Bird was your guest in the Coal Store. Always assumed 2 lovely young girls. Course Mock might have been hiding in the dark, she did lurk in odd places.
I was having dinner with my girlfriend in the Little Venice restaurant and we were sitting near the window. Imagine my horror in seeing Mockingbird pinning some poor soul against an alley wall outside. No names, no pack drill
Jack Madron // February 9, 2009 at 2:47 pm |
John.
So they had restaurants in Bermuda. We had to put up with some hot patties on the way back to camp after a night on the Red Stripe. Of course, Cpls pay wouldn’t be enough for restaurants, anyhow.
JT // February 9, 2009 at 2:50 pm |
Dave
I spent a couple of years in Canada 1967/68. New Brunswick in the East, then Vancouver and Okanagen Valley BC (Osoyoos) went to Kamloops a few times.
JT // February 9, 2009 at 2:54 pm |
Jack
Well you used to call it the Holiday Isle and don’t forget the Local Overseas Allowance was pretty good and was based on American cost of living.
Jack Madron // February 9, 2009 at 3:35 pm |
Yes John. Forgot that.
Jack Madron // February 9, 2009 at 3:53 pm |
John. Dave.
Your chat about Canada reminds me of a song I used to sing, years ago. “Canadian Pacific”. Recorded by George Hamilton 4th and Hank Snow. Both Canadians, I believe.
JT // February 9, 2009 at 6:50 pm |
Jack
Crossed Canada by train Halifax to Vancouver. Not by “Canadian Pacific “Railway but Canadian National (CN)
Jack Madron // February 9, 2009 at 8:07 pm |
Canada. A place I’ve always fancied to visit. A bit late now I think but you never say never. The closest I got was Newfoundland, on the way home on demob. Somehow I don’t think I’d like the French speaking parts.
Dave H utchinson // February 9, 2009 at 11:44 pm |
Jack, if you are talking about Uncles Inn at the cross roads, yep it was there I think most of the guys stopped in there after a night of drinking and othe things I will not mention lol! Their patties were pretty good. Hey what overseas allowance? I never saw any.
JT, Osoyoos is hotter than hell in the summer, so they tell me , although I don’t live too far from there, I have not visited yet, only been in this neck of the woods for 3 years
Back to Jack. Hey man get yerself over here for a visit, do the cross country thing by train, friends of ours from the UK did it and loved it.
Jack Madron // February 10, 2009 at 12:05 am |
Dave.
Uncles Inn. Now that rings a bell but I think the Hot Spot was a different place. The only other place I remember at the Cross Roads is the Carib Cinema.
If the Boss or myself hit it big on the Lotto, I’ll definitely be over for a tour.
Jack Madron // February 10, 2009 at 12:29 am |
Dave.
Did you look up 1st DCLI Memorabilia? Alan Collins is the unnamed one in the group. I didn’t know his name until last year, when I rejoined the West Cornwall branch of the Association
Dave Hutchinson // February 10, 2009 at 5:31 am |
Jack, Uncles Inn was almost across the road from the Carib, it had a beer garden at the side of the place. I have pic of the Carib and of the entrance to the camp and some others if you are interested. Was going to ask you earlier if you had ever gone back over there. Mrs and I went back some 12 years ago, rented a car and toured the island. Wow things had changed – Cops everywhere with guns I even got a ticket for speeding – ha ha but I never paid it. Remember Negril, now its all built up with hotels. I think when we were there was only a cop station.
Oh I did look in the DCLI Memorabilia , but couldn’t spot Alan. Will look again in the morning.
Jack Madron // February 10, 2009 at 4:43 pm |
Just got back from a route march into town. Firstly. MO check for blood pressure. OK. Secondly. Barber parade. Now feeling light headed. Thirdly. Pay parade. PO now broke. Caught a bus home. Got to use the old bus pass while I got the chance to.
Dave.
Would like to see your photos please. Things probably look different to what I thought they looked like.
JT // February 10, 2009 at 6:37 pm |
Dave
I was manager of the Sahara Motel on Lake Osoyoos for a season. Bloody hot as you say, loads of rattle snakes around.
Where do you live?
JT // February 10, 2009 at 6:47 pm |
Swanny
Re Monkey Face – those buglers must have been either drunk or blind…
Jack Madron // February 10, 2009 at 11:43 pm |
Dave.
We had a LI Assn meeting tonight and I had a chat with Peter Michell who was a Lt in Jamaica.I enquired about the ossifer who had the MG.His name was Lt David Margets. Who – Peter said, was a miserable sod. He came from the Durhams, Korea.
Jack Madron // February 10, 2009 at 11:56 pm |
PS Dave. Peter also remembers Major Viner.
Dave Hutchinson // February 11, 2009 at 1:39 am |
Jack, It was Viner who took us on that march and the salt tablet thingy I told you about and we got so sic. Viner told us you finish this march or we come back and do it again tomorrow – the sod. The pictures I sent you with the email some time ago of us at the xmas party, did you know the Officer on the pic? Which platoon was Peter in – in Jamaica? Oh I have been trying to scan some photos to send you, but my scanner isn’t making the pictures bigger, its peeing me off bad, so will work on it later. Got to have my Tea – it’s tea time here, and I’m taking a sugar low.
Dave Hutchinson // February 11, 2009 at 5:30 am |
JT. I live about a 4 hr drive east of Osoyoos in Cranbrook. If im not being too nosey why did you leave Canada? My son works in an hotel in Banff Alberta – he is a food and beverage manager, he worked in the Banff Springs hotel for 12 years, he loves the work.
Jack Madron // February 11, 2009 at 12:35 pm |
Dave.
Peter was in a rifle coy in Jamaica. I don’t know which one. There was “B”. “C” and “D” Coys. I don’t know the officer in your photo. The only officers I remember in “S” Coy are Peter Rowe and Mike Terry who was in the Anti Tank Platoon.
Oh yes, Peter was also transfered to “A” Coy. Bermuda.
Do you remember a Cpl George Bolton. He was an RP Cpl? I’ve got a funny story about him in “A” Coy in Germany. I’ll tell it when I’ve got some time to spare.
Jack Madron // February 11, 2009 at 12:37 pm |
Peter Michell was transfered to Bermuda. Not Peter Rowe.
JT // February 11, 2009 at 1:08 pm |
Dave
I left Canada because wife No 1 (2 kids) would not come out to join me. But apart from that I had a very interesting time there. Worked for a while for Mafia family who ran the Penthouse Night Club in Vancouver. I was restaurant manager, having been in the business in UK.
JT // February 11, 2009 at 7:32 pm |
Jack and Dave
As a matter of interest – me being ex RAC – what weapons did anti tank platoon have?
JT // February 11, 2009 at 7:47 pm |
Who is the other guy in Canada? In Victoria? Own up and march in laddie.
Also Barry C – no show – you OK?
JT // February 11, 2009 at 8:08 pm |
Dave, Google Penthouse Club Vancouver. I worked for the Filipone family in this night club opened midnight til 5am. No liquor licence so punters arrived with their own booze and bought mixers and ice. Totally illegal. Cops got paid off at reception nightly. Dancing on 3 floors each with restaurant
girls. Gambling.
The family liked me because I was British (class said Mickie , a Frankie Laine lookalike who wore an purple dinner jacket with sequins.) They owned Sahara Resort Motel in Osoyoos. They sent me there to run it for a while. I think the previous managers remains are probably anchored in concrete at bottom of Lake Osoyoos, don’t ask they said, I didn’t. Happy days?
Jack Madron // February 11, 2009 at 8:10 pm |
John.
The Anti Tanks, if my memory is right, they had 17 pounders, although I vaguely remember them having something like a bazooka but bigger and on wheels with a towing eye on the end of the barrel. Can’t remember what this type of weapon was called. In Minden they had Oxford carriers but in Jamaica, according to a magazine Swanny loaned me, they had Universal carriers.
Jack Madron // February 11, 2009 at 8:17 pm |
John.
Barry is OK. Was at our LI meeting last night. He’s been away for some time. Up with his daughter. He’s become a grandad.
JT // February 11, 2009 at 8:17 pm |
Jack wot’s a towing eye? and while we are on subject of weapons. How does a flash eliminator work such as on a Bren? Anyone know?
ED: FLASH ELIMINATOR
PS: Also a large safety pin holding the halves of a raincoat together!
Jack Madron // February 11, 2009 at 8:56 pm |
John.
A towing eye is a metal ring that went over the hook on the tow bar. The flash eliminator, I believe was supposed to cut down the amount of flash from the muzzle but I’m not sure it worked.
Jack Madron // February 11, 2009 at 9:18 pm |
John.
The Vickers had a blast deflecter covering the Outer Casement Muzzle Attachment. All very technical. Without it we would have been seen for miles with all the dust being kicked up. I forgot that there was so much involved being a gunner. I think Rifle Coys had it cushy.
ED: Hard work that – sitting on yer arse on a carrier – while we Rifle Coy squaddies had to run up and down the beaches, shooting land crabs!
JT // February 11, 2009 at 10:22 pm |
Jack
Tiz true, I used to watch em running up and down on Warwick ranges while me and the girlfriend were relaxing in the dunes.
Terry Joll // February 12, 2009 at 12:16 am |
The Anti Tank Gun with a towing eye on the barrel was either a MOBAT, or a BAT. Later came the WOMBAT which was fired from within the Land Rover (I Think).
Jack Madron // February 12, 2009 at 12:30 am |
Ed.
Methinks, with the skills you show with this voodoo machine, you were wasted in a Rifle Coy. MMGs would have been ideal and we had no dealings with crabs of any sort. We didn’t have carriers in Kingston just Champ jeeps. Preferred the carriers, myself, more room.
Dave Hutchinson // February 12, 2009 at 1:34 am |
You lot are mad, lol, there were carriers in Jamaica I have pictures to prove it. Ha Ha. I shall be back later, tea time is here.
JT // February 12, 2009 at 4:19 am |
Jack
Do you mean nobody in Jamaica caught Crabs “Mechanised Dandruff”?
Dave Hutchinson // February 12, 2009 at 4:33 am |
JT, I just Googled the Club and the Filipone family, I say you are lucky you are not wearing cement shoes as well lol.
JT // February 12, 2009 at 4:50 am |
Dave
No they liked me. When due to constant bad publicity the cops had to close them down for a bit (they had to from time to time), Big Ross told me that when they re opened “in a few weeks” he would want me back, didn’t say dead or alive. There was a big party attended by “the family” and staff, whores, camera girls, bouncers (scary), Police, Restaurant staff. Even the very old Papa Filipone attended, grey fedora hat, no tie, no teeth, only spoke Sicilian.
Jack Madron // February 12, 2009 at 1:58 pm |
Dave.
The Anti Tank Platoon had carriers in Jamaica. While I was there, the MMGs had Champ jeeps. We did have carriers in Minden, Germany. I was Number 1 section commander’s driver. I drove a T16 carrier. The Universal carriers were used for the guns. In Jamaica, I was promoted and became a gunner.
I can’t place that lighthouse. What part of the Island was that at?
Jack Madron // February 12, 2009 at 2:05 pm |
John.
I was talking about the MMGs. When it came to crabs, I can’t speak for the rest of the Battalion. Especially the bug-lers.
Paul (Barney) Barnes // February 12, 2009 at 2:47 pm |
Just to go back to the start of this page, and the Muslims. I have seen that Video clip of the Muslim hoards protesting, it is designed to shock! and it is quite shocking, they say that the UK will be the first country that they will take over?
REALLY???
Well I and no doubt some others will say this.
OVER MY COLD DEAD BODY!!
Paul B.
Jack Madron // February 12, 2009 at 2:51 pm |
Dave.
Don’t know who the Cookhouse Sgt was. The only thing I remember about the cookhouse is the containers outside full of waste food. The bloody shitehawks hanging around and the troughs of water for washing fighting irons. Was that mango tree still there just between the Coy office block and the first billet block?
Jack Madron // February 12, 2009 at 2:58 pm |
Hi Barney.
Thought you had been posted or something. Agree with your comments. If they think they’re going to take over OUR country they’ve got a big surprise coming.
Dave Hutchinson // February 12, 2009 at 6:45 pm |
Jack, that picture was taken at Morant Point, and that’s the light house there, stupid me tried to climb it. Drunk, ha ha,- yes there were steps. That mango tree was there when I left.
Jack Madron // February 12, 2009 at 8:30 pm |
Dave.
Never went that far east. Nearest I got was Harbour Head Range where we (S COY) won the Inter Coy LMG competition. I vaguely remember a large stone quarry out that way, worked by convicts and surrounded by armed guards. Just like the chain gangs in American films. That mango tree is were I got and tasted my first mango, just after we arrived in Jamaica. Tasted like parsnip and I don’t like parsnips.
Editor // February 12, 2009 at 11:49 pm |
BELIEVE IT – THE KURAN SAYS SO
Fuck Me! Grated Britain Unite!
Dave Hutchinson // February 13, 2009 at 12:41 am |
Jack, I think the quarry you are referring to is the cement works, they dig out the rock and process it. We never did our firing there, it was always around Port Royal, and fired onto an island. The Mortars always were with us and we almost got mortared one time as we were quite close to them and they had a dud. That left the mortar, went up about 30 ft, and back down about 20 ft from us, just as well it was a dud, kind of heart stopping it was.
Jack, love mangoes and buy them here at least once a month, I think they taste more like peach, but are so messy. I make mango banana slushie. Yum Yum.
Dave Hutchinson // February 13, 2009 at 12:56 am |
JT. Are you going to come over for the 2010 Winter Olympics, we could go ice fishing on Lake Osoyoos. Just hope we don’t catch some shoes with concrete attached, lol.
Jack you can come too.
JT // February 13, 2009 at 6:36 am |
Ed
Its a bloody outrage banning this Dutch guy. We are such a crappy cowardly country now. Where did it all start? Weak corrupt government at all levels. The cops dare not prosecute the crooks in House of Lords (that lot should by tied together and thrown into the Thames.) (With the bankers)
JT // February 13, 2009 at 6:44 am |
Dave
Does the lake actually freeze? I was in Osoyoos latter part of winter. Fair amount of snow. Man came into reception with small baby rattlesnake in a glass jar. It had been in the trunk of his car. It was frozen hard, then it thawed out and it’s little rattle started, “ah cute little thing” said the receptionist.
JT // February 13, 2009 at 11:46 am |
Let the Dutchman in and make him Prime Minister.
Ban Political correctness
Shoot all Peers in House of Lords
Shoot most MP’s (and Redcaps?)
Shoot all bankers
Scrap these bloody idiotic titles Knighthoods etc
Stop all immigration for time being.
Deport everyone who has been to Pakistan or elsewhere for training.
Make me President
JT // February 13, 2009 at 2:33 pm |
OK so I was grumpy this morning.
Jack Madron // February 13, 2009 at 3:16 pm |
Dave.
We did our machine gun firing at Port Royal as well. See photos on Memorabilia.
Harbour Head Range was where we had the Inter Coy bren and rifle competitions. Our annual range classification was held on the range between camp and Blue Ridge. Can’t remember the name of the range. Do remember the bollocking I got from Smokie Hallet for dropping one point out of a possible. Still, I did get my crossed rifles. In my Army Book 64 Annual Range Classification 1954. Rifle MKSM July.
By the way, I do like mangos. That first one couldn’t have been ripe, or something.
Jack Madron // February 13, 2009 at 3:29 pm |
John.
They spent years and a load of dosh, cleaning up the Thames and here we have you threatening to pollute it. Stakes all the way up the Mall would be better. A bit smokie at first but the wind would soon shift that.
I wonder if Ed had an invite to that wedding in Oz. The bride and groom were going to be in the nuddy. Wedding pix should be interesting.
JT // February 13, 2009 at 4:07 pm |
Jack
Thats OK then if we cut em up a bit they can be fillet stakes.
David // February 14, 2009 at 5:26 am |
JT, depending on how hard a winter we get whether the lake freezes over. I know most of them around here do, and the guys go onto the ice to fish. I hate the cold so don’t go. I’m not sitting there on the ice waiting for fish to bite – No Way Hose! I wish I had learned to ski as it looks interesting, and lots of ski hills near here being so close to the Rockies.
JT // February 15, 2009 at 5:17 am |
Ginger Knob is being sent to an Army “Diversity and Awareness Course” following his calling a Paki a Paki. If he passes this will add yet another important qualification to his 3 “O” level results obtained at Eton. Colouring, Plasticine and Beads. All vital for a Helicopter pilot.
Well Done Harry, Well Done Army
But STOP PRESS our lad is in trouble again saying to a Black performer “You don’t sound like a black chap”. Priceless.
High Commisioner Bongoland // February 15, 2009 at 5:36 am |
Dat Harry
Me wife say he is big OK No 1. She says she could just eat him.
I tell her “Woman don’t eban think about it You in London now. You just ate me bloody chauffer for chris sake. Helf and safety will go bananas.
JT // February 15, 2009 at 1:02 pm |
Oh Dear
Sunday papers today report that Ginger Knob has failed his first tests in flying with Army Air Corps. He is having extra lessons. Bit scary this. Any volunteers to crew his helicopter?
Terry Joll // February 15, 2009 at 5:46 pm |
Believe my or not but I actually like the lad. He makes me laugh and if he keeps putting his foot in it, just look at his grand father
Terry
JT // February 15, 2009 at 7:20 pm |
Terry
I agree and at least he keeps trying.
Jack Madron // February 15, 2009 at 8:42 pm |
Very trying.
Terry Joll // February 15, 2009 at 9:23 pm |
Not on his Christmas Card List I see Jack,
Terry
Jack Madron // February 15, 2009 at 10:35 pm |
No Terry.
And he’s not on mine, either.
Jack Madron // February 15, 2009 at 11:26 pm |
Atlantic Hurricanes 1954.
Hurricane Hazel was the worst of 1954 and one of the worst of 20th century. Hurricane Hazel struck Haiti on Oct 12th 1954 destroying three towns. Death toll estimated to be as high as 1,000 people. Destroyed 40% of the coffee trees and 50% of cocao trees.
Jack Madron // February 15, 2009 at 11:48 pm |
All.
Sorry to bore you chaps with bloody hurricanes but I was getting a bit befuddled with dates and comments. Didn’t know if I’d dreamed it all. Looked up Carribean Hurricanes 1954-55 and there it was. Should have done this in the first place.
HURRICANE HAZEL
HURRICANE HILDA
Jack Madron // February 16, 2009 at 4:57 pm |
Another anniversary in three days time. Doesn’t time fly when you’re having fun.
Editor // February 16, 2009 at 8:02 pm |
Comment transposed from elsewhere
From: JT
To: Swanny
Swanny
Getting worried now. Can we be sure the the 2 allegedly dusky maidens in the dark coal store were not Mocking bird and Monkey face? or more to the point how could YOU be sure in the dark? We can only hope that they were not there as “blind dates” and the Buglers had not planted them on you.
JT // February 16, 2009 at 9:11 pm |
Jack,
Anniversary. Brownie points for remembering?
Jack Madron // February 17, 2009 at 12:19 am |
A Coy. 1st DCLI. Clifton Barracks. Minden.1952. Having come off the range from Bren firing – Brens, mags and mag boxes were handed out for cleaning. Pt Don Maclean, being a rookie and showing his recent training, dived down behind a Bren, lifted it to his shoulder, took a mag out of a box, clipped it to the Bren, cocked, aimed at leg of table and squeezed the trigger. Bang, Bang. Two neat holes in metal table leg and Cpl George Bolton nearly died of fright. There was a big enquiry after.
The officer in charge was Mike Terry. Don’t know the outcome of enquiry but Mac ended up with us in MMGs and Mike Terry in the Anti Tanks. Oh, Cpl Bolton became an RP. What fun we had in the Dukes.
ED: Tut, Tut, – hope that’s not an indication of the training standards of MMGs, Jack
Swanny Swanson // February 17, 2009 at 11:55 am |
JT, With hindsight, I can’t recall what these two girls looked like – that Roy and I took to the you know where!! But I can assure you they were not Mock or Monkeyface. I got pissed lots of times but always managed to get better than those two.
Another story while at Warwick, I picked up a lovely looking girl of Portugese background went out with her for the evening and took her home not far from the camp. While giving her a goodnight kiss out side her front door the fly screen opened and her Father appeared with a shotgun and called me everything but a whiteman! I nearly shit myself and ran for my life, never saw her again.
Jack Madron // February 17, 2009 at 1:57 pm |
Ed.
Not our standard of training. We would have blown the table to matchwood and scrap metal.
Jack Madron // February 17, 2009 at 2:37 pm |
John.
That anniversary I can’t forget. It’s my youngest sister’s birthday. She was only six years old when that naughty army sent me away. I think I used to spoil her a little bit.
JT // February 17, 2009 at 7:15 pm |
Swanny
We are not surprised that you cannot remember what they looked like in the dark. But you must have seen them before enticing them into the coal store, Bet they were good lookers though.
JT // February 17, 2009 at 7:42 pm |
Terry Simons
Checking my records I find that I overpaid you to the sum of £3.2s.6p in March 1955. (about 2 weeks pay?)
I trust that in June you can refund me making some allowance for inflation? Glass of Red might do it.
Terry Simons // February 17, 2009 at 10:36 pm |
John. Sorry you paid me too much in March 1955. I will buy you a glass or 2 when I see you in the British Legion in Heamoor at our Meeting in June. All the best.
Terry Simons
Jack Madron // February 17, 2009 at 11:11 pm |
John.
I was under paid for a couple of weeks in July 54. Who do I claim off? March 55. Wool and eyes come to mind. Wouldn’t work with anybody from S Coy. Ha ha.
JT // February 18, 2009 at 10:44 am |
Libraries in UK are being told to put the Bible on top shelves in case it offends Muzzies. I don’t think Muzzies give a stuff. It’s the politically correct Liberal Lefty Middle class types who are employed by Local Government.These types should be deported to Helmand Province to set up Libraries for the Taliban.
JT // February 18, 2009 at 10:49 am |
Jack, We didn’t do underpayments. March Out – (“the nerve of these people checking up on the slush fund”)
(PS: That’s how WO11 Bill Griffiths got rich). Sorry Billy Boy I thought it best to reveal all after this Bankers bonus scandal.
Letter from Wandsworth Borough Council // February 18, 2009 at 4:16 pm |
Dear Mt Pullthrew
Further to your complaint regarding our placing the Bible on the upper shelves at the Borough Library
Frankly I cannot understand why you object. No one ever reads it and it was last taken out (borrowed) in 1941 (after the Blitz in Balham) whereas the Koran is so used (and badly stained) that we have to get a new one every week or so.
I have spoken to the librarian Ms Jasmin Aga Khan and she says you are a regular visitor who frankly, along with that other pensioner, are something of a nuisance mixing all the ethnic books up and leaving the toilet floor wet. We do ask for a little more understanding and tolerance.
Please count your blessings. You have a bus pass don’t you ? (this is not a threat)
Your faithfully
Mohammed Bin Liner
Council Leader and Imam
Mr A Pullthrew // February 18, 2009 at 6:10 pm |
Dear Mr Liner
Well I never you rude sod. Me and my mate are the best customers in your library. Every morning we go in to read the Sun and visit the bog.
I only said about the bible because it was on the news. As for the other book (Corin?) me and Frank don’t like that geezer in the nighty and little doily cap (looks like Wee Willy Winky) who keeps stairin at it and rocking back and forth. Bit of a nutter of you ask me.
By the way Frank was a Suez veteran. he painted 3 tonners sand colour at Arbourfield REME depot. Course by the time he finished the war was over and he painted them back again.
He had to larf. Tell that bird at the libry we dont mind her splitting on us. Frank fancies her rotten.
Your obedient servant
A Pullthrew
JT // February 18, 2009 at 6:27 pm |
Hi Arthur
Don’t let the bastards get you down.
A Pullthrew // February 18, 2009 at 10:28 pm |
Thank you JT.
I thought that lot was going to blame me and Frank for staining that Korry book. Seems to me that the bloke in the nighty rocking to and fro might be doing that. Looked over his sholder once and there wasnt any pictures that I could see. Frank says that the wrighting was Wog stuff anyway so it might be sex.
Its a funny old world now isnt it?
Bobs your Uncle mate
Arthur
Jack Madron // February 20, 2009 at 5:13 pm |
John.
Thought you might like this version of The Banana Boat Song.
ED: “Jack Madron” above, is now live linked to a You Tube clip. This is achieved by inserting the URL (thats the http:// bit) into the appropriate line in the New Comment box. See instructions on ROR.
PS: This method is recommended. Otherwise you risk being spammed by WordPress when you attempt a URL insertion into the body of text.
JT // February 20, 2009 at 6:20 pm |
Our wonderful government have agreed to accept a Muzzie from Guantanamo Bay. He has Brit “resident” (entered illegally on false passport then claimed asylum) so they will not sent him back to his own country in case he is tortured.
The BBC are naturally reporting showing the old old pictures of Prisoners in orange jump suits etc . (Yawn) all federal prisoners in US wear these.
Usual suspects are phoning in saying how outrageous the Yanks imprisoning these entirely innocent folk who just happened to be visiting Afghanistan and were caught holding the odd innocent AK47 on the battlefield like any normal tourist.
He will be given housing and benefits on arrival and the Press will pay him a fortune for his story.
Grated Brit is right. Cowardly, Corrupt, Fucked Up.
JT // February 20, 2009 at 6:50 pm |
Jack
Oos a clever boy then with this link thingy?
JT // February 20, 2009 at 6:52 pm |
Swanny’s got his tube out. Going to the Chippy tonight? Roast Beef and Yorkshire tomorrow?
Jack Madron // February 20, 2009 at 8:24 pm |
John.
Don’t know about clever. I think lucky is more like it.
Great news from Swanny, isn’t it? We’ll have to watch our pub grub at Bodmin.
ED: Note – the URL insertion comments are found on ROR.
Jack Madron // February 22, 2009 at 4:45 pm |
£6.000 it cost the tax payer for the Puke of York to go 70 miles. How much longer must we put up with these unelected parasites. Democracy? What Democracy.
Dave H // February 22, 2009 at 7:08 pm |
Jack, settle down now, or you will get your blood pressure up ha ha, Don’t fret it we have those kind of leeches in the government here as well and always have an excuse when caught, anyways that £6,000 is just a drop in the bucket out of your Army pension.
Dave H // February 22, 2009 at 7:09 pm |
Oh Jack. Have a nice Day
Jack Madron // February 22, 2009 at 8:29 pm |
Hi Dave.
Taking tablets for blood pressure, so OK in that dept. I get annoyed when so much money is wasted in this country all the time. Enough of preaching for the day.
Army pension? What’s that? I think we’d better ask JT about that sort of thing.
Dave, time wise, how far behind is your part of the world to England?
Dave H // February 22, 2009 at 10:25 pm |
Jack the UK is 7 hrs ahead of me in this part of Canada so as I type it is 2.20 pm or 14.20 hrs here – soon be tea time. Yeah, I’m starving, and its +4C and sunny. Oh and see if JT can swing us a bob or 2!
Dave H // February 22, 2009 at 10:33 pm |
Oh shoot, I forgot to ask you if you did Guard Duty at the (I think it was) Ordanance Depot? It wasn’t far from the camp but we went there by truck close to Long Mountain. I don’t know what we were guarding as everything was locked up. Rumour was that the ghost of an Italian soldier who died there haunted the place. I tell you I kept a good look out for him, but never saw him, ha ha. I think during the war they kept prisoners there.
Jack Madron // February 23, 2009 at 12:32 am |
Dave.
Did some Guards at the Ordnance Depot but only as Guard Commander, so never went inside the fence. There was a gate near the guard hut which was only unlocked for changing sentry. I believe there were trucks and things stored there. Never heard of any ghosts.
Long Mountain, thats the name I’ve been trying to remember. Don’t know where I got Blue Ridge from.
Dave H // February 23, 2009 at 4:11 am |
Jack, if I remember right there was a firing range out that way also, I think we fired bren guns there and rifles. Kept the shite hawks on their toes or claws. I think that ghost thing was just to scare the lads on guard out there. Hey maybe you were thinking of Blue Mountain coffee, Jack
Jack Madron // February 23, 2009 at 12:42 pm |
Dave.
That’s the rifle range I put in the blog, Feb 13th. When there with rifles, we used to burn the rubber packing used in ammo boxes to blacken foresights so we could sight better, without being dazzled with shiny metal. It cleaned off easily after. Don’t know if it improved shooting skills or not for others but it didn’t do me any harm. Crossed rifles. Extra pay. Lovely.
Editor // February 23, 2009 at 12:27 pm |
FOR MY BLOGGER MATES
June 2009 promises many important reunions and new acquaintanceships for many of we Old Bloggers! In some instances it’ll be 54 odd years since some of we Emmetts will have shaken hands with an Old Mate.
What do we look like today? – compared to those photos of vibrant young squaddies of yesteryear.
I’ve launched a brand new Blog (totally separated from the LI Most Wanted Blog) to accommodate individual photos – with captions – that any of you care to send to me in .jpeg format. I shall doctor ‘em using Adobe and Corel and publish in an Individual Section under your own name.
See the proposed matrix that can be found under my hotlinked, bolded name.
Carpe Diem!
Dave H // February 23, 2009 at 11:14 pm |
Wow Jack, for a moment there I thought you said ‘Foreskins’ you put the black on, but i suppose your aim was OK without it on there!
ED: Thread – cheps – thread!
Jack Madron // February 23, 2009 at 11:44 pm |
Hi Dave.
I know my spelling isn’t that good but I didn’t know it was that bad.
What do you think of the new set up the Ed has got? Will you be sending him some of your photos or shall I try and send the ones you e-mailed me? My daughter will have to re-teach me how to down load again. This modern mumbo jumbo has got me baffled.
ED: Thread – cheps – thread! Read ‘How to’ on the Caribbean Re-Union Blog a coupla days ago!
Jack Madron // February 23, 2009 at 11:55 pm |
Dave.
Ease, pull, strike. Two taps right. Fire. After 54 years, still remember.
Double click left. URLs. All double Dutch to me. Guess I’ll never master this voodoo machine.
Editor // February 24, 2009 at 12:20 am |
AREN’T I BLOODY FORTUNATE?
Over the past week I’ve calculated – from all the unsolicted emails that I’ve received – that so far:-
1.) My email has won Euros 850 Million
2.) A long lost ‘unnamed’ relative (who can’t remember my name) has left me USD$25 Million in his Will.
3.) A Nigerian fuckpig will release USD$6 Million if I forward a Deposit of USD$3,000 for expenses.
4.) A Chinese wanker has offered me a lucrative Partnership Deal on receipt of USD$2,500
5.) A Russian sheila thinks I’m wonderful and has proposed marriage.
6.) I can get a bigger dick (not that I need one!) for only $2 a pill over 3 months.
7.) The Inland Revenue of the UK wishes to refund me GBP 5,000 in overpaid income tax (Note – I only worked in the UK for 10 years until 1958)
8.) A London Barrister has untold cash waiting for me in his Client’s bank account – subject to a fee of 30% for him.
9.) A Zimbabwean female refugee (with an Internet Account) just knows that I’ll help her overcome her financial worries!
All these emails without a single one of ‘em knowing my name. Bloody Marvellous!!
Jack Madron // February 24, 2009 at 12:14 pm |
Hey Ed.
What’s it like to be so popular?
JT // February 24, 2009 at 9:12 pm |
Ed
Looks like you are on some winners. Go for it you lucky devil
Dave H // February 24, 2009 at 1:35 am |
The mind still sharp eh, Jack even after 54 years. But I tell you that bloody dial sight had me baffled for awhile. Don’t give up on the computer, it takes time and I’m still learning. As for the pictures I’m still having problems with my scanner, so if you want send ED the ones I sent you. When I get sorted here I will dig up some more. So now off to have a spot of tea.
TA TA
Swanny Swanson // February 24, 2009 at 11:54 am |
All. Since having my feeding tube out and back on proper food, I feel like signing on again! Made my blood boil yesterday, RAF flying in from Cuba that so called BRIT, 3 lawyers etc. Our media with all the dogooders pleading that he had been tortured etc. Think of the costs of all that travelling all out of our pockets the real British Public.
Between the greedy banking system raking in millions, we the pensioners with our meagre savings now at nil per cent in the bank making no interest at all which we rely on to live on. Like most most in the UK we are penalised for saving for a rainy day, who are the ones paying for the the illegal immigrants living it up at our expense
I vote we have JT as our next Chanceller of the Exchequer,
Swanny.
Jack Madron // February 24, 2009 at 12:10 pm |
Swanny.
I was told by Dave H to watch my blood pressure, so I’m telling you the same, old mate.
I feel the same as you about what is going on but there’s nowt we can do. Whoever gets in to power are all the same. Bloody shysters the lot of them. I second your proposal for JT.
Swanny Swanson // February 24, 2009 at 12:02 pm |
ED. Sorry about some of my spellings in last report. Will have to go back to school.
ED: Swanny – so good to get you back ‘Ole Son – write in Swahili – I’ll fix it!
Dave H // February 24, 2009 at 7:25 pm |
Sounds like Swanny would like to have Jack brush up on his MG skills, what a turkey shoot he would have.
Dave H // February 24, 2009 at 7:27 pm |
And when you are done in the UK, Jack come on over here, lots more here we would have a field day and I think fatter Turkeys.
JT // February 24, 2009 at 8:29 pm |
Hi Folks
Stand easy, smoke if you’ve got ‘em.
Been away for a day or so to see me old mum (95 this year). I am relying on her DNA to keep me going.
See you have all had a good old bitching session while I have been away. Well done lads. Bastards
Jack Madron // February 24, 2009 at 11:44 pm |
Hi John.
95 years old. Great. Don’t make em like they used to, do they? I don’t know about smoking, but Swanny and me have been letting off a bit of steam. Well, you got to have a bit of a moan now and again. Haven’t we?
Derek Lovemore // February 27, 2009 at 3:36 am |
CREDIT AIN’T CAPITAL
At least one joker in the whole of Washington (where this entire global meltdown shit occurred) – realises the problem. We are living at the end of an era of financial mis-management AND Guess What? – none of the Pollies in the West (or the East for that matter) have a fucking clue!
Rub a Dud Rudd, the Aussie PM and his cohorts are prime examples. Printed money chucked after more printed money!
This You Tube clip is worth a browse. Makes yer hair curl, when you realise the implications of what he speaks about.
JT // February 27, 2009 at 2:52 pm |
Yep the world is stuffed allright. Still we have lived in interesting times have we not? Just want to hang on til the Asteroid hits or start of nuclear war.
“Its being so cheerful as keeps me going”
(Mona Lott from Itma says Jack)
JT // February 27, 2009 at 4:16 pm |
STOP PRESS
The muzzie recently brought to UK at great expense (and will be granted large benefits and compensation of course) reports that inmates of Guantanamo are regularly “Sexually Tortured” by attractive female US marines stripping off in front of them
I am proposing to ED that we organise bookings for our blog members for say a two week vacation there before the US authorities are inundated with applicants, Rumour has it that Butlins Holidays have expressed an interest. (Not a family holiday I would have thought.)
Word of warning, the word “attractive female marines” may be open to interpretation and a butch female Marine Gunnery Sgt with a moustache and hairy legs may not be everyones cup of tea.
Successful applicants must take their normal medication.
More on this later.
Derek Lovemore // March 1, 2009 at 8:39 pm |
MY OATH! I AM SOOOO FORTUNATE THIS WEEK
If it wasn’t enough that over the weeks I have received scores of emails advising me that Millions of Euros and Millions of US Dollars await my collection from many deceased estates – I’ve had another one, that tops the lot.
Lady! – British landed gentry no less – widowed and dying of a hideous disease, wants me to have her estate of 20 million quid. She wants no phone calls (didn’t give me her address in Chelsea anyway) in case her relatives find out that she wants to give me the money. She’s too sick to answer a phone anyway but can write an email (that’s verbose in the extreme).
She and her benefactor husband (while he lived) made a pact to bequeath ME the estate to establish a fund for disadvantaged women. All this without knowing my name, where I live, or my reputation with women! All I need do is sent ‘em some money first to set up the transfers.
Living in OZ with an Aussie email address has many, many advantages. Talk about the Lucky Country!
Dave H // March 3, 2009 at 5:50 am |
You lucky bugger Terry, can I come to the shoot?
Derek Lovemore // March 3, 2009 at 9:37 am |
BLOG THREAD REPLY
Is this ‘un in the correct place Dave? Advise please!
JT // March 1, 2009 at 9:17 pm |
Ed
What luck you have. Get on the earliest flight before the pheasant shooting season ends on your estate. Jack can provide some extra firepower.
Editor // March 1, 2009 at 9:20 pm |
Yeah JT. Think of the fun we can have annually – on my ‘new’ estate. Jack will recognise the Pheasant Pluckers!
JT // March 2, 2009 at 7:59 pm |
Where’s Bill?
David // March 4, 2009 at 5:36 am |
BLOG THREAD REPLY
Is this ‘un in the correct place Dave? Advise please! Buggered if I know, you are the Ed.
ED: Er Um Dave! What is meant is “which question/comment on which blog are you replying to?” My interpretation is that you are replying to a Terry Comment on Caribbean and the referred ‘Reply” is on Bloody Unbelievable. There appears to me to be no continuity.
As we all now know – continuance of a topic is best dealt with by “Replying” to a given Comment by ‘threading”. I can transfer inter – blog, BUT I cannot replicate the Sender’s email ID.
Jack Madron // March 4, 2009 at 8:11 pm |
Dave.
I think your blog is possibly on the wrong page. Terry and I were on Caribbean Re-Union, chatting about trenches and Brens. Is this the subject you want to comment on?
I must admit that when Ed brought in “threading” it took me a time to grasp it. Nothing to do with what Ed was doing, just my ignorance in computers. I’m still learning.
Dave H // March 5, 2009 at 5:45 am |
I don’t know which blog or where it was now, can’t remember past midnight anyways. I think it was ED saying he got e-mail some woman leaving him a fortune and you guys wanting to go to his estate on a shoot. I asked can I come too. There are that many blogs I can’t keep track of them or where they are. Senior moments galore.
Dave H // March 5, 2009 at 5:53 am |
Just found it and I think it is in the right place. March 1st post by DL.
Editor // March 5, 2009 at 6:01 am |
OK Dave. All is forgiven – just checking ‘Ole Mate. You should sit here and see the jumble of stuff that passes through. Like a croc passing an Abo!
Dave H // March 5, 2009 at 7:05 am |
No problem Derek, I don’t know how you do it. I know I couldn’t.
Jack Madron // March 5, 2009 at 7:42 pm |
Onen Ag Al.
Happy St Pirans Day. Kernow Bys Vyken.
Dave Hutchinson // March 6, 2009 at 12:51 am |
When will it all end?
The bodies of three Canadian soldiers killed in a roadside bomb attack are on their way home following an emotional ramp ceremony at Kandahar Airfield.
Swanny Swanson // March 9, 2009 at 5:36 pm |
All. What bad news, who would have thought this atrocity has taken place in Northern Ireland, the cold bloodied murder of two young Sappers and carnage of the others involved. I served in the Corps of Royal Engineers for 12 years and like serving in the DCLI it felt closer to home!
My son Donald did several tours while serving in 2LI when the troubles there was at it’s peak After the peace there who would have thought that this terrible act would have happened, lets hope that the Army or NI Police will apprehend these bastards who committed this heinous act and that they get them sooner than later.
Swanny.
Derek Lovemore // March 11, 2009 at 12:15 pm |
NOT ONLY GRATED – BRITAIN
But Shaken, Stirred, Diced, Squashed, Squeezed, Juiced
Read this OZ article – make yer ‘air curl! If you haven’t already torn it out!
Derek Lovemore // March 12, 2009 at 12:08 am |
MUSLIMS MOCK BRITISH DEAD IN IRAQ
Read the latest – cheps – and ponder on where all this is headed. Referred by Dave H in Canada.
Enoch Powell – where are you now?
Dave H // March 12, 2009 at 3:26 am |
Thanks for posting that Derek.
JT // March 15, 2009 at 6:54 pm |
The lads already had fixed bayonets – wishful thinking.
I dunno I sometimes get such a feeling of despair. Yes Enoch was 110% right and one day there will be “blood in the streets”
Derek Lovemore // March 16, 2009 at 10:32 pm |
COPY THIS OBSCENITY
US President Obama today announces that the US Federal Attorney General will examine ways to prevent the Executive Payouts at AIG after the US Government has bailed out this Corporation with USDBillions.
Well fuck me Mr Obama! Your greedy Corporate America has raped and pillaged your economy and the ripple effect on the Western World has fucked us all!
You give these arseholes the cash after THEY bankrupt their Corporation and now YOU spend more dollars – yet again – to try to ensure the appropriate application of the money.
You really don’t have a fucking clue. The first of the many cracks in your Presidency and like most Politicians you have no fucking idea of what to do other than chucking money away! FUCKING OBSCENE!
JT // March 16, 2009 at 10:42 pm |
Yep there are some worrying cracks appearing. Plus he only gave Gordon Brown a dvd set of movies. Just because he believes that the British Army tortured his Grand Dad (so said his Grand ma in Kenya). Hm, wasn’t the British Army that I knew. Might have been Kenya Police though. Might be that Grannie got it wrong.
Jack Madron // March 17, 2009 at 12:28 am |
I wonder if they were Mau Mau.
Derek Lovemore // March 17, 2009 at 1:27 pm |
Finally, a definition of globalisation, that I can understand and to which I can relate. Question: What is the truest definition of Globalisation?
Answer: Princess Diana’s death. Question: How come?
Answer: An English princess with an Egyptian boyfriend, crashes in a French tunnel, being driven in a German car with a Dutch engine, driven by a Belgian who was drunk on Scotch whisky, followed closely by Italian Paparazzi, on Japanese motorcycles. Treated by an American doctor, using Brazilian medicines.
This is posted by an Australian citizen, a naturalised Englishman of Sth African descent using Bill Gates’s technology, and you’re probably reading this on your computer, that uses Taiwanese chips, and a Korean monitor, assembled by Bangladeshi workers in a Singapore plant. Transported by Indian truck-drivers, hijacked by Indonesians, unloaded by Maltese wharfies and trucked to you by Kiwi freeloaders.
That, my friends is Globalisation
Editor // March 17, 2009 at 11:05 pm |
GREAT COMMENT REFERRED IN BY BILL GRIFFITHS
(Quote) An example to British politicians and the judiciary alike.
One thing about blokes from Oz is that their hearts and humour are always in the right place!
T B Bechtel, a City Councillor from Newcastle, Australia, was asked on a local live radio talk show, just what he thought about the allegations of torture of suspected terrorists. His reply prompted his ejection from the studio, but to thunderous applause from the audience.
HIS STATEMENT: ‘If hooking up one rag head terrorist prisoner’s testicles to a car battery to get the truth out of the lying little camelshagger will save just one Australian life, then I have only three things to say,’ ‘Red is positive, Black is negative, and – make sure his nuts are wet.’
JT // March 24, 2009 at 7:09 pm |
Today our government issued a warning that status for imminent terrorist attack was “Severe” and the main danger is now Biological or nuclear Dirty Bomb attacks.
They tell us that the main danger is from Brit citizens of Paki origin going to Pak for training. So why why don’t we legislate that anyone under say 50 who goes to Pak for any reason gets a one way ticket and re entry is blocked?
The guys we are taking back from Guantanamo were all caught as innocent tourists on the battlefield innocently carrying a weapon. They are to get compensation, free housing and and income plus big bucks for selling their hard luck story to the media
God help us, we are ruled by fucking idiots.
JT // March 24, 2009 at 7:31 pm |
Whereas we used to feel superior about certain countries or nations being corrupt I am saddened at my age to realize that Britain is just the same or worse – politicians, bankers, etc
JT // March 24, 2009 at 11:22 pm |
Now the bloody Hindus are demonstrating. THEY want to burn their dead in the open on bonfires. Wot next? Its Culcha Innit ?
Why can’t they wait til 5th November?
Anyway Elf and Safety say no in case smell of cooking and smoke upsets the neighbours and The Fire Brigade says “Bollocks” Watch this space.
JT // March 25, 2009 at 4:28 am |
Bah
JT // April 2, 2009 at 9:32 am |
JT
Talking to myself. Was it something I said?
Jack Madron // April 2, 2009 at 1:26 pm |
Be careful John. Talking to yourself is ok but when you start answering yourself is the time to worry. I keep forgetting this blog and others. Only come on here now and again to have a looksee.
Editor // April 3, 2009 at 4:50 am |
BUCKLE UP BOYOS! – BUMPY RIDES AHEAD!
BUGGER THE BERMUDIAN BANKERS.
So, ‘Messiah’ Obama, ‘Condom’ Brown and ‘Rub a Dud’ Rudd, with all the other G20 Poison Pollies are shifting the globe into rampant inflation and further recession with excessive spending. ‘Tis the only approach these wankers have – throw more money away – so that more loans that fuel re-loans and debts (that’ll never be repaid by Mexico etc), in the hope that good times will return. Blame the private sector and build up the cradle to grave mentality.
My Advice: Wait for September, but buy gold now!
My solution. Sure, regulate the bankers, OPEC and greedy corporates. Send all foreigners in USA, UK and OZ back to their country of origin and let ‘em work on their own economies. Shut the borders, bring in a 2 weeks only annual holiday, cut out all the pension perks, make the kids walk to school and shut down children’s TV to 1 hour daily and teach ‘em some work ethics and manners. Bring back conscription for 2 years for ALL 18 year olds and recall our troops from Iraq and Afghanistan. Ban Chinese foreign property ownership. Double the Age Pension for only Natural Citizens, bring in odd/even fuel days and restrict Sundays to walking or essential deliveries. Sterilise females with more than 2 kids and make DNA testing mandatory for fathering. Garnishee all Family Support Payments into a central fund.
Vote Gordon Ramsay onto the front bench and appoint him Treasurer.
Permit TOTAL freedom of religion – but if you’re not Anglican, RC or an Atheist – then relocate – and practise it in Iran or the fucking Sudan! – without grafting off the Social Services.
Get real you fucking Pollies, where’s the evidence that you know what you are doing? You hold a £40 million party, disrupt London and create more chaos and this is the best that you wankers can do!
Dr Strangelove // April 3, 2009 at 1:45 pm |
Seig Heil
But no brown shirts, it was a crap colour and looked silly.
JT // April 3, 2009 at 1:52 pm |
Ed
Now then Ed calm down calm down. See Rudd made a stewardess cry because she couldn’t find him a veggie meal. Stone the crows mate, a Veggie Ozzie? wots the world coming to?
Jack Madron // April 3, 2009 at 2:38 pm |
Hey John.
Maybe Rudd isn’t the dud that some think he is. A Veggie Ozzie! With Jamie Oliver doing the cooking, who can blame him.
Jack Madron // April 3, 2009 at 2:50 pm |
Bloody hell Ed. Gordon Ramsay for Treasurer! Another two bit cook.
JT // April 15, 2009 at 3:42 pm |
Being a red wine connysewer (and cheapskate) as you know I normally drink Oz Screech. Yesterday I was persuaded to try a Kiwi Red. Subtle hint of sheep dip?
Blue tongue this morning, is this dangerous?
Jack Madron // April 17, 2009 at 1:01 pm |
John.
A statement out today, states that red wine is full of calories. Is this the cause of your bay window? At least you have an excuse. I haven’t.
JT // April 18, 2009 at 4:23 pm |
Jack
What do you drink then?
Jack Madron // April 18, 2009 at 11:25 pm |
John.
Must admit I’m not a big drinker. I’m not TT just gone off booze in the last few years. I must admit that I am rather partial to a Bailey’s Irish Cream. Always had a sweet tooth.
New Zealand Wine Growers // April 15, 2009 at 4:01 pm |
Dear JT
As Hon Sec of the above association I was interested in your comments about New Zealand Wine. As you know the term Oz Screech describes the typical sound of liquid exiting the following morning (hopefully into the lav) after drinking (budget Australian Wine). I shall be interested to know if you experienced any sounds of that nature this morning.
By the way the animal disease Blue Tongue cannot be transmitted by our red wine. Our overall advice to you is that you might spend a little more than 2 quid a bottle whether buying OZ or Kiwi wine
PS: We do add a small quantity of sheep dip as a flavouring agent mainly for our domestic market
JT // April 15, 2009 at 4:15 pm |
Duke of York’s daughter (the fat bint) is on hols. Hope the Jap whaling fleet is in the area. Her police bodyguard for this trip costs £250,000
Why do the minor royals have police protection and at our expense?
Should be only the Queen and the old boy.
Bah
JT // April 20, 2009 at 12:38 pm |
OK only £25,000.
A Coy Poem // April 18, 2009 at 4:39 pm |
Rosie Rosie, always willing
Showed us her tits for only a shilling.
She was a lovely shade of brown
But not the prettiest in Hamilton town.
Swanny Swanson // April 21, 2009 at 11:13 am |
ED, I endorse all of JT’s comments about minor royals. I see in the paper today our MP’s have given themselves an extra weeks holiday, with expenses gone through the roof! Smith has skin thicker than a Rhino’s and I for one don’t see any of them more than professional scroungers!
Jack Madron // April 24, 2009 at 10:55 pm |
The shit houses are kicking the Gurkhas again. What in hell is wrong with this fucking country. It bloody stinks. If you are an undesirable, you can come here and stay but if you serve the country proudly, Good bye. Don’t come back. Time to get the Vickers out of moth balls. I think.
ED: Hear Hear Jack. See Guardian article linked under Jack’s name. Well done with the linking Jack!
John Tenniswood // April 25, 2009 at 2:24 am |
A man phoned a London Radio Station yesterday. His 2 girls (8 and 10) went to a North London Junior School where 95% of the kids were Muslim. His children were coming home bruised and distressed but would not talk about it. Turns out that they were being bullied by Muslim kids because they were white and Christian.
After he complained, parents waiting for their children outside the school began taunting the man calling him “Kaffir” (unbeliever) and some of the women spat at him. He removed his girls from school and now has to teach them at home.
Yesterday I took a bus from Balham to Clapham (3 Miles). On the lower deck out of 19 passengers my wife and I were the only white people. I pointed out that there was a large percentage of Somalis who are easily identified by their facial features. ALL their women and girl children were wearing Muslim head dress.
Editor // April 25, 2009 at 2:33 am |
Pity that Enoch Powell wasn’t the Conductor!
John Tenniswood // April 25, 2009 at 2:39 am |
Ed
Guess Enoch would say I bloody well told you so, and “watch out one day for blood in the streets”
Jack Madron // April 25, 2009 at 4:42 pm |
How the hell do all these people get into the country in the first place? I remember the trouble we had getting through customes when coming on leave from Germany. Things must be bloody lax nowadays.
JT // May 5, 2009 at 9:57 am |
Still blogless at home
JT // May 5, 2009 at 10:50 am |
Now there’s a funny thing. I just got home and got on the blogs after many days of blank out.
JT // May 8, 2009 at 11:22 am |
Muslim dentist in an NHS practice refuses to treat women unless they wear Muslim head dress. I give up.
Paul (Barney) Barnes // May 8, 2009 at 3:59 pm |
Enoch Powell and his speech Rivers of Blood. They called him and labelled him a Racist, but he was not a racist he was in fact a realist who was 20/30 years before his time. He warned this country what would happen and he was right, bang on the nail, bet they wished they had listened to him rather than scorned him now.
And now they wonder why the BNP are gaining support and votes left right and centre? Like it or not the BNP are now a legal and official political party, just like Sinn Fein? and apparently they reckon that the BNP will back the Gurkhas in their campaign to enable them to stay in the UK.
So perhaps we should forget the old BNP and whatever we thought of them and look to the new modern version of the BNP? Who knows? Not I.
Editor // May 9, 2009 at 3:15 am |
JOHANNA LUMLEY HAS BALLS!
Singlehandedly Johanna has front and centered the wimpy Grated Britain Government to demand expediency over the appalling Gurkha treatment.
GoodonyerJo!
JT // May 9, 2009 at 6:53 pm |
Joanna makes them look such c…s
JT // May 9, 2009 at 12:16 pm |
Oz PM Elmer Fudd threw a wobbly because he could not get a hair dryer. Luckily he managed to get his toe nails polished so they looked cute in his sandals.
Jack Madron // May 9, 2009 at 1:04 pm |
John.
Isn’t he a character in an American cartoon series?
JT // May 9, 2009 at 5:45 pm |
Jack
I think Elmer Fudd is the hunter in Daffy Duck Looney tunes
JT // May 9, 2009 at 5:47 pm |
“Stand still wabbit”
JT // May 9, 2009 at 5:47 pm |
Must be Bugs Bunny
Jack Madron // May 10, 2009 at 6:39 pm |
Either will do John. Used to enjoy all the Looney tunes. “What’s up Doc”?
Swanny Swanson // May 11, 2009 at 3:18 pm |
All. You would think after all the work that Joanna Lumley has done on behalf of the Gurkhas that the government would listen to the people of this country in their outcry of popular demand for those who we – as Soldiers, respect what these fantastic men have done fighting for our used to be Great Nation? Over the last century and more that these great warriors have done on our behalf as fellow Riflemen to not be allowed to stay in the UK, all the poxy MP’s of all parties are only interested in getting richer with their expenses etc. We as ex servicemen have all signed petitions etc for these brave men to be allowed to stay in the UK but it seems to be falling on DEAF EARS!
JT // May 18, 2009 at 1:59 pm |
Testing
Jack Madron // May 18, 2009 at 3:11 pm |
John.
What are you testing?
Jack Madron // May 18, 2009 at 3:17 pm |
John.
Got it. Didn’t notice JT highlighted. Fresh Fruit. Good laugh. You’re getting clever in your old age. I suppose you’re classed as a Silver Surfer now. Well done.
JT // May 18, 2009 at 8:47 pm |
More Spike
Editor // May 22, 2009 at 12:20 am |
BRITISH MPs SNOUTS IN THE TROUGH
London Telegraph latest!
JT // May 25, 2009 at 8:41 am |
Re Above
We must hope the come election time something good will happen and the whole bloody nest of crooks and spivs is cleaned out. Hope the press keeps the pressure on.
JT // June 24, 2009 at 8:25 pm |
allo allo anyone out there. ?
Jack Madron // June 30, 2009 at 7:26 pm |
Yep John.
Still here.
Arthur Pullthrew // July 2, 2009 at 3:29 pm |
Dear Globs
Sorry I have been out ofn touch but I was banned aggain from the libray. My typing is a bit out off practiose
I will send you a letter what I got from the council again. Bastards.
Anyhow it was that geezer in the white frock and beerd banging his head on that corin book that got my goat again. I said you want to watch that mate itll do your head in. It was joke but he complaioned to the woman in the black tent who seems to be in charge. `She suspended my library card. I said fuck this for a game of soldiers last time you blamed me for weeing on the floor in the gents and it was my ex army mate poor old Smudger. Never could shoot straight. I didnt drop him in it of course.
But to get a laugh I asked her to show me her tits and blimey that did it.
My feet didnt touch til I was out side.
You known I joined in 46 dont you young shavers. Get some in…ha ha
More soon if I behave in the library but i think they are agist
Arthur
Ex RA
Clr Jeri Khan // July 4, 2009 at 5:35 pm |
Dear Mr Pullthrew
After due consideration we have reinstated your library card following suspension.
The council taken a dim view of racism in all its forms and your remark to Ms Khan the librarian was disgraceful and probably criminal but once again we have taken your age into consideration
Also Mr Denis Khan being a local mullah was not amused at your crude mockery of his perhaps over energetic devotions he was undertaking in the library i.e banging his head on the Holy Book
On another matter we have as you know received in the past several complaints that you leave the computer keyboards “sticky” We trust that you will in future wash your hands after you eat your jam donuts in the Gents .
Your obedient servant
J Khan Clr
A Yew. // July 4, 2009 at 11:23 pm |
Mr Khan.
I agree with you about raceism. If the Lord meant us to run, he would have gave us 4 legs.
Arthur Pullthrew // July 6, 2009 at 4:23 pm |
What I want to no is how the bugers know I eat Jam Do nuts in the Gents.
Ive told Smudger not spend a smuch time in there with those pictures he tares out of magazines . He was just the same in Aldershot always in the bogs
JT // July 6, 2009 at 8:20 pm |
Arthur
Seems like you have a security problem at the library. Is there CCTV in the gents do you think ?
If you cant eat a jam donut in the bogs in private just what is the country coming to ?
Write to your MP.
Rev Maltravers (Fluffy) // July 7, 2009 at 4:28 am |
Dear Arthur
I have had to stop visiting the Gents on Clapham Common. This used to be a favourite “cottaging” venue. Its not illegal of course but I believe there are cameras everywhere and in my position is precarious (sort of on probation with the Bishop since the missing lead from the church roof)
Shall I send you a picture ?
Arthur Pullthrew // July 7, 2009 at 8:15 am |
JT
I am writingg to my MP todAY.
Now Ive got a queer vicar writing to me. TH3 WIFE WILL GO bananas if she finds out. Its this High T stuff getting too cleverr. You doint know whose watching
Harry Hupp // July 7, 2009 at 11:22 pm |
Rev Maltravers.
Sir, having failed to pester that poor machine gunner, I notice you are now hounding a poor soul who enjoys donuts. I bet that you are only after his donuts, you greedy sod. Shame on you.
Rev Maltravers (Fluffy) // July 8, 2009 at 4:43 pm |
Dear Mr Hupp
I most certainly did not pester a machine gunner. It was his obsession with stripping vicars which caused me to write to him hoping to assist his obvious disturbed state of mind.
I am always willing to help soldier boys (and sailors)
Out of touch for some time (doing some actually) but according to Jack Madron I believe there is a poor lad in Canada who might need my help soon when I am not so busy.
JT // July 8, 2009 at 4:45 pm |
Dave
Think you had better lie low for a bit. Jack has dropped you in it.
Dave H // July 9, 2009 at 12:04 am |
JT I think Fluffy needs some help , not me , Has probably been hanging around with Michael far too much ,
JT // July 9, 2009 at 10:17 pm |
Alf for Prime Minister ?
JT // July 9, 2009 at 10:24 pm |
Alf
Dave H // July 10, 2009 at 3:30 am |
How about this lassie http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7vvAK_e-o20
Jack Madron // July 10, 2009 at 3:24 pm |
Dave.
That was brilliant. Brought tears to my eyes.
Dave H // July 10, 2009 at 5:28 pm |
She is a good un, isn’t she Jack, I played it 3 times, wow.
JT // July 16, 2009 at 7:43 pm |
Its bloody amazing and so typical. Channel 4 news reporting the funeral of the Lt Col of the Welsh Guards referred to him throughout as “the Lieutenant” the Meeja are so fucking ignorant. How disgraceful
Jack Madron // July 16, 2009 at 9:47 pm |
John.
The tabloids are no better. Eight hearses pass through Wootton Bassett and most of the bloody papers have their front pages full of the bloody Jackson family.
JT // July 29, 2009 at 3:40 pm |
Met Police ordered not to wear little Union Flag badges from Brit Legion. Coz it might “offend some people” What people I wonder ?”
Fortunately the rank and file are saying bollocks and continuing to wear them.
They will be objecting to the Union Flags covering the coffins of the lads brought back from Afghanistan next.
But you know Its not the mozzies that object ; its the lefty, liberal arseholes in government paid by our taxes who start all this rubbish.
Arthur Pullthrew // August 1, 2009 at 4:30 pm |
Greetings blog. Finally Got my typping up to speedj you see.
Alls quiet at the library for a bit. tyye geezer in the dress with beerd still banging his head but i take no notice. Got enough troub;e. at home thanks. The wife has declared war on the bin men. mind you they are a bolshie lot. I reckon most of them have done some porridge so i keep out of it.
i dont think its my typinh so much as my arthritis.
Course it might be the stticky keys 0n the library computer I think its jam.
Times up they only gives me an hour.
JT // August 1, 2009 at 6:50 pm |
Its ‘ealth and safety innit?
London firefighter phoned LBC today. He is Health and Safety officer at the fire station.
If he sees a dud light bulb he has to send for an outside contractor to change it. He is not allowed to use a step ladder, but makes the point that when he goes out with a Fire Engine they carry 40 foot ladder. Doh
Dave H // August 3, 2009 at 5:25 am |
I worked for a chemical company many years ago and had to do a check on the product using a kind of box with a electric light bulb in it. Anyhow, on my night shift, the bulb burned out, so I changed it, left the old one on the desk. Next morning electrician came in and saw the burned bulb, ask me who changed it, I said I did. Well the shit hit the fan. You should have called me in to do it, it’s not your job, the union will have to be told. And I was told by shop steward I was a bad lad. I did the poor electrician out of a call in and about $30.
JT // August 3, 2009 at 6:35 pm |
Dave
We didn’t have a union problem at the Penthouse Club Vancouver.
Dave H // August 3, 2009 at 8:00 pm |
Maybe not JT, but I worked for a living, I don’t wonder you didn’t have a union there anyone who started one would end up wearing cement shoes
Jack Madron // August 4, 2009 at 8:44 pm |
Masons. Private Clubs. Unions. Cameron’s snotty club at Oxbridge. Ban the bloody lot. Nothing but trouble.
Dave H // August 4, 2009 at 11:28 pm |
Jack have you just taken an ugly pill. Ha ha
Paul (Barney) Barnes // August 6, 2009 at 10:43 am |
I hear that the DCLI have been left out of the service for Harry Patch, whose fault is/was that?
Any way I heard this morning on Radio Cornwall that there is to be a Memorial Service at Bodmin’s St Petrocs Church sometime in October. Does anyone on here know the exact date, timings etc, because if at all possible I will be digging out the Regimental Jacket, Tie and Beret and would like to attend the service as I think we all should, and show them how the Cornish and the Dukes and todays L.I. Associations can and will give Harry the send off that he deserves. We must attend in numbers and if I can help in anyway I’m here just say the word.
Regards
Barney.
JT // August 10, 2009 at 6:05 pm |
Hi Barney
What are you up to nowadays ?
JT // August 7, 2009 at 1:44 pm |
News today Greek girl sets genitals of British drunk on fire in Crete night club by pouring Zambuka on his exposed bits then lighting it.
Thought I would get the song in before Jack does.
JT // August 7, 2009 at 2:34 pm |
Fire Down Below.
JT // August 7, 2009 at 2:37 pm |
OK so I’ve nothing else to do this afternoon
JT // August 7, 2009 at 2:41 pm |
Think I’ll have a nap after this one
Jack Madron // August 8, 2009 at 12:20 am |
JT.
If that Zambuka had got back any farther, he might have been singing “Ring of Fire”. I wonder if he had onions with that hot dog.
Dave H // August 11, 2009 at 5:11 am |
Wow her cat could get singed if she don’t watch out.
JT // August 8, 2009 at 8:26 am |
Jack
Knew you would come up with something.
Dave H // August 10, 2009 at 3:08 am |
Could be called a hot dog roast or Burn Baby Burn
The Rev B Maltravers ex RN // August 11, 2009 at 9:05 pm |
Hello David
I have been meaning to contact you for some time since Jack and Swanny sort of tipped me off. (Sorry boys).
For many months I have been out of contact with you soldier boys. I have had a problem concerning some missing lead from the church roof and a misunderstanding concerning weekly visit by the Verger to my house to play Monopoly.
Unfortunately his wife (a notorious local busy body) took to peeping through window and came to the wrong conclusion.
As you may know I used to be a Chaplain in the RN until an unfortunate incident concerning a Rating at Pompey in 1965 leading to my resigning my position.
Anyway David, after following your blogging activities I think we might become pals. Who knows at some future date you might send me the fare so that I can visit your delightful neck of the woods as they say.
Do call me Fluffy. My sailors did.
Dave H // August 12, 2009 at 10:16 pm |
Well Well, Gob Smacked again. As for you playing Monopoly, methinks there was more like a circle jerk going on and would not be surprised if JT was in attendance. As for me sending $$$$ for your fare, sorry but I have already got it saved for JT. He is more my type, I just love face fuzz. I was going to ask Jack but JT has more fuzz. They say you get more of a buzz on the fuzz. Anyways sorry to disappoint, but it seems to me you like sailors, maybe you will find true friendship, down at the local Docks. Regards Dave
A Pullthrew Ex RAOC Storeman // August 11, 2009 at 9:17 pm |
Dear Bloggers
Well just logging in. I reckon that navy bible basher is a bit of a you know what bandit. Everyone nows that most RN are.
Rum Bum and Gramophone records as they used to say. They had nowt else to do most of the time. Some even did knitting.
JT // August 11, 2009 at 9:42 pm |
Hi Arthur
I see your typing is getting better
A Pullthrew // August 12, 2009 at 9:10 am |
Hello JT
Yes but o9nlyz because the wog bird in the libry helped me. She is nice to me since i askd her to show me her legs. Bert thinks she might fancy me. Thats a laugh. God knoesz what she l;ooks like in that black tent. Might be a bloke says bert
A well wisher // August 11, 2009 at 9:47 pm |
For Dave and Fluffy
Dave H // August 12, 2009 at 10:21 pm |
For Well wisher
Beano Breaking News // August 13, 2009 at 6:56 am |
Lord Snooty named in new expenses row. The peer is in trouble again after a report that he has been claiming Aunt Matilda’s castle as second home whilst claim housing benefit. It is said that several of his pals occupy the premises.
This latest blow to the posh peer follows an investigation alleging child abuse by keeping the Twins (Snitch and Snatch) in romper suits for over 60 years.
Ted Bear // August 13, 2009 at 11:00 am |
COMING TO A BEACH NEAR YOU
Now don’t get too excited – you Cornish Cheps – you’ll be getting your share of the new models soon.
Jack Madron // August 13, 2009 at 1:02 pm |
Cpl Ted.
A 35 year old mother has been banned from her local swimming pool for wearing a burkini. A spokesman for the pool, near Paris, said, “This isn’t about segregation. It’s about hygiene.
The woman said if it isn’t sorted, I will leave the country. Hey, that’s one way of getting rid of them.
Dave H // August 13, 2009 at 5:22 pm |
Hey you Guys, the chick was white, a convert. Must be messed up in the head, where do we send her?
JT // August 13, 2009 at 7:46 pm |
On the other hand. ” Underneath the Burkha?”
Jack Madron // August 13, 2009 at 8:42 pm |
Wasn’t that Flanigan and Allen, JT?
JT // August 14, 2009 at 7:13 am |
Jack
Down Paradise Row ?
JT // August 13, 2009 at 8:00 pm |
Dear Santa
Can I have one for Christmas please ?
JT // August 13, 2009 at 8:16 pm |
One for the road then an early night for you boys
Dave H // August 13, 2009 at 9:02 pm |
JT you should do that belly dance before you jump into bed at night, might do wonders for the Bay Window.
Dave H // August 13, 2009 at 9:07 pm |
Jack, do you think I have put Fluffy off or do you think he is gonna try grow face fuzz like JT? But I’m sure just like a bad penny he is going to turn up again one of these days.
Jack Madron // August 14, 2009 at 12:53 pm |
No Dave.
I don’t think you can put Fluffy off. I should just let him ramble on about roof lead, verger etc. He’s very amusing at times. Don’t you think so. JT?
Dave. I forgot about Bill. I was thinking about our local chaps. Bill lives up in the Herefordshire area and we only know each other through these blogs.
JT // August 14, 2009 at 9:10 pm |
Jack
Well I don’t know about The Rev. He seems to be turned about stripping Vickers, belts, vibrations and all that macho MMG stuff. and he fancies Dave for some strange reason. Dave shouldn’t get too upset by him. Pretty harmless I think.
At least we seem to have got rid of Bunty. Now she was really scary.
JT // August 14, 2009 at 9:31 pm |
Dave what the hell does it matter whether Fluffy he has an attractive beard like me?
Also regarding the bay window. It was my aunt from t’ North who said and I quote “ee lad tha’s never seen a shithouse with a bay window”. “So get that tripe and onions down thee and bit of black pudding after”
Dave H // August 14, 2009 at 9:56 pm |
JT, we northern folk know what we are talking about.
JT // August 15, 2009 at 9:50 am |
Dave
Where in t’ North are thee from lad ?
Jack Madron // August 15, 2009 at 10:01 pm |
JT.
We won’t mention French spies or primates.
JT // August 16, 2009 at 4:16 pm |
Jack
Oh yes I remember now. French Pirates etc
Dave, do the locals still drag their knuckles on the ground when they walk?
Dave H // August 16, 2009 at 5:53 pm |
JT, now come on if you are going to say anything about us lads from the North, get your story right. Pirates had nowt to do with it. Now stop choking your chicken and go do your research.
JT // August 16, 2009 at 9:15 pm |
Hey Dave its nowt to do with me. Jack is stirring it.
I think its perfectly normal to hang a monkey as a French spy and all my family dragged knuckles, doesn’t everyone in t’ North?
Dave Hutchinson // August 16, 2009 at 10:23 pm |
JT. Just to put you on the right track, that Monkey story was the doing of the Frenchies, you know what they are like. Nice to your face, and then stab you in the back. JT, everyone in the north are mongrels, way back when the Romans screwed our women, then the Vikings and god knows who else. So we are quite a mixture I would think
Dave H // August 16, 2009 at 12:08 am |
Jack, zip it HA HA. Good God I will never hear the last of it.
John Billett // August 16, 2009 at 3:01 pm |
JT, Reference: Old Folly: My son Steve visited Jamaica history on web, apparently your story was nearer than mine, Errol Flynn had nothing to do with it, what lying toads they were.
J B
Dave H // August 16, 2009 at 5:48 pm |
JB, It was I that wrote about the Old Folly not JT. Now don’t you get him more confused than he is. He is very old you know and lives in London. I think he has brain rot from all the smog either that or drinking that rotten beer. Get yer self some decent beer JT, like Newcastle Brown Ale.
John Billett // August 16, 2009 at 7:18 pm |
Okay Dave H, I will redirect that letter to you. The Old Folly had nothing to do with that old pirate Errol Flynn. Slap wrist time. Be good
JB
JT // August 16, 2009 at 9:10 pm |
Hey Sloop you appear writing to yourself ?
You JB me JT
JT // August 16, 2009 at 4:19 pm |
JB
You’ve lost me. Have I missed something again? Why is your son called Old Folly? Seems a bit rude and he can’t be all that old.
Dave Hutchinson // August 16, 2009 at 10:17 pm |
JT, no problem it’s all fixed now. JB had a senior moment, thats all, just got mixed up a bit. God JB & JT, I hope we have no more “Js” in here I get confused.
JT // August 16, 2009 at 4:28 pm |
Mass desertion from the other blogs. Must be something you said Jack.
Now just: We three from Happidrome, working for the MMG, Ramsbotham, and Enoch and me. Plus Sylvia.
Is there a song about Sylvia?
Jack Madron // August 16, 2009 at 6:28 pm |
Yes JT.
Sylvia’s Mother. By band called Doctor Hook.
Jack Madron // August 16, 2009 at 6:32 pm |
Also, probably something I said.
JT // August 16, 2009 at 9:07 pm |
Sylvias Mum
Dave H // August 17, 2009 at 1:42 am |
JT, I saw that guy who was singing, he was down town yesterday looking for returnable bottles in garbage cans.
JT // August 16, 2009 at 5:09 pm |
Jack, Dave and John B the MMG 3
Hey John B aren’t you a sloop or summat ?
JT // August 16, 2009 at 5:12 pm |
Hi Sloop
Dave H // August 17, 2009 at 1:50 am |
This one is for Jack. Did you ever see her again Jack? She latched on to me after you left.
Jack Madron // August 17, 2009 at 2:40 pm |
Dave.
Notice those waves rolling in on the beach but hardly any movement in the palm trees. If that was Jamaica, it must have been on the south coast.
Jack Madron // August 17, 2009 at 2:43 pm |
PS.
Down the way, where the nights are GAY. Couldn’t sing that now. You’d have Fluffy after you.
JT // August 17, 2009 at 8:16 am |
Dave
Who was she?
Dave H // August 17, 2009 at 5:18 pm |
JT. I’m not daft enough to mention names on here. Good grief man
JT // August 17, 2009 at 6:57 pm |
Dave
You can mention names here and be confident that the info will be confidential. No Names No Pack Drill etc
What colour was she by the way ?
Dave H // August 18, 2009 at 12:30 am |
JT does it matter what colour, all the same in the dark.
JT // August 17, 2009 at 10:03 am |
Trivia
When we joined the army 52/53 there was still food rationing in UK. Bread was not rationed until after the War and bread rationing coupons were called BU’s.
Not many bay windows in those days.
Jack Madron // August 17, 2009 at 2:52 pm |
JT.
I can remember having leave from Germany and being issued with some sort of ration card. Being a Regular, we had three weeks leave at a time. I got caught up in the worst smog on record in London when returning from my first leave from Minden. Sunday. December 12th 1952. Never forget it.
JT // August 17, 2009 at 3:56 pm |
Jack
A foggy day
Dave H // August 17, 2009 at 5:26 pm |
Its a foggy day in the Jamaica blog, I got lost in there a minute ago.
Dave H // August 17, 2009 at 5:21 pm |
JT, doesn’t that tell yer something like, (stop eating bread and lose the bay window).
JT // August 17, 2009 at 6:39 pm |
Dave
Yes of course you are right re bay windows. Shall I give up the bread or the wine? Please don’t say both. Miserable sod. Typical Canadian now?
When I lived there women not allowed in bars (only in “the lounge”). No booze on Sundays. In Vancouver the big rush on Sunday mornings to Bellingham, Washington State for a drink. Bit like the Ossie 6 o’clock gulp which Derek might remember.
Even the Penthouse Club closed Sundays. Gave the Family time to get rid of the bodies of the week perhaps.
JT // August 17, 2009 at 3:39 pm |
Jack
Correct, you had a ration card to give to your mother. Also Ration Allowance of so much a day. 4/6? a week or was it a day? Plus Rail Warrant.
Never had it so good since.
Jack Madron // August 17, 2009 at 9:15 pm |
JT.
I’ll take your word for all that info. All I remember is the travel warrant.
You’re right about, Never had it so good. I preferred Germany to West Indies.
JT // August 17, 2009 at 7:20 pm |
Billy Boy
Give us a hand here. Ration allowance 1952/53?
John Billett // August 17, 2009 at 8:06 pm |
Question
JT, you asked me a question the other day. Until I know what you’re talking about I can’t answer it. If you would be good enough to explain what you mean by the word (sloop) then I can answer your question.
JT // August 17, 2009 at 9:02 pm |
John Billet = John B
Sloop John B ? Its a song
JT // August 17, 2009 at 9:04 pm |
John B
Click the JT link
JT // August 17, 2009 at 9:27 pm |
Never mind all that. What about this one. No wonder that L/Cpl Bear never came back.
Little shit.
Dave H // August 17, 2009 at 9:55 pm |
For Jack and Swanny, does it bring back memories lads?
ED: URLs are removed from body text. See earlier remarks advising placement.
Jack Madron // August 17, 2009 at 10:50 pm |
Sorry Dave.
After my time, I’m afraid. Vera Lynn and Ann Shelton were more my era. Not my favourites mind. More into Doris Day, Rosemary Clooney and Teresa Brewer. The Andrew Sisters were pretty good as well.
Dave H // August 18, 2009 at 12:27 am |
I’m not talking about the singers Jack, just the song.
Dave H // August 18, 2009 at 12:32 am |
Quote ED: URLs are removed from body text. See earlier remarks advising placement.
Do I run round the square with rifle above my head, or do I have to use the mmg minus the tripod I hope.
ED Reply: No Dave, just trying to keep everyone in step – you know – left, right, left, right. Just trying also to keep harmony with the (free) WordPress servers
JT // August 18, 2009 at 5:29 pm |
Talking about keeping step .On the approach to Albert Bridge over Thames there is a small sign
” Marching Troops Break Step”
A relic from Victorias Army
JT // August 18, 2009 at 7:31 am |
Dave
One or two clips specially for you in your very own Geordie accent.
JT // August 18, 2009 at 7:38 am |
Dave
Pure nostalgia for you
JT // August 18, 2009 at 8:21 am |
Geordies Bless em
John Billett // August 18, 2009 at 10:11 am |
Thanks JT, for clearing that up. I knew what I had done as soon as I submitted the letter, but then it was too late to cancel. So in future I will be known as SLOOP – thats fine, bear with me a bit longer and I will get better.
Thanks again take care.
John Billett // August 18, 2009 at 10:23 am |
Hey guys, how about some calypsos like “Hold him Joe” or “Gwendolin is mad with Kitchener because he didnt get back earlier” or “I want what you gave my Daddy last night”, just a thought.
ED: Housekeeping JB. In the process of you’re ‘getting better’ you’ll observe (if you browse ALL the Blog Titles) that we have a blog named “Nostalgia Toons” etc. The benefit of using this particular blog is that a listed title is placed at immediate page header view and not lost in a myriad of ‘linked’ comments that get replaced in succession, if you do an individual link to a You Tube clip.
Also, I note that you have misinterpreted my guidance to alter your Proper Name – i.e. John Billett with a capital “J and B” in the Comment Box space. If you do this once, any subsequent posting will automatically pick it up. You do then not need to preface your text with “Author JB/Comment” etc. Geddit?
JT // August 18, 2009 at 11:29 am |
Sloop
Ed reminds us that the Nostalgia Toons got quite a bit of interest with lads recommending their old favourites. In those days Derek had to do the links for us (before we was edificated by him). Good old Barry got really into it (don’t mean OLD Barry).
ED: Yeah well! Before you all get excited about placing Ole Nostalgia You Tube clips behind your ID in the Comment Block, just remember that we load Comments in sequential – date received – order. That effectively means that your referred (linked) Nostalgia Ole Toon will get overtaken by newer pages. Anyone looking for a particular Clip will have a helluva task.
Your requested Nostalgia Old Toons lists the You Tube link by Song Title and Artist. Try not to re-invent the wheel – remember – “Horses for Courses”. If you don’t use it – you lose it! Geddit?
JT // August 18, 2009 at 12:06 pm |
Sloop
Did you get a demob suit?
JT // August 18, 2009 at 12:13 pm |
On another challenging intellectual puzzle which continues to haunt me. Even this morning it got me.
Why is it apparently a law of nature that:
Boat mooring ropes
Garden hoses
Vacuum cleaner cables
Long dog leads
Without fail snag on something when you aren’t watching? and why do we never learn this?
Dave H // August 18, 2009 at 5:35 pm |
JT, it must be just you as I never have any problems. But there again I don’t have a boat or a dog or a vacum cleaner and I have automatic garden sprinklers. So there.
Dave H // August 18, 2009 at 5:37 pm |
So, get rid of Doggies, pave the garden, put in laminate floors and sink the boat
JT // August 18, 2009 at 5:40 pm |
Thanks Dave practical as ever.
Did you like the Geordie clips ?
Dave H // August 18, 2009 at 11:15 pm |
As they say here JT, you’re welcome. No I forgot to look shall look when I quit bugging you OK?
Dave H // August 18, 2009 at 11:37 pm |
JT, I don’t talk like Sexist Sid. I’m not a Geordie or a coal minor, just a country farm lad.
JT // August 18, 2009 at 6:58 pm |
Hey dis blog. We cookin on gas man. F…knows what this means but it sounds good innit ?
Ah loorves the smell of blanco in the mornin’
Dave H // August 18, 2009 at 11:22 pm |
You are right JT, this blog is just a smoking, the other fence sitters don’t know what they are missing.
John Billett // August 18, 2009 at 7:11 pm |
JT, I had the same suit when I came out as the one I had when I went in, me birthday suit. I wasn’t in during the war. I see you’re still entertaining Sylvia between you, a girl in a million.
JB.
JT // August 18, 2009 at 7:22 pm |
Sloop
Re Demob suits. Jack and me got them. I chose gaberdine raincoat, pork pie hat, sports jacket, grey trousers, brogue shoes. Looked a right prat. Everyone else were Teddy Boys
Jack probably chose Newlyn hard weather gear. Sou’wester, seaboots, seagoing stuff as he was probably thinking of going deep sea fishing like his folks. Looked a right prick at the Palais de Dance in Penzance though doing hand jive.
Jack Madron // August 18, 2009 at 8:10 pm |
JT.
Winter Gardens not Palais.
JT // August 18, 2009 at 7:11 pm |
Sloop
Sugar, Love,Oboe , Oboe, Peter how do you read me over ?
Just showing off my radio operator skills using the phonetic alphabet of my time at Catterick 1953
Typical response ” Cant hear you f……..k off”
Hope you do not reply in this vein. Dave would of course but he went native in BC long ago.
John Billett // August 18, 2009 at 7:19 pm |
JT, coming in loud and clear, show off. My brain must be worse than I thought, my workmate used to sing it when it came on radio back then.
J B.
Jack Madron // August 18, 2009 at 7:46 pm |
JB.
Looked up “Hold Him Joe” on You Tube. Found that one but not the others.
JT and I both got demob suits. Probably because we were both Regulars. Admittedly, I was only short term.
Jack Madron // August 18, 2009 at 8:07 pm |
Willie and the Hand Jive. The Johnny Otis Show.
YouTube.
JT // August 18, 2009 at 8:55 pm |
Thought Sloop was a regular. NS did not get demob suits of course. They were lucky to get fed.
John Billett // August 18, 2009 at 8:30 pm |
Jack and JT. I was and still am a Nat King Cole nut, can’t think any one can really take his place. I like quite a bit of other singers. Slim Whitman, Tony Bennett, Perry Como. I could go on and on. I’ve been on TOONS – heard a few, not many I don’t like, certainly takes you back.
SWANNY SWANSON // August 19, 2009 at 9:14 am |
Hi All. I wondered were all the banter had gone. Had mail from Margaret saying I had gone quiet? I had looking at most of our blogs Zilch! Now I know were you have been, will catch up with you now I know were you are HA-HA.
Hope all who had Keith’s DVD enjoyed it, Terry’s Drill Parade was BRILL! You could feel the presence of HR saying WHAT A BLOODY SHOWER!
Jack Madron // August 19, 2009 at 4:30 pm |
Hi Swanny,
Hope you booked into the guardroom at 0914 hrs this morning. We weren’t hiding away from the other blogs (well JT might have been) just letting somebody else get on. No luck so far.
JT // August 19, 2009 at 1:27 pm |
Hi Swanny
Yes this is where we are. The old lags. Leaving space on the other blogs for new blood. Wondered where you had got to.
JT // August 19, 2009 at 1:44 pm |
Swanny
This is what you missed. Look what L/Cpl Bear sent us.
John Billett // August 19, 2009 at 2:52 pm |
Hi Swanny, I had a look at Old Toons saw you couldn’t spell the title of your favourite toon, so with the aid of my tape I posted it there for you, hard to say let alone spell.
JB.
JT // August 19, 2009 at 7:13 pm |
Hey Sloop
You are getting very good with this stuff. Learning the lingo also.
Smart Ass
John Billett // August 19, 2009 at 7:38 pm |
Just doing my level best, got to keep sweet with my old camrades as it were JT. I try to be a smart ass some times but I usually put me foot in it. Hope you’ve had a good day so far.
Dave Hutchinson // August 19, 2009 at 8:56 pm |
JB. If you put your foot in it, tell JT to poop & scoop will ya. Bloody dogs, not the 4 legged kind, the 2 legged kind.
Dave Hutchinson // August 19, 2009 at 8:58 pm |
Now I’m off to see whats for tea.
JT // August 20, 2009 at 11:30 am |
Dave
How coz and British. “Whats for tea” ? Did you have fairy cakes with the lumberjacks?
Dave H // August 20, 2009 at 5:13 pm |
No JT, I just had the fairy and she tasted WOW man.
Acting Brig. General Ted Bear // August 20, 2009 at 12:04 am |
Psssst
Wanna see some dirty pictures? Click the link.
Back in the Sudan, guys. Been on an advisory trip to OZ to update the growing Mossie population on cool fabrics. But still working up a sweat under these old fashioned burkhas here. Not easy to stay concealed now in all this see through underwear stuff. Still – duty must be done! Stay tuned!
JT // August 20, 2009 at 6:36 am |
L/Cpl Bear
Well I for one am not in the least impressed by this little sod and his silly so called promotion. He was and is a L/Cpl who should be returned to UK for Court Martial.
Following recent news stories of the Frogs banning mini burkhas and comments on this blog Teddy Boy emerges once again boasting about his cushy little number.
It would be interesting to know whether our MOD is subsidizing his salary.
Ted Bear aka Biggus Dickus // August 20, 2009 at 8:17 am |
PROMOTION EARNED AS A ROMAN CENTURION
JT, Seeing that I was involved in the apprehension of Brian, Kitchener offered me a field promotion in recognition of me going to places where no man has gone before.
JT // August 20, 2009 at 10:30 am |
L/Cpl Bear
Acting bullshit more like. Blimey, looking at the picture if that’s the best bird you have pulled since your secondment you are very welcome to stay there, whatever rank you claim.
ED: Yeah I agree JT, pretty rank!
Ted Bear, Kitchener's Best // August 20, 2009 at 4:57 am |
JUST POPPING OVER TO MALAYSIA
I’ve just been seconded to the Sharia Court to make sure all the vibrators are turned off during the caning. I’ve been instructed also, to make sure there’s no gender benders under the burkhas – hard to tell from the outside! Should be a fun day!
JT // August 20, 2009 at 6:50 am |
Stone Me as Tony Hancock used to say
Rev B Maltravers ex RN // August 20, 2009 at 7:08 am |
Dear Boys
Well personally I think the idea of a vibrators with a good caning sounds delicious. I will certainly suggest something along these lines when the Verger comes this week for “Monopoly” (His wife has gone to Butlins for a week). Skegness or some ghastly place.
Love Fluffy
JT // August 20, 2009 at 7:00 pm |
Fluffy
Well I must say you get full marks for trying. But I doubt that Dave will send you the fare to visit him in Canada.
Also to be honest I don’t think Dog Patch BC is your cup of tea. I think they probably have a hunting season for gays (like for example 2 mule deer or 1 moose per season)
How did you get on surfer watching in Newquay this year ?
Dave H // August 20, 2009 at 8:50 pm |
JT there is no limit on Gays. Bag all you want. I think there is even a bounty, $50 per head. Hard to find though, they kinda go to ground during the season.
Rev B Maltravers ex RN // August 20, 2009 at 8:05 am |
Hi Dave
Love
Fluffy
Dave H // August 20, 2009 at 8:52 pm |
Fluffy. Get Stuffed! Go and have a circle jerk maybe JT will join you with your Verger friend.
SWANNY SWANSON // August 20, 2009 at 11:00 am |
JT, Jack. Just to say you 3 year bods got your demob suits etc. Just give a thought about us regular TA soldiers who mostly did 24 years plus. I still had my blue brothel creepers that Jock Massie gave me a mouthful for wearing HA HA. Some glad I am on this site with all the regular bloggers and having banter!
ED: Prober ‘ansome m’dear.
JT // August 20, 2009 at 5:31 pm |
Swanny
Excuse me. I was a 6 year man with 7 on reserves
JT // August 20, 2009 at 11:25 am |
Swanny
Well you couldn’t blame Jock Massie if you turned up for guard mounting wearing those. We all know you always got stick orderly because that young Hossifer liked you but that was definitely taking the piss along with wearing your beret like a tanker.
Dave H // August 20, 2009 at 11:55 pm |
Scotland releases Lockerbie bomber. Now isn’t that a bummer. Poor Old Charlie Manson who I think killed 3 or 4 people. Now that if he killed them and this other joker who killed about 300 gets out – both the bomber and he are nut cases, but hey where is the justice here?
Editor // August 21, 2009 at 12:47 am |
SMOKE & MIRRORS HIDES THE AWFUL REALITY
Never mind all the trivial, diversionary crap – cheps – Grated Britain is in the SHIT, with a capital Poop. Read the state of your economy, hotlinked above.
And be careful what you say in print about your favourite Pollie, bloggers ain’t protected from making felonious comments.
Have a Good Day – as they say in OZ
Dave H // August 21, 2009 at 4:50 am |
Derek, I have never been able to open a .pdf file, whats a pollie? Well here its “Have a Nice Day”, and I think I will tomorrow, its going to be 30 c.
ED: Dave – Pollie = Politician! Your OS should automatically open this .pdf file as a webpage, unless you have your cookie blocked (Mmm, what will JT make of that?)
JT // August 21, 2009 at 6:07 am |
Ed
I think Fluffy might have something to say about Dave’s cookie.
Dave H // August 22, 2009 at 12:19 am |
Derek, cookies blocked? Now give me a hand here, instructions how to unblock them.
ED: Dave, in Internet Explorer V8.0 or a later version try “Internet Options” in the Tools Menu, then “Privacy” option and set the bar to permit a lower level than you have. Also check out your “Pop Up Blocker”. The .pdf file should open as a web page, but alternatively Adobe Reader V9.0 will do.
Dave H // August 22, 2009 at 5:50 am |
Don’t know what is going on here Derek, I lowered that bar and still couldn’t open the file, when I look again the bar had gone back to the original place.
ED: OK Dave, let’s try an alternative route. I’ll email the file to you in a closed email, with the link in the body text. Try 2 options. Click the link to see if it opens and/or cut and paste the URL into your Address Bar. Failing both, I have another option that we’ll try later.
This is probably just an academic exercise, as the URL in question is a highly convoluted spreadsheet for the UK Economy and is mostly gobbledegook apart from the fact that it tells us that Grated Britain is in deep pooh-pooh financially.
JT // August 21, 2009 at 6:48 am |
Smoke and Mirrors
I suppose we are lucky that we cannot hope to understand this crap.
The producers of statistics can prove anything to themselves confident that no one else takes any notice.
One thing for sure is that organizations like this mop up huge amounts of our money. Like the climate change gang of eggheads with their computer models, its BOLLOCKS.
Jack Madron // August 21, 2009 at 2:57 pm |
Smoke and Mirrors.
JT. That didn’t mean a thing to me. All those numbers and graphs didn’t mean sod all to me. I bet every other country in the world is the same except they keep it under their hats.
Will agree there are too many aliens in the country. Bradford, Birmingham, Leicester are full and Earls Court. But there again, the Brits are all over the world so what’s the difference. Personally, I don’t give a damn as long as me and mine are OK.
JT // August 21, 2009 at 8:50 am |
On any given day we can read that the economy is:
Out of recession
Sinking deeper into recession
It will be years before recovery
Housing market improves
Housing market has slumped
Banks are lending again
Banks are still refusing to lend
We are fed so much crap every day.
Also I want to ban “Percentages” . More on this on a later rant.
SWANNY SWANSON // August 21, 2009 at 10:27 am |
Bankers Wankers! Latest, bankers getting lots of lolly again? nothing is ever said about we few that have saved for a rainy day in our retirement are all being hit hardest of all. Our savings are making NIL, with interest rates of zero point 0-1 per cent and us oldens seem to be paying for the riff raff of society getting all the benefits – i.e. no rent, council tax etc. We, like all who saved for a rainy day are penalized. My biggest moan is the illegal immigrants seem to come out on top for Government handouts.
I am the new Victor Meldrum, every time I watch TV this is my biggest hump, why did we ever pay into pension funds etc?
Jack Madron // August 21, 2009 at 1:05 pm |
Swanny.
How dare you call yourself the new Victor Meldrum. I am. There is a Vickers in DCLI Museum Bodmin. I could still use it.
Jack Madron // August 21, 2009 at 1:11 pm |
Swanny.
I meant to use on pollies and such – not you.
Dave H // August 21, 2009 at 5:25 pm |
Maybe you could Jack, but you would have to stand up or you would never get back up.
JT // August 21, 2009 at 12:19 pm |
Swanny
Dead right. Bastards. Even Premium Bonds are only paying out peanuts, (monkeynuts). We have to stop watching TV unless they bring back Magic Roundabout.
Forget newspapers get the Beano.
Jack Madron // August 21, 2009 at 1:08 pm |
Ronnie Biggs is now getting state pension and who is paying to keep his son in this country? He’s a bloody Brazilian.
JT // August 21, 2009 at 5:01 pm |
Jack
Biggs junior automatically gets UK citizenship as he has a Brit daddy. Is Ronnie better or worse than the average MP or Fat Cat Banker taking million in bonuses?
The couple sent down for torturing that baby will be be out on the streets in 7 years or less.
Jack Madron // August 21, 2009 at 8:00 pm |
JT.
You’re right about Biggs but the others should dance on the end of a rope as far as I’m concerned but I didn’t make the laws. Unfortunately.
SWANNY SWANSON // August 21, 2009 at 2:10 pm |
Consolation Prize. Now we have sent back the Libyan Bomber we will all get free oil from there! Our biggest problem to date is that we can’t get rid of that one handed CLAW from prison to be extradited to the US? Why is it there seems to be laws for some and not others? He is still preaching hatred from inside our prison, where’s the logic in that? If they signed up a couple of us vets we could do the Country a favour for zilch and save millions of £s.
Jack Madron // August 21, 2009 at 3:00 pm |
I earned crossed rifles and I’m not blind. Yet.
JT // August 21, 2009 at 6:59 pm |
Jack
Er, what are you on about ?
Jack Madron // August 21, 2009 at 7:47 pm |
JT.
Swanny said about signing up we vets to save a few million so I volunteered. I can still use a rifle.
JT // August 21, 2009 at 8:12 pm |
Jack
Oh OK. Will you be using the trusty SMLE .303 or one of those modern jobbies that look like Meccano with built on telescopic sight?
JT // August 21, 2009 at 8:17 pm |
Jack
Dave is right. Firing from a prone position might be uncomfortable bay window wise. P’raps you could get someone to dig you a little tummy pit.
You will have to clear it with Elf and Safe T.
Editor // August 23, 2009 at 12:23 am |
The ‘EFF BEE AII’ says it all for us.
Read the latest reaction to this fucking outrage by the Scots Government (so-called). Me, I’m pouring all my fucking cases of Scotch down the fucking drain and swapping over to Penzance Panther Piss! On second thoughts maybe I’ll just give up grouse shooting at Balmoral.
Pricks!
Editor // August 23, 2009 at 12:52 am |
POWER CORRUPTS – ABSOLUTE POWER CORRUPTS ABSOLUTELY
As ‘Ole Harold said in the ’50s. Grated Britain, you never had it so good.
Volunteers required to strap this arsehole over the muzzle of the cannon! Can there really be a God?
Jack Madron // August 23, 2009 at 2:55 pm |
I bet Mandy’s grandfather is spinning in his grave.
Editor // August 23, 2009 at 3:04 am |
HEV A KANGA BANGA – CHEPS
Reduce your carbon footprint too!
See ya at the barbie with a pot of Penzance Panther Piss!
JT // August 23, 2009 at 5:06 am |
Ed
Crikey Ed, did you run out of medication again?
Jack Madron // August 23, 2009 at 2:18 pm |
They forgot to say, it also puts a spring in your step.
JT // August 23, 2009 at 5:09 am |
We are hoping that Ed will send us regular Kanga food parcels when he has figured a way of doing so. Elf n Safe T wise
Dave H // August 23, 2009 at 5:35 pm |
JT he can send you some Roo Jerky or jerk off whatever
JT // August 23, 2009 at 5:11 am |
But a similar idea for us is Wabbits.
Jack Madron // August 23, 2009 at 2:22 pm |
JT.
You’re getting earlier and earlier. Can’t you turn your alarm clock off ?
Dave H // August 23, 2009 at 5:37 pm |
I think JT ran out of Depends so he has to get go pee pee
JT // August 23, 2009 at 6:38 pm |
Dave
Well I don’t know what “Depends” are but you are on the right track.
How often do you take them and what do they do? Hope they don’t react with those little blue pills you buy on the internet. Your thingy won’t know whether you are coming or going. Therein madness lies.
Dave Hutchinson // August 23, 2009 at 7:18 pm |
JT. God we Canadians have heducate you lot over there. Depends are old peoples, diapers or nappies, as you lot call them. Now smarten up. I bet Jack knew what they were. Oh and I don’t need any little blue pills yet, I’m not as old as you, mine works pretty good. Hope Fluffy doesn’t read this.
Editor // August 23, 2009 at 10:54 pm |
NO SEX THANKS – WE’RE MUSLIM
But murder, mayhem, anarchy and terrorism are OK!
Quote “The ninth month of the Muslim calendar, Ramadan marks the time more than 1,400 years ago when the first words of Islam’s holy book, the Koran, are believed to have been revealed to the Prophet Muhammad. During this month, the gates of heaven are said to open and the gates of hell are closed. The world’s estimated one billion observant Muslims will abstain from food, smoking and sex during the daylight hours and hold extra prayers at night.” Endquote
JT // August 24, 2009 at 9:42 am |
Rant
Hundreds of children are being bought in Romania and suchlike and brought to Britain on false documents then rented to illegal immigrants who claim them as their own, claim and benefits including a free house moving to the top of the social housing ladder displacing Brits which have been on the waiting list for years. A woman with 3 kids with say one with disability (deliberately caused) can get about £30,000 per year including rent allowance
One woman has just received £24,000 in back claims. A percentage is paid to the traffickers some a re multi millionaires back in Eastern Europe. This scam alone is costing MILLIONS of £’s
Also there are gangs of women begging in streets of London and on trains. They each have a baby which appears to sleep all the time. At the end of their shift they hand the baby to the next shift. These babies are also bought in Romania etc
The police and social services do f….k all about it
Its discrimination innit? Fat cat crooked lawyers are happy to get legal aid to defend them in cases which alone can cost millions and last for years. Meantime the defendants have disappeared into the woodwork. The so called “BORDER” police and Immigration service are a bunch of useless wankers.
We should get out of Human rights Law and EU Law. Its f…..g crazy.
ED: Can of worms?
SWANNY SWANSON // August 24, 2009 at 9:55 am |
JT. Brilliant wording. I endorse all you have said, two years ago no matter which town or city you visited there were these bloody woman with so called babies. When my daughter lived in Eire there were literally 100s of these woman all over the Country, doing exactly the same thing. Why are the powers to be not to know this? I have been in several Muslim countries but you never see this happening in any of them, we in the UK are the biggest Mugs in Europe. How do these crooked lawyers get away with it.
JT // August 24, 2009 at 4:10 pm |
More Ranting
I don’t blame the poor buggers who try to live here rather than the shit countries they come from where there governments are even more corrupt and stupid then ours. But they are scrambling to get to an overcrowded lifeboat.
The problem lies with the many thousands of jobsworths employed in government departments. (Plus 900,000) since Labour came into power they have no real work to do. These departments are basically entirely useless and just go through the motions. Many are Asians with not much command of English and not much sympathy for the native Brits. (Talked to anyone on the phone from Inland Revenue recently ?)
Then there are the ones in all departments with crap degrees in sociology trying to be clever. Shuffling forms about and being unpleasant to any member if the public who approaches them.
Look at the latest scandal with MOD Procurement; wastage of BILLIONS.
Lets face it, if you create a department to monitor racism why are we surprised when they trot out idiotic stuff like banning the saying “Whiter than White” or “Black Mark” (True). This is an insult to the black people they are supposed to be helping.
Elf and Safe T inspectors. Tattooed, much pierced lesbians going about in pairs with clipboard being a f….ng nuisance and talking garbage.
Well thats enough for today I suppose. Wait for tonights latest bad news. MPs are still on hols of course. “Jeeze “as Dave would say
Dave H // August 24, 2009 at 11:45 pm |
Tattooed, much pierced lesbians going about in pairs with clipboard being a f….ng nuisance and talking garbage.
JT, you been into some rotten weed? Geeze talking about lesbians and such things. Fluffy where are ya?
JT // August 24, 2009 at 6:31 pm |
Name a religion that discriminates against people of other faiths e.g forbids interfaith marriage. Particularly women. Has their own exclusive schools. The more orthodox wearing long beards and funny clothes. Bang their heads against a wall. Kills animals by cutting their throats. Have strict fasting periods. Is homophobic
Dave H // August 24, 2009 at 11:39 pm |
JT, The Catlick religion, many moons ago I was seeing this gal who was Catholic, her Mommy soon sorted her out for going out with me as I was of course not of their religion. So endeth that romance.
JT // August 25, 2009 at 6:30 am |
Dave
Correct . Also the Jewish religion and there are probably more.
JT // August 25, 2009 at 9:13 am |
Dave
Well I am not too sure about the Catholics other than they are Anti Abortion, Anti Birth Control, Homophobic, Anti Protestant (hence your own little trouble). On a happier note, They don’t do Halal or Kosher butchery or suicide bombing.
But the priests don’t have a very good record regarding small boys.
Dave H // August 25, 2009 at 4:58 pm |
Nor do they over here also JT. But why do you think they go into that profession in the first place. Bunch of Kiddy Diddlers.
SWANNY SWANSON // August 24, 2009 at 8:48 pm |
JT. You and I think very much the same? Our country has lost the plot. As I am always saying, no matter who rings you up, it is nearly always someone with an Asian accent. I can’t bloody understand what they are saying half the time, whether it’s BT, Tiscali, Talk Talk, its always the same, seems to be via India etc. Seems these days it’s like an Irish Parliament all talking and nothing happening. This is the Meldrew in me. Still John it gives us something to beef about.
ED:
Q. What is Irish diplomacy?
A. It’s the ability to tell a man to go to hell.
So that he will look forward to making the trip
Ted Bear, Kitchener's Best // August 24, 2009 at 9:35 pm |
CANING CANCELLED
Looks like I’m being recalled from Malaysia with the event cancelled. Evidently an hour in a closed van with 6 sweaty bearded coppers from the Sharia Police, did the trick. Stand by for more assignment reports, seems as if there’s a small discrimination matter in the British Inland Revenue (see JT’s comment above). What’s the bet that I’ll be shoved off there for undercover work?
ED: WATCH THIS MUST SEE VIDEO CLIP The Labour Government is effectively condoning Sharia Law in Britain by its own ineffectiveness and breach of existing British Laws.
A Pullthrew // August 25, 2009 at 1:50 pm |
Dear Boggs
This sharia stuff. Wexl I as=.ked the bird in the blacl tent in the ;ibrary if she fancied a bit of caning. and she called that other bird with the short purple hair and safety pins ni her eyeborows and nose and lips who thre me out.
being an pld squaddie I dont see why there is such a problem .
We had a PTI who used to cane some recruits on their bare bums in the abklutions . He seemed to loke it and he stood them to double agg and chips in the Naafi afterwards. Its what they call nowedays a win win siyuation
Isee somr of the wrds dont look so good. Its me typing. I get no help- on the library comouter
I dont think they like me mucj
TTFN
JT // August 25, 2009 at 6:38 am |
Ed
The clip is a must see. Thanks
JT // August 25, 2009 at 2:12 pm |
A former mayor of a Lancashire Town has been charged with breaking into houses and stealing womens knickers. We must ask ourselves, is this a breach of his ‘uman rights?
ED:
A Lancashire Mayor’s pinched some knickers
That’s created a storm midst some snickers.
One wonders what’s next
To cause locals much vext
P’raps he dresses to thrill local Vicars.
JT // August 26, 2009 at 1:46 pm |
Ed
A moving piece of poetry.
Dave H // August 25, 2009 at 11:49 pm |
Maybe he got his knickers in a twist.
Editor // August 26, 2009 at 3:45 am |
YOUR PRESENCE IS REQUESTED. LT.COL. AJ MARSH BLOG
Recent image updates still continue on this blog, following contact with Will Marsh, grandson to our C.O.
Also fresh images obtained by Keith Mannings this month of August 2009, from the Maritime Museum, showing the Major, Princess Margaret and others from the 1954-1957 posting, are shortly to be uploaded.
Additionally, an important solution to an acronym is sought by a Military Historian in Eire, who is compiling a data base of Bermuda British and Commonwealth grave markers. Kindly attend when convenient.
JT // August 26, 2009 at 7:19 pm |
Billy Boy we know you are out there coz of your emails. Kindly report to the Guard Commander
JT // August 27, 2009 at 11:49 am |
Once again we get the meeja interested in the atrocities committed in NHS Hospitals. Once again we get idiotic comments from readers like “but when I was in hospital I got wonderful treatment”
THIS DOES NOT EXCUSE THE THOUSANDS OF HELPLESS ELDERLY PATIENTS LEFT DYING OF BEDSORES AND DEHYDRATION IN THEIR OWN SHIT or hospital acquired infections because filthy staff just will not wash their hands and the cleaners are a joke aimlessly shoving around a filthy mop.
Royal College of Nursing:
“The vast majority of nurses are dedicated wonderful professionals”
BUT, YOU ASSHOLES WHAT ABOUT A SIZABLE MINORITY WHO ARE NO BETTER THAN SADISTIC TORTURERS EVEN REFUSING TO ADMINISTER PAIN RELIEF
Hospital doctors are often no better and in fact even MORE guilty if that is possible poncing about the wards preening themselves and showing off to the giggling nurses. Usually ignoring the poor suffering victims other than making clever jokes.
And Hey guys when they refer to “ELDERLY ” THEY MEAN US.
GET MAD
Dave H // August 27, 2009 at 6:09 pm |
Wow JT, you are ugly this morning, didn’t you get any last night? I thought the hospitals were bad here but compared to what I just read, they are like a holiday camp.
Jack Madron // August 27, 2009 at 1:20 pm |
NHS. Councils. Railways. Gas. Electricity. All with the same problem. Too many chiefs and not enough indians. NHS Trusts. Who in hell TRUSTs them? I don’t.
Editor // August 27, 2009 at 3:08 pm |
NOTE CHANGES
Picasa Albums have been moved to a new location and placed together on one blog page. Check out Blog Titles at home page header.
Dave H // August 27, 2009 at 6:12 pm |
Geeeeez you are worse that the grocery stores here, they are always moving things around, can’t find a blood thing, then when you do find it, the next week its moved again. Have A Nice Day
JT // August 27, 2009 at 6:30 pm |
Dave
The plan is to keep you old geezers active. Helps to stop you staring into space and rattling your dentures.
Jack Madron // August 27, 2009 at 9:44 pm |
JT.
I guess rattling dentures is the same as rattling chicken bones or juju sticks.
I often stare into space. Knowing damn well there’s more life out there than in Parliament.
Dave H // August 28, 2009 at 5:48 am |
Jack, you guys have it made in the UK with all the perks, free passes, good pensions, help with your heating bills in the winter, (you should see mine), free health care and goodness knows what else. I wonder if I would get a free house if I came back. As for your Government, we will exchange you, it can’t be worse than ours, they are all dick heads, and crooks, give goverment contracts to their friends worth millions.
Jack Madron // August 28, 2009 at 5:03 pm |
Dave.
We don’t get free health care. We pay National Insurance stamps every week when we’re working. Of course, there are some who never work and get everything but there’ll always be some skiving sods. We had them in the army, if you remember rightly.
Dave H // August 28, 2009 at 12:55 am |
JT, I’m active. Hey you don’t see a bay window on this lad, (well not a big one).
SWANNY SWANSON // August 28, 2009 at 2:09 pm |
All. In answer to JT re the NHS, I can only speak for myself, but as you all know I spent the most of last year in and out of hospital. I only had a couple of gripes about how I was treated, 99 and three quarter % were brilliant with me, only a couple of wards I was on were a little bit lax. As you know only big beef I had was with one outside staff nurse was trained by Waffen SS! So on the whole I was treated very well.
There was a case in our local paper yesterday of a girl who went to the same school as me who had heart problems and she was on a trolly for 15 hrs so I know where JT is coming from. But the Yanks were crowing on our media about our health service and there were pictures of the state of health care in the US with scores of patients being treated in like a big aircraft hanger in Afghanistan, so that it proves ours is better than theirs.
Dave H // August 28, 2009 at 6:24 pm |
JT, where in hell are ya? Probably picking up Doggie poop, come on get your neb in on this one, I think all of the bloggers have blogged off
John Billett // August 28, 2009 at 7:42 pm |
Swanny, I suppose with all the hospital treatments it is how you’re treated personally. When I was in our hospital I had good caring treatment, but having said that I did see some bad things happen, I can only speak from experience and say thank God for the NHS.
JT // August 28, 2009 at 8:18 pm |
The point is chaps that there are THOUSANDS of old people left to die or in effect killed in out hospitals. There have been and are thousands of all ages killed by infections due to filthy wards, nurses and equipment
It doesn’t matter a fuck whether you personally were treated OK. That is the precisely the trouble. The Pollies proudly say 93% of patients are treated OK. (people like you guys) But that means 7% – (SEVERAL HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS ARE NOT). Don’t you really see this?.
The NHS hospital caused infection and error deaths are killing more people per month than all monthly British Army deaths from 1939 to 1943.
It doesn’t matter whether we are better or worse than the Americans or the bloody Tibetans. That has fuck all to do with it. Patients are dying every day from starvation and pain so how the fuck does it matter that any of you personally had an OK time?
Dave H // August 29, 2009 at 5:47 am |
JT. Now you have had your rant, do you think those things only happen in the UK? Sad but true, that’s not only happening in hospitals here also, but in the nursing homes. In one instance a carer was cought on camera abusing, punching an old lady, that’s just one instance and one care home.
Dave H // August 29, 2009 at 5:50 am |
I just hope I drop dead of a heart attack before I go into one of those places, that is my greatest fear to end up not being able to care for myself and to be tossed into a home, but I have my trusty insulin to take care of things in case.
JT // August 29, 2009 at 7:07 am |
Dave
Thanks. Yes I am sure it happens everywhere and I share your apprehension.
The point of my rant however is the use of statistics and the weasel use of the dreaded “percentage” which the rats of Pollies use when interviewed. The “Care Minister” was interviewed on TV and although the presenter asked him 3 times ” But how many cases were there ?” He kept saying “but 93% are satisfied” refusing to quantify the 7% remainder
In fact it has been reported that there were over a million compliants of abuse or neglect last year.
Well meaning and fair minded folk who say they were satisfied with their treatment actually help these creeps in their propaganda.
PS: Insulin is not all that reliable. Might just leave you in a coma.
Dave H // August 29, 2009 at 5:39 pm |
I see your point JT. The Pollies as you call them just stick their head in the sand and hope the problems go away or get forgotten about. And oh insulin is very reliable, but make sure you are not found for quite some time, yes you can go into coma but that’s it – brain damage, they pull he plug, It happened to someone I knew, he made sure his gal friend was out of town.
JT // August 29, 2009 at 8:22 pm |
Er Sloop
Blog discipline if you please ?
JT // August 29, 2009 at 8:25 pm |
Dave
There was a case though when some big cheese tried to kill his wife and she was in a coma for years and years. She only just died. Apart from anything else can you imagine being in a coma and having a permanent itch, let alone pain
JT // August 29, 2009 at 8:31 pm |
Dave
Helium gas is the right stuff. Allegedly painless and quick. So what if you sound like the Chipmunks when you say goodbye?
JT // August 29, 2009 at 8:36 pm |
Dave
Chipmunks “You had a Bad Day” .That’ll make em laugh
Sloop JB // August 29, 2009 at 6:33 pm |
Has there been any update on Harry Patch’s memorial service, if anyone has any information I would dearly like to know, so that Peggy and myself can attend to pay our respects.
ED: JB, transfer any further comment to DCLI blog please
JT // August 29, 2009 at 8:26 pm |
Sloop
Sorry, see my reply above
Dave H // August 29, 2009 at 11:54 pm |
Derek, may I ask why those pictures were removed, did someone complain? I say if those pics weren’t doctored, they should remain, some people don’t know whats going on in the UK.
ED: DH, I guess that you are referring to the Muslim protest, which photos were sourced from a guy in Canada. I removed ‘em ‘cos I need to tidy up the header space – no other reason. The clips can be viewed on You Tube (see hotlink). I believe also that the photos are authentic and undoctored too, as I have viewed ‘em on many other sites.
Dave H // August 30, 2009 at 3:38 am |
OK Derek, thanks for the info and as for the Gypo Caravans and Hedgehogs, Sylvia is going to kill ya.
Dave H // August 30, 2009 at 3:53 am |
What do you guys think, all the hype about Ted Kennedy. His father didn’t want the USA to help the Allies in the 2nd World War. How the hell he got to be an ambassador to Britain I will never know, they should have thrown him out of the country; and I’m sure the Kennedy clan supported the I.R.A.
JT // August 30, 2009 at 5:56 am |
Dave
True about old man Joe Kennedy. Also true that Ted Kennedy was probably an IRA supporter. He called the Brit Army an “army of occupation”. He later got into the “Peace process” (he was a Polly after all) Boston was a main funding area for IRA.
Interesting that Martin McGuinness (ex IRA murderer) attends the funeral as the Belfast Representative. He is a Minister of something or other.
Editor // August 30, 2009 at 3:54 am |
RED OR WHITE WINE, JT?
Roast hedgehog: Ingredients – One or more hedgehogs. Long grass to wrap the meat in.
Method
Season the meat. Wrap in the grass, lengthways then crossways. Cook for about two hours for a 2kg joint in a pot on the barbecue. Once the meat has cooked, remove the grass covering and place the joint back on the barbecue to sear the outside. Once the meat has coloured, carve and serve.
“Hedgehog should have its throat cut, be singed and gutted, trussed with a pullet, then pressed in a towel until very dry. Then roast it with carmeline sauce, or in pastry with wild duck sauce. Note that if the hedghog refuses to unroll, put it in hot water, and then it will straighten itself.”
JT // August 30, 2009 at 5:58 am |
Ed
I reckon a gallon jar of Ossie Screech will go down a treat with this delectable dish.
JT // August 30, 2009 at 6:17 pm |
We have to bow to Eds experience in Out Back cuisine. We previously had his advice on Wichitie grubs (As spelled in the Delia cookbook) as a starter or deep fried in Wombat fat as a nourishing main course.
His hedgehog recipe may well be a sign of things to come in the post recession depression. We assume it can also be applied to the domestic cat without the irritating prickly bits .
Editor // August 30, 2009 at 9:47 am |
For Sylvia, click the link.
Enjoy
Sylvia // September 14, 2009 at 12:38 pm |
ED
Thanks for the clip, sorry only just found,
Sloop JB // August 30, 2009 at 10:21 am |
ED JT, sorry chaps, wilco and out.
JT // August 30, 2009 at 6:53 pm |
Don’t think they have hedgehogs in Canada.
Jack Madron // August 30, 2009 at 7:15 pm |
Why are they called hedgehogs? There’s plenty of hedges for all of them.
Dave H // August 31, 2009 at 12:01 am |
JT, there are hedgehogs in Canada but not in the wild, you can buy one in some pet shops, but you have to promise not to cook it before they will sell it to you. They say they make good pets, but I will pass on that, you should get one or 2, cheaper to keep than doggies.
Editor // September 1, 2009 at 4:15 am |
CHIEF LAIRD TERENCE JOLL
We have a celebrity among us lads.
Jack Madron // September 1, 2009 at 11:01 am |
Well done Terry.
Just one question though. How much did the camera man have to drink ? (Or woman)
SWANNY SWANSON // September 1, 2009 at 9:40 am |
Ed, Watched TJ yesterday on You Tube. What a star of Kari-Oki singing like a true Cornishman in front of a big audience and in full Cornish Regalia. Doris and I were so proud of him singing at a venue for his wife’s 70th birthday party. Well done Terry we’re all proud of you. True Janner.
OGGIE–OGGIE.
JT // September 1, 2009 at 7:09 pm |
Important Correction
According to Wikie thing the spelling for the Ossie grub is Wichita which seems odd to me. Furthermore the grubs should be dipped in tempura batter before deep frying.
Jack, I expect you will have something to say about Wichita ? Go on then. Ed will no doubt also comment on this matter
ED: Ahem! Witchetty Grubs
Jack Madron // September 1, 2009 at 9:18 pm |
Just one question JT.
What’s the ingredients of tempura batter ?
JT // September 1, 2009 at 10:33 pm |
Jack
Ha Ha You missed your cue.
Tempura Batter
Egg
Flour
Iced water
Jack Madron // September 2, 2009 at 12:18 pm |
Do you mean Wichita Linesman, JT? We’ve already done that joke.
Why iced water? I’m not in to cooking like you and Dave. Prefer the eating part best.
JT // September 2, 2009 at 5:32 pm |
Jack
I know you did the joke ages ago I just thought it went with the Wichita grubs.
I don’t know why but the iced water seem to be essential they say.
Dave H // September 2, 2009 at 12:00 am |
A better batter is flour, water, some baking soda, not too much and some pepper, that’s a fish & chip batter.
JT // September 2, 2009 at 6:35 am |
Dave
Perhaps your batter is too heavy for the grubs. The iced water is essential for Tempura. So it comes to this, here we are, exchanging recipes like 2 old gals in the Womens Institute blog.
Lets face it the grubs ain’t going to be a family favourite in Dog Patch or Chelsea are they?
Jack Madron // September 2, 2009 at 12:10 pm |
Probably more popular than Chelsea. JT. Or should that be Chelski, as they’re now known.
Dave Hutchinson // September 2, 2009 at 4:44 pm |
Wouldn’t that be Battersea also JT. HA HA
JT // September 2, 2009 at 7:10 pm |
Dave
Well I live in Balham and when I see I am the only white person on a local bus I reckon we might see them in the market soon particularly if they are Halal. But this can only be if their little throats are cut. Bit labour intensive.
We’ ll ask Ed
But they’ll be never be popular in Chelsea with the chinless wonders.
JT // September 2, 2009 at 3:36 pm |
Yes Jack
See what you mean. They are owned by a Russian Grub
SWANNY SWANSON // September 2, 2009 at 4:23 pm |
JT, Jack, 4 games top of the Prem. Man Utd lucky again outplayed by Arsenal won on a fluke own goal, lost to Burnley, really missing the Winker and Chelsea playing super football and havn’t bought anyone in the transfer market. Looking good for we London Blues, and our Russian so pleased the way we are playing.
Jack Madron // September 2, 2009 at 8:42 pm |
Swanny.
Remember the story ’bout the tortoise and the hare. Another old saying from Mousehole is, “Don’t pee until your water comes”.
Jack Madron // September 3, 2009 at 9:27 pm |
Swanny.
FIFA has stopped them doing any transfers.
JT // September 2, 2009 at 5:36 pm |
You guys are really into memory lane on the MMG blog. Thats good. When Sloop gets going perhaps he can remember some blackmail stuff on Hossifers. One in particular (no names no pack drill)
Dave Hutchinson // September 2, 2009 at 10:54 pm |
JT, well at least we have memories, not much to remember about Bermuda, except shilling breasts. The whole bloody island could fit in our local Dog Patch as you call it.
Sloop JB // September 2, 2009 at 5:49 pm |
J T
Remember the three wise monkeys, See nought Hear nought and Say nought
JT // September 2, 2009 at 6:47 pm |
Sloop
Thats you, Jack and Dave ?
Sloop JB // September 2, 2009 at 7:07 pm |
JT
Would they be worth blackmailing?
JT // September 2, 2009 at 7:13 pm |
Not them Sloop, the hossifers. You must have something on em.
Sloop JB // September 2, 2009 at 7:22 pm |
JT
I meant the ossifers, no I have not any dirt to dish out on anyone. Sorry JT you’ll still have to ferret about for extra pennies.
JT // September 3, 2009 at 5:54 am |
Sloop
Oh OK
Back to plan B, rattling a tin on Balham tube station with my dark glasses on. Hoping the wife will let me take one of the dogs.
Editor // September 2, 2009 at 10:44 pm |
LONDON CAB ANYONE?
Just proves that madness is not contained only to British Politicians.
PS: I can only try to elevate the intellectual quality of conversational exchange – tough chance with MMGs bullshitting all day, every day. And that banter about spit and polish and melting in the heat. What a load of crap! We in “A” Coy never stood still long enough for the sun to have any effect, the wind chill factor flowing over our marching feet countered any effect of the sun. That fucking cordite from the Vickers must have had a profound effect on the “S” Coy wallahs!
JT // September 3, 2009 at 7:15 pm |
Ed speaks de trufe.
Oft times when sitting in my little office trying to keep awake til lunchtime and gazing through the open door those little “A” Coy stubble hoppers would whiz past with feet moving like Billy O.
Dave Hutchinson // September 5, 2009 at 5:21 am |
What a load of crap!
Quote: We in “A” Coy never stood still long enough for the sun to have any effect, the wind chill factor flowing over our marching feet countered any effect of the sun. Endquote:
Give me a break. The only marching you lot did was to the Naafi. Jack, did you read that bull, wind chill factor, Ha Ha. Come here and really feel a wind chill factor.
ED: Just knew Old Grizzly would bite – best snapper bite I’ve had all day! Had your cordite today DH?
Editor // September 3, 2009 at 12:01 am |
VEDIC ASTROLOGY FOR THOSE NIT PICKING VIRGOANS AMONG US
To my knowledge the following are to enjoy a birthday this month. Bradshaw, Griffin, Lovemore, Simons. Happy Birthday all, you bunch of anal bastards. Hotlinked prophecy above.
Hope it all comes true!
Tempus Fugit!
Jack Madron // September 3, 2009 at 3:35 pm |
Ed.
If that’s the monthly predictions for Virgo, I’m glad I’m Taurus. Anyhow, for all you chaps who have a birthday this month. Penbloth Lowen Regasbo. (Happy Birthday).
Sloop JB // September 3, 2009 at 10:45 am |
JT
If I happen to be passing by I’ll chuck a few bob in, just don’t sell the dog.
JT // September 3, 2009 at 12:12 pm |
Sloop
Thanks Gov. gawd bless yer.
Sloop JB // September 3, 2009 at 12:45 pm |
JT
You’re welcome.
Editor // September 5, 2009 at 3:20 am |
SEND UP ON AUSSIE (NSW) POLLIES
This week has seen the State Treasurer of NSW resign, because of an extra marital affair made public. This same proclaimed ‘leading light’, with his Federal politician wife, last year bullied the staff of a local Sydney pub, over a trivial matter. “Don’t you know who I am?”
Typically, our media make light of the matter – with some degrees of cynical truth.
Worth a look!
JT // September 5, 2009 at 1:00 pm |
Derek
Great clip. Love to hear the Ossie pollies talk
Editor // September 5, 2009 at 8:40 am |
BILL GRIFFITHS
Just received a return email from Bill, who is poorly and having continuous hospital visits for checkups. Nancy however, is OK and has been home several times and out and about at Bill’s favourite pubs.
Bill is off to Honkers on the 18th Sept for a week with niece Betty, so here’s hoping he’ll return full of vim and vigour and give us a hand to counter the effects of the Dangerous Cordite Gang.
Jack Madron // September 5, 2009 at 12:53 pm |
Get well soon, Bill. You’re sorely needed on here by some, who need you against the DCG. Glad to hear Nancy is a lot better.
All the best, mate.
JT // September 5, 2009 at 1:02 pm |
Jack
Wots a DCG?
ED: Dangerous Cordite Gang, JT. Them fuckers wots allus sniffing cordite and spreading bullshit!
JT // September 5, 2009 at 12:56 pm |
Billy Boy
Have a great trip. Its great that you can make such a long journey.
SWANNY SWANSON // September 5, 2009 at 2:01 pm |
Hi Bill, sorry to hear you have not been well, hope you and your niece have a good trip to Hong Kong, glad to hear Nancy is going on OK. This should do you good, bon voyage.
Neil and Doris.
ED: Thanks for those words Swanny, Bill will be pleased to hear from you. His niece Betty, is in Honkers.
JT // September 5, 2009 at 4:53 pm |
My South African enterprise looks as if its going down the drain. I must tell them to start filling in that f….g great hole.
Ah well “Muck to Muck in 2 generations” as they say.
Barry Cornish // September 5, 2009 at 5:09 pm |
Hi John,
I am sorry to hear your news. That is a problem that you could well do without.
Kindest regards,
from,
Barry.
JT // September 5, 2009 at 7:07 pm |
Thanks Barry
I blame Cecil Rhodes.
How are you? long time no contact. Blogs seem to be gaining a bit of strength. One or two new victims I see.
Barry Cornish // September 5, 2009 at 7:45 pm |
Hi John,
I am fine, thanks. However, Nora has been really ill with a severe chest infection for the last five weeks but refused to go to hospital. I have been nurse and provider of ‘room service’, as well as running the house, so I have not had an opportunity to keep up with the blogs. She has just completed her fourth course on antibiotics and seems to be ‘turning the corner’ now. I am glad that I have found you all again in your new location and am enjoying the photos which Derek has put on Picasa.
JT // September 6, 2009 at 4:10 am |
I knew I shouldn’t have bought it there were no f….g diamonds left
Barry Cornish // September 5, 2009 at 4:55 pm |
Hi Bill,
I do hope that your health holds out and you enjoy the trip.
With Best Wishes from,
Barry.
SWANNY SWANSON // September 6, 2009 at 9:23 am |
Ed. Didn’t think when I sent Bill a message, that Bill’s niece lived in Hong Kong. What a man he is, to fly out there is no mean feat at his age. As you know Doris and I flew to Borneo and OZ in 1995 two days flying. As you well know Derek it is a very tiring journey, especially at Bill’s age, but it will hopefully do him good to have a break.
Not too much Tiger beer Bill.
JT // September 6, 2009 at 2:59 pm |
Col G of Libya is an international treasure. When the Swiss arrested one of his sons for assault he arrested two Swisses. Then he demanded via the UN that Switzerland be dismantled and divided between its neighbours.
S’truth; better not mess with this dude.
SWANNY SWANSON // September 6, 2009 at 5:10 pm |
JT. We should take a leaf out of his book in UK do tit for tat to illegal immigrants, no such luck we are such dopes in our country we still look after them in their own country and still pay for them.
JT // September 6, 2009 at 8:09 pm |
Look at the size of British Army commitments in 1952
Editor // September 7, 2009 at 7:07 am |
THE UK PARLIAMENT LIMPS ON
Here you have it – straight from the horse’s mouth. A bunch of limp dicks?
Jack Madron // September 7, 2009 at 4:22 pm |
Notice that this is the unelected House of Lords. Good old Democracy.
SWANNY SWANSON // September 7, 2009 at 9:42 am |
All. In the papers again today, the government has spent 495,000 on snooping on wounded soldiers for feigning their injuries sustained in battle? It makes your blood boil for these bastards who send our brave men to fight on behalf of our Country. How many politicians would do their job fighting in one of hardest wars in our history? I wouldn’t be able to count one of these MPs to go and do the job that these brave servicemen do on every day.
As for the money this war is costing, perhaps these MPs with their subsidised meals, drinks etc should choke on these and go and see the conditions our troops have to eat and drink on a daily basis.
Pun, Food for thought!
JT // September 7, 2009 at 10:18 am |
Swanny
Saw that but I suspect it some Civil Servants in MOD who are the culprits this time rather than an MP. Or more likely one of these consultancy firms who are paid millions to waste our money.
The Defense Ministers don’t know what the f…k is going on most of the time. They are changed so quickly before they know they even know where the bog paper is kept. The civil servants know this and keep them in the dark.
Sloop JB // September 7, 2009 at 9:54 am |
There was a time when anyone doing something to harm the country were taken in on a charge of treason put against the wall and shot. I under stand that would be classed as barbaric but what about the barbaric atrocities they are committing, what about our civil rights, if the EU allows us to have any, or our own government for that matter.
Jack Madron // September 7, 2009 at 4:08 pm |
Bollocks to the EU. By the way. Can any one tell me when the French added red and blue to their flag?
JT // September 7, 2009 at 6:53 pm |
Irish Olympics
JT // September 8, 2009 at 2:50 pm |
2 people offered me a seat on the bus today. Why does that make me depressed?
Jack Madron // September 8, 2009 at 8:44 pm |
Never mind JT.
Don’t forget. There’s a helluvalot that haven’t made it this far. When people ask, “How I am”. I always answer. “Still Here”.
SWANNY SWANSON // September 8, 2009 at 4:27 pm |
All. Had visit from Keith and Maureen Mannings today which is Doris’ and mine 53 years Anniversary. We took them out for a meal at lunchtime at the Pirate Pub at Alverton where Jack lives just out side Penzance and had an excellent meal.
Keith was telling us that they had been out for meals with my old girlfriend and her family and had a fantastic holiday in Bermuda and how much it has changed over the years, roads, traffic etc, he has been going there for holidays every other year since 1986 and loves the place and people there and finds them so hospitable, bit different when we were there, they never liked us much black or white. Mind you no one liked us much in the world generally as Soldiers.
ED: Congrats Old Cheps!
JT // September 8, 2009 at 6:14 pm |
Swanny
I think that connection with your ex girlfriend and and family is brilliant after all these years. I sometimes wonder what happened to my girl.
JT // September 8, 2009 at 6:16 pm |
Swanny
Happy Anniversary and many happy returns.
Annie and John
Jack Madron // September 8, 2009 at 8:38 pm |
Swanny and Doris.
Sorry for being late. Happy Anniversary, and have many more.
Jack and Ruth.
Barry Cornish // September 8, 2009 at 9:39 pm |
Swanny and Doris.
I would like to add my good wishes and congratulations to you both. Harry Anniversary! Barry.
JT // September 8, 2009 at 6:28 pm |
Sloop
I left a message for (I think) is your son on the Empire Clyde blog.
SWANNY SWANSON // September 9, 2009 at 12:27 pm |
All. Doris and I thank you all for your kind thoughts and wishes for our 53rd Anniversary.
A Pullthrew Ex Pte RAOC // September 9, 2009 at 4:47 pm |
Dear Blogs (got it write this time)
Talking about RAOC i was in Bicester depot 1949-51 my jiob was ticking thiongs orf.
Then visited Colchesyter for a bit for flogging stoff (tyres) to locals gippos.
Before your time sproggs get some in ha ha
Editor // September 9, 2009 at 11:34 pm |
GOOGLE WEB SITES
Those of you who (occasionally) browse the many 1DCLI and related sites, all of which are listed in the Blogroll rhs of each blog page, might notice some problems.
I’m advised by Google that all the older websites are being auto transferred to new web address locations. I have noticed that many photo images are either missing or out of sync with the text and at this stage there’s nought I can do about it. Bear with the situation please, all will be well in due course.
PS: While I have the attention of the more serious Regimental Historians, please note the updates to the Lt. Col AJ Marsh blog.
Carpe Diem!
SWANNY SWANSON // September 11, 2009 at 9:30 am |
All. I have now put a bit of news on MMG blog. Jack was here visiting me yesterday, he has been very poorly for the past week with bad stomach, hopefully he is clear of the virus now.
As usual we were going over past events etc. We were saying how good it is to have few more old friends and mates joining the blogs, there are lots more out there, as Derek always says GOYA and join us. We are all getting on so all who reads these blogs come and join us.
Best surprise for me was my old mate has joined the blog via his son in law and we phone each other on a regular basis. I am referring to Cpl Dave Besley who sadly told me his dear wife passed away six months ago. Doris and I have invited him if he wishes to come down to Penzance to stay, as said life is short time for all of us.
Editor in Brisbane // September 12, 2009 at 2:24 am |
EDITORIAL & BLOG DISCIPLINE ISSUES
Omar Kayam put it quite succinctly:”The moving hand, once writ, moves on”
The problem with writing a Comment, is that within a few days/weeks it is succeeded by fresh entries and is overtaken onto older pages.
However here goes: When you post/reply to a blog kindly consider first the topic and its relevancy to the Blog Page. Do not necessarily blindly follow the originator in reply, but revert to the more appropriate blog page, to comment. I’m hoping that general stuff is contained to ‘Unbelievable’, whereas other more specific comments are – hopefully, self indicating.
F’rinstance, Harry Patch matters are DCLI, nowhere else. Jamaica issues are for the MMGs page etc etc. Empire Clyde is obvious, all Regimental stuff is DCLI also. But, try not to mix ‘em up, geddit?
If we can’t exercise some reasonable direction, then we might just as well have a single page and we can all blog and be damned. Which in turn means that pages will rapidly disappear from view and – as has happened in the past – the load time will extend beyond your patience.
And Yes! I’m aware that some pages (DCLI), (Korea), and others, get ‘blocked’ at times, bear with me over these WordPress glitches.
Also, even if this reminder is painful to some! kindly spend a few minutes and browse each and every page available to examine the original flow and intent expressed in the leader.
JT // September 12, 2009 at 9:14 am |
Thought for today.
76.5 % of statistics are rubbish.
JT // September 12, 2009 at 9:17 am |
25% of people cannot tell you what 25% of £1 is.
60% people do not how how many millions in a billion (try it ask 10 people today)
Editor // September 12, 2009 at 6:08 pm |
SINISTER PLAN AFOOT
Unbeknown to locals, it is believed that plans are in place to develop a new strain of Cornishmen. The latest have names that begin with an “H”, so one assumes that earlier imports are already concealed in the SW community.
Shall we complain to our local Member?
Or maybe, the beginnings of a new line in hotdogs for the English tourists!
JT // September 12, 2009 at 6:19 pm |
Ed.
And who will be the first for a recipe for these plump little creatures. (not you Jack calm down).
ED: Well, noting the extreme shortage of fresh white crab meat, experienced recently by one well known local of long standing fame, one might deduce a high demand in the more salubrious public houses in Penzance, f’rinstance.
JT // September 12, 2009 at 6:53 pm |
True Ed
But heaven forbid that the Chef de Cuisine (an oxymoron?) at the Union Hotel in Penzance puts them on as a “Special” particularly if I may say so using your recent recipe.
Jack will I am sure pick up on the moron bit….
Gotcha again Jack.
ED: One ponders on the lively lasses at said Establishment, handling furries! Maybe Jack has some advice?
JT // September 12, 2009 at 7:06 pm |
Ed
Actually the lasses at the Union were quite attractive. Particularly the Brazilian (no comments on this word please. You have to be very careful these days). She resisted unsurprisingly my requests to meet her in the corridor near the Gents. It was just that they were f…g rude.
ED: Perhaps they’d been handling furries all day before we arrived? Heaven forbid the Host had longish locks!
Jack Madron // September 13, 2009 at 5:02 pm |
How dare you call oxen morons.
JT // September 12, 2009 at 6:16 pm |
Ahem. As council for the defense in this pre trial hearing for a General Court Martial, firstly my clients plead Guilty as Charged and request that the case is passed back to the CO for Summary judgement.(Better this way, the CO can only give 28 days detention).
However I must enter a plea for mitigations as follows: Whilst the “reply” function is of course extremely useful is it not a fact that on a busy day when the Old Gits for some unknown reason are stimulated to make several entries that day.
The reply in these cases is shunted back and occasionally lost to the sick lame and lazy who do not scroll up to look? Indeed some may not understand how to do so (and as Ed has pointed out why should they?)
ED: Public Prosecutor has advised that maybe the case is brought too early and in fact higher education standards are required, to wit. When in fact “replying” to an established Comment (that may/may not) have been erroneously placed, the (proper) use of CAPITAL LETTERS as a headline, serving as a means to introduce the following subject matter, as drafted by the Responder. Editor has agreed to embolden said CAPITAL HEADING as a means of drawing attention, ifasandwhen placed in the proper blog.
L/Cpl Topper Brown QC // September 12, 2009 at 6:58 pm |
Ed
Please advise the Prosecution that we are most grateful for their response and only wish we could understand it.
ED: Well s’like this, mah learned friend. Use CAPITAL HEADERS to attract content thus: (In fresh Comment Box)
ATTENTION! ATTENTION! (Editor’s emboldment)
Reply to crap written earlier on ‘t wrong blog, blah! blah!
JT // September 12, 2009 at 7:07 pm |
See what happened to the replies ED?
ED: Excellent examples!
Editor // September 12, 2009 at 7:31 pm |
HERETO AN EXAMPLE (Capitals emboldened by Editor at editorial option)
REPLY TO JOE BLOGS’ COMMENT ON MMG BLOG (incorrectly placed. Shoulda been here on Unbelievable Blog).
Joe Blogs, get yer ‘air cut!
JT // September 12, 2009 at 8:28 pm |
Ed
Trouble is that I for example, cannot embolden fonts on this application
JT // September 12, 2009 at 8:54 pm |
Ed
Rather than using the reply function which seems to be inappropriate in this instance as time and space have been used and due to my inability to use EMBOLDENED fonts I refer to recent comments regarding the landlords locks. It is more likely that he cavorts with the barman than the waitresses.
Jack has not made comment about “Brazilians” yet so we might assume that such female embellishments have not yet arrived in Cornwall. In this case perhaps your comment about “furries” may have fallen on stoney ground.
I’ll leave it to you to explain.
ED: Er, well by way of (part) explanation. Do they call Cornish cats ‘pussies’
JT // September 12, 2009 at 8:56 pm |
Ed
Doh. Got it. Use CAPS and you will embolden.
ED: Yep – right on. The WordPress function (in’t Comment Box) is limited and only offers upper/lower case. As one might observe also, the editorial options provide for both embolding AND italicising.
JT // September 13, 2009 at 5:32 am |
Jack
I hope you accept that I was referring to the grubs and not you when I mentioned plump little creatures earlier.
Jack Madron // September 13, 2009 at 4:52 pm |
JT.
I must point out that you are wrong on the ‘little’ part, even after, nearly a fortnight’s crash dieting. Sod this for a lark. Dieting I mean. As for the Brazilians, one helped us to beat Spurs yesterday.
Must look up Yellow Pages and try to find a free or extremely cheap Oxford Don to translate most, if not all the above coments. On second thoughts, I won’t bother as it would take Blair’s missus all her time to do that and she’s a QC.
Does QC stand for Strange Pussy ?
In her case, I think so.
Jack Madron // September 13, 2009 at 4:55 pm |
PS.
Those CAPS, are they from Holland ?
JT // September 13, 2009 at 6:19 pm |
Jack
No the Andy Capp family are Lancashire
JT // September 13, 2009 at 6:21 pm |
By the way I keep forgetting to ask. Whose house is that on the Header ? Have I missed something?
ED: Priscilla’s Cottage, Childrey in Berkshire. Just a simple random record of beautiful England. No Mossies! only Hosses on the Lambourn Downs, Ed’s Wantage area childhood origins.
JT // September 13, 2009 at 6:25 pm |
Jack and Swanny
I see in the paper today that Chelski Russki collapsed when trying to climb Kilimanjaro.
Why didn’t he use his helicopter ?
SWANNY SWANSON // September 13, 2009 at 7:06 pm |
JT. Didn’t know anything about it. I think his thoughts were on the ban on Chelsea has gotten to him, with the FIFA ban and fine etc. I will go on the web to see if there are any comments on what you have told me.
Editor // September 13, 2009 at 7:35 pm |
ATTENTION: AFGHANISTAN BLOG
This Comment serves 2 purposes. Firstly to draw your attention to an emboldened Heading. (You type in caps, I embold it)
Secondly, to attract commentary involvement in a fucking war that is unwinnable and a shameful waste of British lives (and US & Canadian lives), and the lives of other Allied soldiers too.
Editor // September 13, 2009 at 11:22 pm |
SIGN OF THE TIMES? (Note bolded cap heading)
Missus has placed a fridge magnet that reads:-
“I sometimes wake up grumpy in the morning, but most days I just leave him there”
BROWSE MORE
Jack Madron // September 14, 2009 at 10:24 pm |
ED.
Just one question. Do fridge magnets automatically turn upsidedown in your part of the world? Magnetic poles? Waking up, grumpy. I liked that.
JT. Don’t tell my missus to buy one. That’ll only make me grumpier. What’s the point of fridge magnets? The doors are heavy enough to open without that extra weight.
JT // September 15, 2009 at 7:19 am |
Jack
On another scientific note. When you wee in the sink in Horstralia does the water swirl clockwise or anti-clockwise while going down the plug hole?
ED: Interesting question, sorta ‘when did you last beat your wife?’ Trufe is, I wouldn’t know, not having (recently that is) peed in a sink. I do recall instructions from my early sailing days to not piss into the wind, unless one wants one’s own piss back – but I guess that I must defer to higher Dept of Physics authorities.
Jack Madron // September 15, 2009 at 11:19 am |
JT.
Being already down under, wouldn’t that be up the plug hole? Just a thought. I do get some at times.
Ed.
That’s the easiest way to get your own back.
JT // September 15, 2009 at 1:03 pm |
Jack
Yes of course you are right, they didn’t mention that in the Beano scientific supplement.
JT // September 15, 2009 at 11:16 am |
Ed
It is a fact that in the Southern Hemisphere water swirls down a plug hole counter to the same in the Northern Hemisphere. At the equator you can demonstrate this even 20 yards each side of the line.
My question was really to check that you guys run the tap after peeing in the sink.
ED: Help Sylvia, give us some hedgehog soup recipes please!
Sylvia // September 15, 2009 at 2:57 pm |
You should think yourselves lucky that you can pee in the sink, I can’t!
JT // September 15, 2009 at 5:24 pm |
Sylvia
As a member of the blog Elf and Safe Tee committee I urge you not to try.
As you may be aware 29.6% of accidents in the home are by falling off things. We have no statistics at present concerning ladies attempting such practices which must remain alas, a male prerogative.
PS: A form of Indemnity is in the post.
Sylvia // September 15, 2009 at 9:43 pm |
JT
I think the fact that women can’t pee in the sink is being male chauvanist, point him out and I will sue. Goodness we could get enough of a pay out to move out of this ‘orrible country. What do you think?
JT // September 15, 2009 at 11:39 pm |
Sylvia
Were you thinking of emigrating to Canada by any chance? Dave would be so thrilled, they need a few more pale faces in Dog Patch BC. How are you at chewing leather by the way? This is where the teeth subject comes again in I’m afraid.
Gettin a bit of deja vu here.
Sylvia // September 16, 2009 at 12:09 am |
JT
Deja vue, no I use steredent, nothing but the best for me.
Perhaps Dave will come back from trapping, especially as I believe he got excited last time we discussed this matter. I don’t think I would live in Canada, it gets to cold. I would like somewhere hot, with no stupid politicians, no unnecessary taxes, nah! this is silly there is no such place, might as well stay here.
JT // September 15, 2009 at 11:22 am |
QED
ED: Blek Magik
JT // September 15, 2009 at 1:06 pm |
Sylvia
Why not try this for Sunday lunch ?
Sylvia // September 15, 2009 at 2:55 pm |
JT
Yummy yummy, nice bit of tucker. Don’t know if even I would eat sauce made of fish head and entrails, although I may have with out knowing probably at our local Chinese takeaway. They will put anything in Dim Sum!
Editor // September 16, 2009 at 9:36 am |
HELP! HELP! I’M BEING REPRESSED
Shades of Grated Britain today!
Carpe Diem!
JT // September 16, 2009 at 5:35 pm |
National Health Service of the future?
ED: Mmmm JT. Hereto a continuation of Monty Python’s questionable tastes. CLICK THIS LINK
Editor // September 17, 2009 at 7:55 am |
DIRTY ‘OLE VICAR
Probably Fluffy’s brother!
Sylvia // September 17, 2009 at 9:14 am |
Hi guys,
I’ve been working hard in the garden, settling it down for the winter, bit late for that as I think winter started last Sunday. Could do with a massage this week as my knees and hips are really complaining!
Also got to spend the weekend sorting out the caravan, as the awning will have to come down soon, by Monday I will be properly cream crackered. Poor old soul, oh woe is me.
Still the following weekend I have a ticket to see Cliff Richard and the Shadows at the Millenium Dome (I don’t think they call it that now). I expect I will now get comments about his sexuallity and his colostomy bag. He’s not really gay, he just helps them out when they are busy.
I hope you are all well, and if I don’t get chance to pop in over the weekend, have a nice birthday ED.
Catch you all soon.
ED: Thanks Sylvia, nice to be remembered. Family lunch on Sunday at the Golf Club.
SWANNY SWANSON // September 17, 2009 at 9:47 am |
Sylvia, you mentioned your garden. My wife Doris does most of the gardening here, like you she gets all the aches and pains etc. Autumn is here she picked the last of our apples yesterday. Winter just around the corner. Had Jack around yesterday afternoon I had my denims on doing a bit of painting on the house. My son-in-law came in the morning and painted the top gable end as I am not up the that now. First time I have been on this blog for a time, really enjoy all of your comments.
Swanny.
Sylvia // September 17, 2009 at 6:58 pm |
Swanny,
I’ve only got the rockery to tidy up now, if I’d done more during the summer instead of swanning (forgive the pun) off to the caravan, it wouldn’t need so much work now. I hope you are going to give Doris a nice massage!
JT // September 17, 2009 at 10:44 am |
Happy Birthday Derek.
Luncheon at the Golf Club? very posh. BBQ Grubs for starters? Yummee.
ED: Thanks JT, probably pass on the grubs, might partake in the bucket of prawns though, washed down with a James Squires brown.
PS: Thought I’d beat you to it! Now fuck off, I’m full. Monty Python link.
JT // September 17, 2009 at 10:54 am |
Rant for today
A Sikh police officer in the Met has claimed constructive dismissal for racial discrimination and requires £200,000 compensation.
In training for riot control he was required to wear a hard helmet instead of his turban and refused. Its against his religion innit
Also because of an inflammatory gel he puts on his beard he refused to have riot training in which petrol bombs are thrown at the trainee squad.
Sylvia // September 17, 2009 at 1:13 pm |
JT
He’ll probably get the money, there is none so racial as the ones that don’t belong here.
Another burden on the tax payer. When I was working and claiming my pension, I was taxed on my pension as well as what I was earning, this story makes me sick. I was going to defer my pension, but if I had ‘popped my clogs’ before I claimed the deferment my son wouldn’t have got a penny, and I wanted to carry on working for the social side of office work.
Gosh, I’m being really grumpy today, will have to drag myself out of that mood. I’d better treat myself to the biggest cream cake I can find.
JT // September 17, 2009 at 6:12 pm |
Sylvia
Here is the plan.
Change your name by deed poll to say Jasmin Khyam.
Get rigged up in a full burkha plus sunglasses.
Apply for say 50 jobs and send CV.
e.g Police force, Sales Rep, etc
When you get an interview go rigged out as above. If you don’t get the job you will need a bent firm of solicitors (No win no fee type) preferably Jewish.
Sue all the companies who have not offered you a job for big bucks (say £250,000 a pop)
We are on a winner Kid. Just 5% for me OK ?
JT // September 17, 2009 at 6:17 pm |
Sylvia
Ok it needs a bit of tweaking. Like learning a bit of Arab or Urdo whatever its called.
Well get you a Linguaphone course.
Sylvia // September 17, 2009 at 6:42 pm |
JT
I could always say I was born here, innit man
Sylvia // September 17, 2009 at 6:45 pm |
JT
I can see your train of thought, along the lines of walkng around the street with lit candles, specially Gravesend
JT // September 17, 2009 at 7:38 pm |
Sylvia
No No I was just correcting my spelling error concerning the Sicks (sic) beard gel.
You’ve lost me now… You been drinkin ?
Sylvia // September 17, 2009 at 8:10 pm |
JT, there I was thinking you were pondering on the fact that the beard gel is inflammable! Typical women reading too much into things. Thought you might be plotting something. And Gravesend has 3 Siek temples, and is referred to as little Pakistan.
Hope the race relations won’t knock on my door, cause I’ve got candles burning here.
JT // September 17, 2009 at 8:26 pm |
Well Elf and Safe T should stop this beard gel lark. Its bleedin dangerous innit ?
Surely nowadays they could get a fireproof gel.
SWANNY SWANSON // September 17, 2009 at 4:12 pm |
Happy Birthday Derek from Doris and myself. Fly over on Saturday night and I’ll buy ‘ee a pint of Black Velvet, have a good day mate, on second thoughts I’ll have a couple for ‘ee on Saturday.
ED: Thanks Swanny
JT // September 17, 2009 at 6:03 pm |
Swanny
A minor (don’t worry I don’t mean Miner. Coal etc) technical question. Why is your name underlined signifying a link?
ED: I’d better answer this ‘un, ‘cos I do believe that Swanny has overlooked an ‘auto’ function in his Comment Box. At some time or other Swanny has (mistakenly) entered part of a URL (with all good intentions I’m sure). Because that URL was only partially written, it fails to ‘link’ BUT does leave a trail that shows up as an underlined title name to every comment that he logs. Most of the time I erase it, but one or two get through.
Swanny, if you read this, simply clear the “Website/URL” line in your Comment Box.
Sylvia // September 17, 2009 at 6:53 pm |
Evening guys,
Didn’t think I’d have time to pop in tonight but here I am, for you sins.
Wot no Cliff Richard jokes! couldn’t you just squeeze one out.
JB will be back soon I’m sure he will find one, do you think Tom doesn’t know we are usng this blog now, he has popped into Dad’s blog a couple of times, should somebody tell him.
Jack Madron // September 17, 2009 at 9:47 pm |
That Harry Webb, he must be the oldest Living Doll going. He’s glad he’s Travelling Light if he’s got to Move It. Bachelor Boy still though.
Sylvia // September 17, 2009 at 10:00 pm |
Thanks Jack,
That’s the politest Cliff comment I’ve heard in a long while. I can’t believe that he’s actually getting back with the Shadows for this tour. I had to book my ticket at the end of last year, had to keep re-dialing the number for hours before I got through. I managed to book a coach trip so I don’t have to go wandering round London, on my own, at night.
Jack Madron // September 17, 2009 at 10:29 pm |
Hi Sylvia.
Not the original Shadows, I bet. Do you remember the first band? Hank Marvin. Bruce Welsh, Jet Harris and Tony Meahan. Their first name was The Drifters but they had to change because there was an American vocal group with that name. Just a little useless info.
Sylvia // September 18, 2009 at 11:00 am |
Jack,
Not so useless info. What was useless was that I got 4 copies of his book ‘Cliff’ for Christmas last year. No mention of him being ‘intimate’ with one of their girlfriends. Intimate was a word they used a lot in the News of the World when I was young, now that is useless info. My friends and I used to giggle when we read it, we thought it meant kissing.
JT // September 17, 2009 at 7:32 pm |
Sylvia
Well I guess he should really be commenting on MMG blog unless it related to your Dad and family.
Better tip him off, though I guess he will be reading the other blogs and should get the message.
Sylvia // September 17, 2009 at 8:03 pm |
JT
Sorry I didn’t mean to imply Tom shouldn’t be on that blog, I just noticed that he hadn’t been on here lately, then I remembered we had moved.
Barry Cornish // September 17, 2009 at 8:19 pm |
If Terry Simons has found his way on to this blog. Here is wishing you a Happy Birthday and many Happy Returns of the Day.
Barry.
JT // September 17, 2009 at 8:30 pm |
Barry
Well I haven’t seen him.
Do keep up Barry, we are confused enough already.
Barry Cornish // September 17, 2009 at 8:42 pm |
Hi! John,
I have now discovered Terry on the Re-Union blog and told him that this is where most of the bloggers are now to be found. I have been enjoying your contributions, Sylvia.
Sylvia // September 17, 2009 at 8:54 pm |
Barry
I was on e-bay looking to see if I could find some cheap wool, when I heard my name mentioned, and being vain had to come and see. I hope I’ve made you laugh along the way, and would like to wish your mate Terry Happy Birthday.
Yes, I am my fathers daughter I’ve got ears and eyes everywhere.
JT // September 18, 2009 at 12:10 am |
See that Dave ?
Sylvia has her own teeth (and hair), so she can chew skins for your moccasins. Now looks like she can knit blankets for trade with the up country Inuit.
This gal is jest perfect for those long winter nights in typee or even the igloo if you go North for the winter seal hunt. What a catch!
Sylvia // September 18, 2009 at 10:48 am |
JT
I roll me own fags an’ all mate! And no! I don’t put recreational substances in them.
Editor // September 18, 2009 at 2:55 am |
BROWSE THIS UNBELIEVABLE AUSSIE LEGAL CRAP!
These legal fuckers are no different it seems than the cretins in Grated Britain. Here’s a skilled Dive Instructor husband who wilfully leaves his missus on the ocean floor to drown and fails to lift a fucking finger. Look at the primary sentence he gets for murder. Now the legal bollocks over ‘reasonable’, ‘fair’ and ‘just’.
Take a life under any circumstances – 20 years I say – no parole.
I know this is in Queersland (!) OZ and that this case wouldn’t have rippled in your Meeja, but just to let you know that bureaucratic idiocy is not only the province of the UK.
JT // September 18, 2009 at 10:27 am |
Derek
Well in Grated Britain he would have got couple of weeks community service and then got a crooked lawyer (there are many) and sued for compensation .
JT // September 18, 2009 at 11:19 am |
Rant coming up
Cameron say Tories will bring back fox hunting..
Supporters are banging on with their tried old mantras.
“We have to keep the fox population down coz they are vermin”
Why then do hunts breed fox cubs and release them when the area runs shirt of foxes ?
“Its not just for posh folk the local villagers love to follow the hunt”
Well nowadays most local villagers are either city folk (posh) with second homes there. The true local locals usually drive to the nearest town to work and definately dont follow the hunt like the old time peasants. They watch football on telly or go to the match.
“But it is our heritage to hunt”
But so was badger bear and bull baiting
So was public executions until 1868 (Crowd loved them)
Dog fighting ?
“Banning will cause massive unemployment in th country side”
No one has lost their job because they drag hunt
“Horses will disappear from the country side”
Really ?
“What about the poor hounds”
Well they are killed at age 7
Other cultures have heritages to:
Cutting off hands and feet
Stoning to death
Its cultchur innit ?
JT // September 18, 2009 at 11:36 am |
I read that nearly all members the shadow cabinet went to Eton and are all millionaires. i.e they know fuck all about how the peasants live and care less.
MP’s bang on about the “undeserving poor” the benefit “scroungers” while fiddling expenses and looking forward to their obscene pension pots. “Get em back to work they cry or stop their benefits”,with 2.5 million unemployed? Bastards. Here endeth the rant.
Jack and Dave, get that Vickers serviced.
Jack Madron // September 18, 2009 at 11:41 am |
JT.
I’m all for Fox hunting. That is, Fox the MP and all the vermin MPs with him. Hey, we could have a field day.
SWANNY SWANSON // September 18, 2009 at 1:34 pm |
All. Following JT’s comments on fox hunting etc, did you see on TV that evil cow who instigated the underwold of dog fighting? What an arrogant bastard she was, she left the court and when the media tried to speak to her she wouldn’t even comment.
Ours, like Derek said about his neck of the woods, is the same, the law is an ass. Give these people when caught ought to be put in a big pit and let a couple of pit bull dogs rip them the same as these people do to those poor dogs. Only answer really is bring back the birch. As for fox hunting you don’t see any manual workers following them, just right wing Tory Toffs, Cameron’s Mob.
JT // September 18, 2009 at 8:24 pm |
Swanny
I agree bring back the birch. Also for the fox hunters who also break the law and the police do fuck all about it.
JT // September 18, 2009 at 4:57 pm |
We have a situation on London commons where men on bikes ride behind people with smallish dogs, grab the lead and ride away to a nearby car. The dogs are sold to people with fighting dogs to tear apart for practice .
Can you begin to imagine ?
JT // September 18, 2009 at 5:50 pm |
Fox Hunting
The hunting folk say that the “ordinary” village people love the hunt and turn out to watch. Well some do. But you don’t see ‘em at the Hunt Ball do you. The main attraction is to be seen in their finery with their stirrup cups with the local peasants gawping at them.
” But the hounds kill the fox instantly and it feels no pain.”
Well a woman on the radio today said the hounds caught a fox in her garden and it screamed for some time before it died as the dogs tore off its legs, ears, tail etc
JT // September 18, 2009 at 8:31 pm |
Well we have the “posh” and the wannabe posh don’t we ?
The posh in every case were born into privilege and wealth. Public school etc. Then we have the “pseudo posh” the self made man (spivs) and bankers or even worse the children of same who are even bigger snobs. Or even worse than that, the new “celebs”. Each category hates the others.
OK I am foaming at the mouth now so I will go to bed. I am just pissed off coz Annie has poured my wine into a casserole.
Sylvia // September 18, 2009 at 8:35 pm |
JT
What a wonderful lady your Annie is, if I hadn’t just finished eating I’d pop round for wine casserole. What else did she put in it?
Jack Madron // September 18, 2009 at 9:12 pm |
JT.
Isn’t casserole a posh word for stew? Anyhow mate, the one who eats the most drinks the most.
Have noticed that JB is back from his gallivanting. Thought I heard the faint strains of “Scarborough Fair”, drifting in from Old Grumpy blog.
Sylvia // September 18, 2009 at 9:22 pm |
Jack
I was listening to the radio earlier this evening, they did a 30 min. show about Anne Shelton, one of your favourites, (I think that’s what you said, although I can’t find our comment now) some of it from a show she did 20 years ago, still sounded good today.
Jack Madron // September 19, 2009 at 1:07 pm |
Hi Sylvia and JT.
Wrote two answers last night to your comments about Anne Shelton and Beef Stew and each time I clicked Submit, I lost contact with the net. There are two comments out there somewhere flying around the universe. Also had same trouble with moving from one blog to another. I’ve forgotten what I said last night, but never mind, it was only trivial chat.
Sylvia // September 19, 2009 at 1:27 pm |
Jack,
Nothing you say is trivial, and is always valued by us bloggers. I know JB had the same problem, and as I have a warped sense of humour, I wonder if those comments have ended up on the Womens Institute blog we could be curdling their cream cakes!
JT // September 19, 2009 at 12:34 am |
Jack
You are right, and to make it worse the recipe said Boeuf Bourgignon or summat.
Looks like the Grumpy blog is being used a lot. Thought it was just for grumps about the blogs.
ED: Ahha, speaking French are we? Try Monty Python’s version
JT // September 18, 2009 at 9:05 pm |
Hi Sylvia
Shin of beef slow cooked for 7 hours at 100c. Fantastic. She also “found” me another bottle. What a star.
Sylvia // September 18, 2009 at 9:40 pm |
JT
Mmm lovely grub.
Editor // September 18, 2009 at 10:07 pm |
ASSHOLE SUPREME!
Read about this cretinous arsehole.
Ahmadinejad calls Holocaust a ‘myth’
JT // September 19, 2009 at 12:35 am |
Ed
Grumpy blog ?
Editor // September 19, 2009 at 1:28 am |
JT, are you inviting my response for the purpose/intent of the Grumpy Blog? If so, your initial interpretation is/was correct, in that it offers an opportunity to have a say on matters: Blog Page 1, bullshit, for the use of!
However, as is usual, a more wider opportunity is evident, which I suspect, will only lead to ‘more confusion’. The troops have already appropriated it for wider purposes. We’ll let it run and see what happens, it will at least poke fun at how we see ourselves.
Tempus Fugit!
Sylvia // September 19, 2009 at 9:03 am |
I’m very sorry JT
It was naughty of me
To use the Grumpy Page
With no visible rage
I bow my head in shame
and won’t ever do it again.
Only joking JT, I started off trying to get JB to tell us what was wrong with the hotel, then went into ’showing off’ mode. Typical woman!
JT // September 19, 2009 at 7:23 am |
Thanks Ed
I thought that was your intention.
Tempus Edax Rerum
SWANNY SWANSON // September 19, 2009 at 9:00 am |
ED. Got carried away again, wrong blog I answered on HR’s Blog to Tom. I remember who he is now, sorry Tom. I spoke to you and your wife at Bodmin this year. I was also speaking to Dick Rich who also did Commando Training. Grovel, grovel sorry again Derek for going on the wrong blog.
ED: Jankers in the coal hole Swanny, Repeat after me….etc etc.
Sylvia // September 19, 2009 at 9:07 am |
Swanny,
I am really pleased I’m not the only one. How are you and Doris today? Has Doris got over her aches and pains from gardening. I’m just going out to start on the caravan garden, much, much small but the ground is solid.
Sylvia // September 19, 2009 at 12:17 pm |
JB
So apart from having to walk up the stairs, did you and your wife have a good time
Sloop JB // September 19, 2009 at 12:46 pm |
Sylvia,
Thank you very much for asking and yes we did have a good holiday. Our little legs were tired out time we got home. Scarborough is quite hilly, as anyone who has been there will tell you. We went to York which is very nice, saw the Minster, very beautiful, how they built those places is a marvel. Didn’t walk the wall this time, done that years ago. Visited Whitby a lovely old fishing port then back to heartbeat country, didn’t see any actors as they don’t film there any more. Saw Filey, Bridlington and lots scenery over the Yorkshire Moors, quite a full schedule.
JT // September 19, 2009 at 2:40 pm |
Sloop
Wee facilities on the coach OK ?
SWANNY SWANSON // September 19, 2009 at 4:52 pm |
Sloop JB, Yorkshire always saying about their county. You should of come down to GODS COUNTRY CORNWALL, we have better weather, bigger fishing ports and our lingo is easier to understand and the best beaches in all ter UK, there is always next year JB.
Sloop JB // September 19, 2009 at 5:48 pm |
JT,
Pee operations went well, got to take the pee bottle back to ward 4 to have a replacement. I didn’t splash me trousers either, thanks for asking. Wee had plenty of stops on the way up and back.
JT // September 19, 2009 at 7:34 pm |
Sloop
Tight fisted bugger. You can get a plastic one from Boots. No wonder the NHS is going bust
Sloop JB // September 19, 2009 at 6:08 pm |
Swanny,
You’re too late selling Cornwall to me, came down 1953 stayed ten weeks in Bodmin, liked what I saw been coming down ever since. In fact I was in Cornwall Jamaica as well, done waitering at garden party for Sir Hugh Foot Governor of Jamaica, he was a Cornish boy like you. One of my Ancesters came to Cornwall as an agent for someone, One Hundred & Twenty Seven Pounds in his pocket to purchase St Michaels Mount but it wasn’t enough, bad luck wouldn’t you say.
JT // September 19, 2009 at 6:58 pm |
Sloop
One of my North Country ancestors Eric Blood Axe, never made it South of Sheffield. His lads refused to carry the long ship. Bolshie bastards
JT // September 19, 2009 at 7:31 pm |
I am researching for my degree thesis .
Can you all please tell me the following:
What was the price of double egg and chips in a UK NAAFI in 1953 ?
We have touched on this before in an earlier blog when I was trying to establish the price of a Great Western Railway station pork pie and a cup of tea in 1954.
Jack was helpful at the time as he was of course train spotting (before enlistment) and had spent a long time on railway stations.
Jack Madron // September 19, 2009 at 10:04 pm |
JT.
The only train spotters down here are the seagulls.
JT // September 19, 2009 at 7:32 pm |
GOSH this Chilean wine is strong
Sloop JB // September 19, 2009 at 8:49 pm |
JT,
They North Country blokes got to be seen to believed.
JT // September 20, 2009 at 10:14 am |
All
I am going up t’ North for a couple of days to visit my mother. (She is 96 and a lot fitter than me)
Play nicely together
Sylvia // September 20, 2009 at 11:17 am |
JT
Safe journey to you and Annie.
Jack Madron // September 20, 2009 at 12:29 pm |
Sylvia.
Sept 20. 1956. Anne Shelton was number one in the charts with “Lay Down Your Arms”.
2. Doris Day. “Que Sera Sera.”
3. Bill Haley.”Rockin’ Through The Rye”.
9. Lonnie Donegan. “Bring A Little Water Sylvie”.
Memories.
Sylvia // September 20, 2009 at 1:25 pm |
Jack
As Mum had the radio on all the time, I do remember these songs. they played Lay Down Your Arms on the programme I was listening to. I would have been almost 9, Even now I prefer the radio to the TV. I also remember Mrs Dayl’s Diary and the Archers, also the plays in the afternoon. There was no one more pleased than me when they bought out audio books, especially the classic ones, because I didn’t understand them when I was reading them at school. Most evenings I listen to them while I’m sewing or knitting, or butting in on the blog.
I don’t expect you would have listened to the radio much in 1956, as you would have been in your late teens and listening to the pub calling.
Go on dish the dirt, did you wear drainpipe trousers and have your hair brylcreamed into a mullet? (After you were demobbed of course)
Jack Madron // September 20, 2009 at 3:57 pm |
Hi Sylvia.
You’re so kind saying I was in my late teens in 1956. Unfortunately I was 22 yrs old. Still a teenager at heart though. I did wear drainpipes but used Trugel not Brylcream for my DA styled hair.
I used to enjoy listening to the radio, especially Sat and Sunday nights. Jack Jackson used to have a programme of top records but I can’t remember which night he was on. Those were the days.
Sylvia // September 20, 2009 at 11:54 pm |
Jack
We are all as young as we feel, it’s just that different parts of my body feel different ages, for instant my brain thinks it’s 18 but by knees and hips feel 98 but the rest of my bones only feel 88!
We used to listen to a play on Saturday night, my brain is saying it was called ‘The London Dungeon’, but my brain doesn’t always get it right, anyway it scared the poo out of me but we were allowed to stay up later if we wanted to listen.
As for dressing up to go out, when we were in Bodmin, we would go out of the barracks with our skirts at a respectable length, then when we thought we couldn’t be seen we would turn the waist over several times to end up with a mini, what must we have looked like, onlookers must have thought we had a car tyre up our jumpers. There was a coffee bar at the top of town, not that we were allowed to go in it (but we did).
Sloop JB // September 20, 2009 at 11:02 am |
JT,
Enjoy your few days, and hope the family is alright.
SWANNY SWANSON // September 20, 2009 at 12:31 pm |
ED. Now had phone call from Anne and Joe Knight. Doris and I would like to wish them both a belated Best Wishes on their Golden Anniversary on 12-9-2009 which they celebrated with family and friends. Quite a few of Joe’s Ox and Bucks old mates attended he was saying, they had a very nice time.
They asked if I had been in contact with you Derek, I said we mainly keep in touch on the various blogs and they both send you their best wishes. They are both looking forward to coming to Cornwall with Griff and Jennie next June, he said they will be bringing a bottle of Champers to celebrate their Anniversary then.
Jack Madron // September 21, 2009 at 11:38 am |
Ed.
Many Happy Returns of the Day. Have a nice one, mate.
ED: Thanks Jack.
Sylvia // September 21, 2009 at 9:13 pm |
Hi guys
It’s lonely in here today, have you all gone to a party and not invited me! I’ve got a party frock, and I’ll wash and I promise not to sing.
Jack Madron // September 22, 2009 at 12:38 pm |
Hi Sylvia.
Tried answering you, last night but for some unexplained reason, as soon as I submit, I lose the internet. It’s been like this for three or four nights now. Same with the blogs. I’m on one, click to another and again lose the internet. Can’t figure it out at all.
If there’s a party going on, I haven’t been invited either. Bit too old now for parties, really. That’s my excuse, anyhow.
Editor // September 21, 2009 at 9:18 pm |
HOW BLOODY TRUE
This was written by a British Soldier- he makes a lot of sense!
I work, they pay me.
I pay my taxes and the government distributes my taxes as it sees fit.
In order to earn that pay, I work for the MOD.
I am required to pass a random urine test, with which I have no problem.
What I do have a problem with is the distribution of my taxes to people
who don’t have to pass a urine test.
Shouldn’t one have to pass a urine test to get a benefit cheque because
I have to pass one, to earn it for them?
Please understand that I have no problem with helping people get back
on their feet.
I do on the other hand have a problem with helping someone sit on their arse, drinking beer and smoking and using drugs
Could you imagine how much money the government would save if people had to pass a urine test to get a benefit cheque?
Hope you will pass this thought along, because something has to change in the UK & soon!
Jack Madron // September 22, 2009 at 12:43 pm |
Ed.
Replied to this last night, but as I’ve just said to Sylvia, lost contact with net. That soldier is perfectly right. Urine test the bloody lot, including all MPs. They all act like dopes.
JT // September 22, 2009 at 6:35 pm |
Greetings
Back. Only got a 48 hour pass
Sloop JB // September 22, 2009 at 7:29 pm |
Hi JT,
Welcome back, hope everyone and everything was fine at the old homestead. 48 hours isn’t very long on a visit such as that, hardly time to park your bum, know doubt you enjoyed it though.
Sloop JB // September 22, 2009 at 7:37 pm |
ED.
Comment
The Soldier is definitely right. The British People who are worth anything has been expressing these views for a long time now, but as we all know the Government do not intend to do anything at all about it.
JT // September 22, 2009 at 8:09 pm |
Little bit from the news.
The fucking CBI have produced a list of ways to reduce public expenditure, some examples.
Stop paying winter fuel allowance to pensioners:
Pensioners no longer to get free TV license when they are over 70:
Stop free bus passes:
Stop the inflation proof guarantee for state pensions
How long until compulsory free one way trip to Switzerland? Think we had better get organised?
JT // September 23, 2009 at 11:04 am |
Ed
Wow, that’s some kayak. Sure you got the correct plans? No wonder it’s taking so long.
ED: Do you mean SS Great Britain?
JT // September 23, 2009 at 2:26 pm |
Ed
Yes, thought it might be the legendary kayak.
Editor // September 23, 2009 at 11:29 pm |
TAKE TIME TO VIEW THIS MAD HATTER
CNN video linked to Subscriber’s Name. Capital Heading embolded.
JT // September 24, 2009 at 5:42 am |
Ed
Brilliant clip. What a character. What a nut case and Grated Britain has SAS training his Army and Northern Ireland police training his cops. This is Gordons new pal.
JT // September 24, 2009 at 12:59 pm |
Col Ghaddy
His entourage tried to erect his tent in a rather up market area in New York. Locals complain say it is too down market.
This man is a gem.
Sloop JB // September 25, 2009 at 7:29 pm |
I wouldn’t like to play snap with him, the bloody cards would be all over the place when he dealt, shoot!!
JT // September 25, 2009 at 8:21 pm |
Well he’s a card alright.
Dave H // September 29, 2009 at 4:33 am |
Well i suppose this comes under this Blog , I am in the Forces Reunited , and just looked in there ,( Im Gob Smacked ,) I see about 10 DCLI are in there Names are there , Now if they can join there why in hell arnt they in here , Something stinks here , Look in there guys see if you know any of them ,
ED: I’m not all unhappy that you are using this blog. DCLI is down at the moment anyway, which is about the only other location applicable. Big hugs DH.
ED: DH, got your detailed email and must say (initially) that I’m well aware of that platform and in fact am a member, without ever having responded, so I’m not really qualified to make further comment. What I will say however is that FR has become very aggressive (in my experience) in ‘pushing’ membership, and the referral has to start somewhere. I’m not sure if its totally free of charge!
On another note, and in fact where Jack ‘discovered’ you, is the BLI website and its Guestbooks, which is driven by Keith Scudamore in Bournemouth. As you probably know it offers a wider messaging and comment register for most older LI Regiments, although has been somewhat curtailed lately. Few 1DCLI cheps use that facility and if so are also recorded somewhere on OUR blog photos, if not an occasional subscriber. On that note, I AM qualified to make comment as for 3 years I’ve monitored all BLI messages for spam and have seen the spread of entries, and have not been all that impressed with either the quality of DCLI banter or names that cover the Caribbean era.
Anyway, thanks for your emailed details, I’ll check ‘em out.
PS: Remember too, that effectively, we’re a pretty ‘exclusive’ bunch in that we really only focus on 1952 – 1957, and mainly the Caribbean posting. As Editor I receive 100s of emails monthly from relatives of older DCLI (WW1 – late 1940’s) seeking service details and photos etc, for which of course I’m unable to assist. Same for the HMT site. I really only have interest in the Empire Clyde.
JT // September 29, 2009 at 8:24 am |
I have also found Forces United a pain in the ass, ditto Friends United.
Editor in Brisbane // September 29, 2009 at 8:53 am |
EDITORIAL IMMUNITY OVER THIS THREAD
Dave, as stated – OK to use this blog for this topic, now that we’ve started. However, I ain’t about to dignify FR or any other blog system by comparison to WordPress. There is just no other game in town!
Of the many names you supplied from Forces Re-United:-
Firstly, I observe – no photos, but that may/may not be relevant as an example.
Secondly, Dunbar, Farrant, Goddard (Qld Gold Coast) Trevor Hosking, Reg Mitchell, John Rutter RIP are ALL known to me, having made text or image contributions across my sites. T’others no idea.
What I can say is that John Goddard is not a prolific writer of anything. I ghosted his Memoirs which he drafted. John Rutter’s son Tristan has promised! Reg Mitchell and Trevor Hosking sent photos for “A” Company web site 2 years ago. Dunbar and Farrant have written to the HMT site.
From that FR sampling, I’d say that there’s no more to expect – so far as we are concerned, and to echo JT, they’re a pita and I know for a fact that ‘language’ is spammed out! Anyway, so what? Where’s the best place to open a new Chinese Laundry? (Next to the existing one).
PS: Just to add some gobbledegook that might be of interest. WordPress is in my opinion, the state of the art best blog system. Today accepting 236,724 individual blogger messages, 223,470 new postings and 54.3 million words written. As ‘owner’ of all the LI Most Wanted URLs, I can for no charge select from hundreds of permutations of layouts, columns, sidebars, widgets, RSS feeds, live video feeds. Customised graphics and auto HTML and much much more. If I wish to pay a modest fee, I can shift higher up the options scale. There is no way that I would even countenance a switch and risk having the lot gobbled up by some unscrupulous entrepreneur.
PPS: (Quote) WordPress is more than just software; it is a community, a rapidly expanding ecosystem, and a set of philosophies and opinions about how to create the best Web experience. When you embrace it, you’ll be in good company. WordPress users include old media organisations such as CNN, The New York Times, and The Wall Street Journal, along with millions of personal bloggers like myself for whom WordPress is a means of expression (Endquote). Matt Mullenweg.
Dave H // September 29, 2009 at 7:02 pm |
Wow Derek , took me all afternoon to digest all that and missed my coffee break , but as with the e-mail you sent me i get the drift of it all , Talking of Drifts there soon will be white ones here but im tuff i can take it , but wish i was like the bears here ,, go to sleep for the Winter ,
ED: Good stuff DH, all worth the effort. Send us some photos of the real white stuff you get there.
Dave H // September 29, 2009 at 11:25 pm |
Will send some pictures when we get a good dump of it Derek, but I’m hoping its not soon, as they are saying we are getting the El Nino this year, which I hope as it will save me a few $$$ on the heating bill.
ED: Thanks Dave. The only real snow that I can remember is in Scotland in ‘65, when I played golf in the winter with a red ball and chopped a hole in the ice to go fishing for pike.
Editor // September 29, 2009 at 11:43 pm |
9/11 A DAY OF SORROW
Just in from JT. Let us never forget what these bastards are capable of.
I’ll also post to header section of blog.
PS: Requires a Google Gmail Account to view
JT // September 30, 2009 at 6:34 pm |
I have a rant coming on. Watch this space ’til I stop foaming and biting the carpet.
JT // October 1, 2009 at 12:24 pm |
Rant
As you know I share with most of you a general mistrust and dislike of pollies. But I think that the Sun Newspaper announcing on the day of Browns big speech is bloody disgraceful. The Sun newspaper is owned by that crook Murdock the Ossi spiv. His only agenda is to sell newspapers and make money. So he backs (because he senses that Labour is fucked) the Conservatives i.e Cameron & co. who never had to worry about money in their pampered lives.
Cameron. ALL his shadow cabinet are millionaires and most went to Eton. So they know fuck all or care less about the “lower classes“ as I suppose they call us at their dinner parties with their friends.
Regardless of the political party (if any) supported, I believe that the media are to a large extent guilty of talking this country into recession particularly the property market. This added to the global near financial melt down caused by the crooks who run the banks in America and UK .
Trouble is our pollies were so interested in their own little scams they just had no idea or understanding what was going on. Every day for past 2 years we were bombarded with bad news by the meeja.
So can we now look forward to Cameron, creep Osborne and co ruling us?
I am running out of rant for today but happily learn that the most read book in UK at present is another book by Jordon (Katie Price ?)
Geeze! as Dave would say.
Dave H utchinson // October 1, 2009 at 5:36 pm |
Right on JT Geeeez It must be one of those guys that is building a home not too far from here in the mountains , its costing millions and is only going to be used by the owner for about 4 weeks in the year but by all accounts there are quite a few people from the UK doing the same thing , it frosts my asss ,
JT // October 1, 2009 at 6:15 pm |
Dave
Bastards, they are setting up their hidaways for when the world gets really fucked up.
Think I might get my Para (noid) wings this year ?
Jack Madron // October 1, 2009 at 8:47 pm |
JT. there is an answer but shooting is against the law. I think you’re wrong about fertface and his cronies and their parties. I bet they don’t even think about us. Inbred bastards.
DAve H // October 2, 2009 at 3:20 am |
JT & Jack they are the chosen dontcha no ,
Jack Madron // October 1, 2009 at 8:52 pm |
Robber in gaelic is TORY.
JT // October 4, 2009 at 7:54 pm |
Going back to the Sikh copper. He got £10,000 compensation and he can now wear his turban when on anti riot duty.
Course if he gets a bang on the head he will then claim more big bucks compensation. “Elf & Safe T innit. ”
Course if his bosses prevent him from attending riot duty he will claim its race discrimination and against his Human Rights.
JT // October 5, 2009 at 8:55 am |
Now The Tories have their conference. Both sides are trying to divert attention from their own greedy scams and hammering the poor.
“Get em back to work”. Er where are the jobs? we are heading for 3 million unemployed. All this hatred directed to the so called “idle” while the scum on top of the pile cheat, avoid tax grab obscene bonuses.
JT // October 5, 2009 at 10:57 am |
DEMOCRACY
I have opened this heading so I can rant under and so hope you Meldrews will join me.
Editor // October 5, 2009 at 11:24 am |
‘Questionable English Democracy’
anagrams to
‘Necromania squelches bigotedly.’
JT // October 5, 2009 at 5:58 pm |
The new rich.
Tracey Emin that con “artist” who sells her stuff like an unmade bed and dirty knickers to rich fools has decided to live abroad to avoid the additional 10% tax on her earnings over £120,000. She is a multi millionaire.
The “celebs”who make their money from their fans such as Pop stars, Sean Connery & co overseas rather than pay their share and support our country.
Simon Cowell has a birthday party costing over £1 Million. (no tax in UK) Guest are the very very rich.Celebs, crooks, bankers and hangers on.
The stately homes and estates are being bought by the celeb lot who are the new “Gentry”
The bankers threaten to live abroad to avoid tax on their obscene bonuses which they have started again.
But in both political parties the main agenda is to hammer the benefit claimants. Many born into hopeless environments, crap parents, have no education, no hope of improvement.
Not exactly a level playing field is it ?
The well fed fat cats say they will stop all benefits for many poor bastards……then what ? back to the workhouse system ? Gas chambers ?
JT // October 5, 2009 at 6:24 pm |
There are of course a good number of claimants who do work the system and also moonlight for cash jobs.
Apart from Members of Parliament I mean.
Talk about reforming the benefit system. The rich also get child allowance and winter fuel allowance if over 60 , free bus passes , grants with making their houses fuel efficient etc.
They bank it and love it and its a f………g disgrace.
JT // October 5, 2009 at 6:26 pm |
OK OK so I am hogging this blog. Might go to Hyde Park Corner on Sunday with megaphone.
Sylvia // October 5, 2009 at 6:32 pm |
JT
There are always going to be people that know how to work the benefits system, most of them illegal immigrants. With the money we, as a country, shovel into their forever open hands, we could put that in to the small businesses that are going bust and create more jobs.
JT // October 5, 2009 at 6:28 pm |
I am a blog hog.
Jack Madron // October 5, 2009 at 8:23 pm |
JT.
Stand for parliament. I’ll vote for you.
JT // October 6, 2009 at 2:19 am |
Jack
Can you get over to Bodmin and borrow that Vickers ?
Jack Madron // October 6, 2009 at 11:39 am |
JT.
It’s no bloody good. The lock (firing mechanism) is missing.
JT // October 6, 2009 at 3:11 pm |
Jack
Bloody typical of the MMG lot those riflemen might say. “Never ready when needed”.
Jack Madron // October 6, 2009 at 6:06 pm |
JT.
We know how to use a rifle as well.
I bet the lock was hidden by a rifle coy bod.
JT // October 6, 2009 at 6:58 pm |
As in Lock Stock and Barrel
Jack Madron // October 6, 2009 at 11:11 pm |
Good one.
Dave H // October 7, 2009 at 4:46 am |
What are you lot doing on this blog , GET BACK TO WHERE YOU BELONG , You are even leading Sylvia astray
JT // October 7, 2009 at 10:43 am |
Dave
This is usually a rant blog but we get led astray. But once the thread is broken people go to another blog. Like “Change Step” “leftrightleft” or was it “Break Step”
At each end of the Albert Bridge in London there is a little notice “marching Troops Break Step” from Victorian days to stop the bridge oscillating? because of the regular rythmn of marching in step.
ED: Thanks JT for reminding the bloggers about discipline. Your ‘break step’ reference also applied on the Clifton Suspension Bridge for the same reasons.
Sloop JB // October 7, 2009 at 11:38 am |
I’d rather march over a bridge and Break Step than go on a stage and Break a Leg.
JT // October 7, 2009 at 1:07 pm |
DAILY RANT
A Grayling is a bottom feeding fish. Today the bottom feeding Shadow Home Secretary Chris Grayling made his speech at the Tory Conference.
Just one bright idea. He will stop binge drinking by putting up the price of a 4 pack of strong lager by £1.25. Wow, that should do it (31p per can ?). Stop ‘em dead wont it? Bloody draconian innit ?
This plus more rubbish was from a man who was nominated as one of the worst expenses fraudsters in the expenses scandal which the pollies have all put to one side relying of course on the amnesia of great educated British public going back to concentrating on
X Factor
East Enders
Strictly come Dancing
Jeremy Kyle show
and of course Footie
PS: What happened on Corrie on Monday? I missed it.
Bah
JT // October 7, 2009 at 2:09 pm |
Foaming still
Today we had Grayling, a bottom feeder. Yesterday we had Osbourne a bottom FEELER (Eton) telling us the great plans for “the ordinary people” (lower class scum)
This oily little creep represents a party that voted against the winter fuel allowance for pensioners/
Voted against inflation proof pensions with a minimum 2% annual increase. Voted against a minimum wage
We are all in this together he said (7 times) yesterday.
“But some people are more equal then others?”
But we must get the benefit claimants back to work i.e We have to screw the poor coz its our nature innit ?
“In the good old days old boy the jolly old ancesters had children of 5 worked 14 hour shifts in the mines and mills until the meddling socialists objected.”
This man also claimed dodgy expenses.
Bah
JT // October 7, 2009 at 2:13 pm |
Annie says I am going all red again. Time for a nap
Jack Madron // October 7, 2009 at 3:29 pm |
JT.
Red is a nice warm cosy colour.
Red sky at night, Jolly boating weather.
JT // October 7, 2009 at 2:21 pm |
Watch out for Georgy at the end.
JT // October 7, 2009 at 4:56 pm |
Having been wakened from my friggin nap twice by those BASTARDS who phone at least 3 times every day asking me if I want a loan etc or free holiday and want me to phone back (on a number which charges money per minute while they keep you on hold). I wish I could trace these calls back to a number and find the call center and go there and throw in in a can of petrol followed by a match. (White Phos grenade would be better but they are hard to get from Boots)
Bah
Sylvia // October 7, 2009 at 5:03 pm |
JT
If you google ‘telephone preferance service’ you can put your phone number in and within a week or two you won’t get any more calls. It’s an offical site so theres no worries attached to putting your number on it.
Will you please calm down, you are worrying Annie. Although all of the above are disgusting, you will blow a gasket if you keep on.
JT // October 7, 2009 at 8:38 pm |
Cameron tomorrow. We hear he banned champagne at the conference in case we peasants got the “wrong” impression. But he and cronies were spotted last night privately drinking bubbly at £140 a bottle.
Today his wife was wearing jeans, “try to look ordinary darling” Wonder she didn’t get a temporary tattoo round her neck; barbed wire maybe ? “Look like a chav dear”
Editor // October 8, 2009 at 3:21 am |
GUARDIAN. UK ARTICLE ABOUT CALIFORNIA
JT has alerted me to the parlous economical state of California’s finances. Worth a browse – check the 2nd photo at page header – linked to Guardian article. Frightening stuff happening to the world’s 8th largest economy – seemingly out of control. Can these lessons teach the British and the Aussie pollies anything? – I fear not – just keep spending, like there’s no tomorrow brudda!
Dave H // October 9, 2009 at 9:48 pm |
Who gives a shit about Califoria, its ready to fall into the ocean soon , anyone in there right mind would move out ASP , they must be all good swimmers that live there
Jack Madron // October 8, 2009 at 12:48 pm |
We’re all going to be OK.
Gen Sir Donut is joining up with Fertface.
JT // October 8, 2009 at 4:00 pm |
Jack
As in Donut forsake me ?
JT // October 8, 2009 at 4:35 pm |
Jack
Get that MMG out
JT // October 8, 2009 at 7:05 pm |
Conference report
JT // October 9, 2009 at 6:30 am |
Jack
I bet the current Army chiefs are really chuffed that Donut now works for the Tories. “Pissing into their tent from outside?”
Editor in Brisbane // October 10, 2009 at 4:55 am |
SO WHAT’S THIS BLOKE ACTUALLY DONE?
(Quote) On 27 November 1895, Alfred Nobel signed his last will and testament, giving the largest share of his fortune to a series of prizes, the Nobel Prizes. As described in Nobel’s will, one part was dedicated to “the person who shall have done the most or the best work for fraternity between nations, for the abolition or reduction of standing armies and for the holding and promotion of peace congresses”. (Endquote)
Unbelievable! in my view. Presides over a fucking crippling unwinnable war – in Afghanistan, with a major increase of troops and Iraq still unsettled and maybe Iran just around the corner. Ali fucking Baba still on the loose and the terrorist Mossies infiltrating our Western portals each and every day.
Presides over an economic regime that is both gutless and ineffectual so far as corporate rip-offs are concerned. Wins the Nobel Peace Prize. You’ve gotta be joking!
God (sic) save us from Politicians and the snivelling courtiers who suck up to ‘em. Where are the statesmen when you you need ‘em – like coppers – too few, too late, no balls.
(Quote) “If none of the works under consideration is found to be of the importance indicated in the first paragraph, the prize money shall be reserved until the following year. If, even then, the prize cannot be awarded, the amount shall be added to the Foundation’s restricted funds.” During World War I and II, no prizes were awarded. (Endquote)
Quote Los Angeles Times
“The Nobel committee didn’t just embarrass Obama, it diminished the credibility of the prize itself.”
Dave H // October 12, 2009 at 5:34 pm |
I think our leader should have got it for that speach , Live Long and Prosper Oh Great one
Jt // October 10, 2009 at 8:21 pm |
Ed
I reckon the Nobel thing is way past its sell by date anyhow.
JT // October 11, 2009 at 6:17 am |
LOONEYLAND
Supermarket checkout fool refuses to sell 2 bottles of wine to a mother of 0ver 50 because she was accompanied by her daughters of 17 and 18 ” in case she was buying alcohol for them”. The wine was with basket of groceries.
“Its against the rules innit ?
ED: Would condoms have been OK?
JT // October 11, 2009 at 10:12 am |
LOONEYLAND
Some Muslim checkout staff at supermarkets now refuse to check out alcoholic drinks and call a manager to do so.
Its against their “human rights innit ?”
ED: Can Catholic check out chicks refuse to check out groceries with condoms in ‘em?
Jt // October 11, 2009 at 10:16 am |
LOONEYLAND
Muslim canteen cook working for Met Police refused to cook or serve breakfasts containing bacon, pork sausages etc. resigned and gets an award from Employment Tribunal for Constructive dismissal.
JT // October 11, 2009 at 10:21 am |
LOONEYLAND
Fire Fighter is also safety officer at his fire station. He is not allowed to use a small step ladder to change light bulbs.
Its Elf & Safe T innit ?
He regularly goes up 40 foot ladders when training or at real incidents
JT // October 11, 2009 at 12:50 pm |
Charity justgiving.com (supporting wounded soldiers but mostly themselves) made £2.5 Million PROFIT last year. They pay their 57 employees an average of £68,000 each. The boss gets £120,000 plus bonus. They are hoping to “go public” soon which will make their founders millionaires overnight. Charity begins at home you see.
Editor // October 11, 2009 at 2:24 pm |
REPEAL OF THE ‘DON’T ASK, DON’T TELL’ US MILITARY BAN
ON PARADE DUCKIES!
Jack Madron // October 11, 2009 at 3:55 pm |
Phil the Greek is in a quandary. His skivvy can’t work the remote control.
Oh diddums.
JT // October 12, 2009 at 1:34 am |
Jack
My skivvy can’t either and I am not much cop at it. Course a battery now and then might help.
JT // October 12, 2009 at 8:14 am |
NOBEL PRIZE
Yasser Arafat was a previous winner plus several other dodgy characters. Obama should have turned it down.
ED: Agreed JT, what a show of integrity that would have been. Big backfires looming I feel!
Dave H // October 12, 2009 at 8:17 pm |
Gas prices fall below $2.50 a gallon
This me lads is in the US OF A. We are paying about $ 3.60 Now a lot of the oil that makes this gas comes from Canada, so you know who controls the prices. Don’t we?
ED: Ferk me Dave, we in OZ pay AUD$1.18 per litre, that’s AUD$5.50 per gallon equivalent, which on today’s value is USD$4.80
Jack Madron // October 12, 2009 at 10:25 pm |
Simple remedy Dave. Get a herd of moose to run into the pipeline.
Dave H // October 13, 2009 at 5:05 am |
Jack Moose dont heard , but Mountain Goats do , but they are not worth a shit
Jack Madron // October 13, 2009 at 3:40 pm |
Dave.
Never been introduced to a moose so I wouldn’t know about what you call a lot of them. A mouse is mice so would moose be meece? JT is bound to answer this for us.
Dave H // October 15, 2009 at 12:28 am |
ED OZ like this country has gone TAX Mad , Canada has oil just up the road from me is a bloody big hole in the ground where they are digging the shit out , now most of this oil when it has been refined is shipped to the USA for the us dollar the same goes for the Natural Gas , what is left over is for us here and taxed to the hilt , they have now hit us with an energy tax , what they call a cabon tax its paid on the gas for your car , and whatever you use to heat your home be it elecric or otherwise its on your monthly bill , I think i will go out and chop some wood , Bastards will probably tax that , OOPS Just remembered they do tax it , as some people have these wood pellet heater , ( Stoves )
Dave H // October 13, 2009 at 12:08 am |
Jack i would like to build a 20 ft wall on the border and the same around that French Province , you know the one , this goverment sucks big time , just like yours , i see on our news tonight that you Prime minister has to pay back some mony he claimed as expences for the gardener and cleaners , , Looks good on him , WAYtogo
JT // October 13, 2009 at 3:04 am |
Dave
You could build a 30 ft wall around Dog Patch and declare independence.
ED: ‘Allo, ‘Allo, who’s up early then?
Dave H // October 13, 2009 at 5:02 am |
Yes we could JT now get back to Bed , The MRS will think you have buggered off
Jt // October 13, 2009 at 7:45 am |
Dave
I am the Night Watcher. Never get stickman
Editor in Brisbane // October 15, 2009 at 8:34 am |
HO! HUM!
Just another bloody day at the beach, beats working though!
PS: All fishermen are liars, except thee and I and I ain’t so sure about thee!
Jt // October 15, 2009 at 10:37 am |
Derek
Tough life out there. Why don’t you apply for asylum in UK ?
Jt // October 15, 2009 at 6:01 pm |
Most days we can read in the Meeja daily at least three or four totally conflicting reports:
Recessions is coming to and end
Recession likely to be prolonged
Antarctic Ice shelf is melting
Antarctic Ice shelf not melting
Only 5000 Polar Bears left ; becoming extinct
Polar bears increased by 27,000 in last 10 years
CO2 is causing global warming
No it isn’t it slows down global warming
We are heading into Ice age (10 years ago)
We are heading into massive global warming
North East Passage (over Russian arctic sea sailed by 2 ships first for 3000 years
Er No it was regularly used in WW11 and before
When Ice melts seas will rise by 100m
No due to it wont rise at all by ice melt
Fucking Meeja. Any old crap for headlines
Dave H // October 16, 2009 at 5:25 pm |
JT its like saying How long will it take to boil an egg on top of Mount Everest
Jt // October 16, 2009 at 5:58 pm |
Dave
How long will it take to boil an egg on top of Mount Everest ?
Jack Madron // October 18, 2009 at 1:00 pm |
All depends on how long it takes to get to the top without breaking aformentioned egg.
Don’ t forget the matches.
Dave H // October 19, 2009 at 11:49 pm |
JT , the water would not boil at the top of everest , The pressure Temperature Difference compared to Sea Level , it was a trick question on our Steam Exam,
Dave H // October 20, 2009 at 12:04 am |
A boat entered Canadian waters and looky what was on board. Ross believes the newcomers are Sri Lankan Tamils based on the pictures he’s seen in the media and the fact that another boat-load of Sri Lankans was intercepted outside Indonesia en route to Australia last week. The wooden cargo boat carrying more than 250 Sri Lankans was stopped in Indonesian waters on Oct. 11.
Ross said he would like the government to open its doors to the newcomers as the Mulroney government did in the 1980s, when a boatload of Sri Lankan asylum-seekers showed up on the coast of Newfoundland.
Ross, who has worked on the ground in Sri Lanka, said the newcomers are likely asylum seekers who used the black market to gain passage on the ship.”They put their hope on this nation and I hope the nation responds in a positive way for them,” he said.
Now this lot will get free everything from housing to medical which I myself have to pay for, pisses me off. I think Canada should send them on their way to OZ, we have quite enough, thousands to be exact.
Editor // October 20, 2009 at 2:40 am |
IT’S TIME TO END THIS ILLEGAL IMMIGRATION TO THE WEST
No doubt, we all have opinions as to when, where and how these poor buggers are managed. No Western Economy desires to see a bunch of freeloading, illegal migrants of any colour or creed, abused by their handlers and bypassing the front door. There is a finite limit to the cash handouts, the medical handling of disease and the disabilities, the accommodation rosters that any of us can sustain indefinitely.
Because of the OZ Rudd’s Government reversal of the 2 year wait portal for Social Service benefits, we have seen an escalation of a 40% increase in 2 years over and above the national projections – an extra AUD$700 million annually. We have a Navy that acts in a humanitarian role to ensure safety for these ‘boat people’ when they travel from Indonesia across the Timor Sea, yet because of terrorist behaviour are reluctant to get involved.
Regular Aussies, who like the Canucks and the Poms, have paid taxes and voted over the years to build a safe haven for each respective Nation, with health systems, schools, welfare support, and have, in my opinion, a right to expect effective, sensible protection from illegal entry, we should I believe empower our border authorities to immediately export ALL ‘illegals’ to the last port of departure, by International Accord. No processing, no delays, no freeloading – just ship ‘em back with an invitation to follow the correct procedures. Then let the ‘host’ country of departure sort out the problem. If their laws and control are so slack as to permit people smuggling, then let them wear the consequences.
The current ‘passage’ from Sri Lanka to Indonesia is alleged to be US$8,000, so with that sort of cash in the bank (in Sri Lanka), one might ask the question as to why the need to be smuggled.
I note also that not one of these Asian boats heads for Iran, or Algeria, or India, or Pakistan, or Egypt, or China, or Japan, or Afghanistan. “Let’s pick on Whitey, he’s a soft touch!”
I refer to my proposed Border Signage at the page header. “Fuck Off! we’re full”
PS: What really gives me the shits however, is that almost without exception, these ‘refugees’ with their archaic religions and beliefs, disgusting attitudes towards women in particular, and unhygienic practices, and parasitical dependency on aging Western populations, avoid the adoption of the new host country’s ways. These misbegotten people quickly import their beliefs into the ‘new’ society and change and ignore the orderly way of life and generally create mayhem. Look at Grated Britain now – after years of patronage and generosity – a morally corrupt segment of newcomers inserting foreign religions, home grown terrorism and languages – all in the expectation of the very freedom that they rebel against. Moreover the very law of the Mother Country that we all contributed to in some way – protects the fuckers!
Dave H // October 20, 2009 at 5:06 am |
ED on the news tonite , they found that each of them paid 45000 $ each for the trip , now where in hell did they get that kind of money ? Geeez i worked here for 40 od years and i get a measly little pension , i have to pay my own medical insurance own dental , and have to pay a deductable of $1500 of